My guy and I have been together for almost one year. I do not think he is cheating on me because he works three jobs (until 9:00 p.m. at night and on weekends too) and when he's not working, he's either with me or talking to me on the phone until he goes to bed (usually after midnight). Here's an example of the problem: one day when we are together, he is very affectionate (holding hands, kissing, etc...not all over each other, but just normal, sweet attention that doesn't have to lead to sex) and it is mutual. Well, the next time I see him, it's almost like he goes out of his way to NOT touch me. He will hug me hello and give me a hug and a couple of short kisses good-bye, but that's it, (but sometimes maybe just a hug) not even just snuggling while watching tv or anything, no arm around me, no hand holding, nothing. He does this often. I start thinking maybe something is wrong (with US) and worry. Then the next time I see him, things are okay again...usually more than okay.
2007-03-03 01:32:44 · 10 answers · asked by Stealth_1 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Additional...This happens fairly regularly...it seems like if we have a really great night and I feel we are closer than ever, the next time I am with him is when he acts like this. He will be this way for a little while, then back to normal. Note: we don't see each other every day due to work scheduled but we talk (he calls me) every day/night. I don't get it and it hurts my feelings but I don't want to pressure him by throwing myself on him either. Another note: I don't think this is just about sex or cheating or anything like that. We have been together for a year and we have a lot more in common and enjoy each other's company for more than sex...but that is good too. I don't think he has another agenda or plans because I am very understanding...I don't smother him...we both spend quality time with friends/family (without each other) and I am supportive of that...don't want to be smothered myself. I just don't understand the change sometimes and it hurts me and worries me.
2007-03-03 01:39:21 · update #1
I think you are assuming things. And I think you are expecting things a lil too much of him. He doesnt have to show you that affection you want ALL the time. Everybody gets in those moods where one moment they wont show much affection and then later they will. Well good luck =]
2007-03-03 01:38:28 · answer #1 · answered by Odessa Fraser 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend does the same thing and we've been dating for over 3 years. I wouldn't begin to assume that he's messing around behind your back unless he gives you some real evidence to believe that. He's probably just being a guy. Some days, my boyfriend is incredibly affectionate and loves talking on the phone with me. And the next, he wants nothing to do with being on the phone or cuddling all night. It's hard not to take his actions personally. I used to think that he acted that way because he wasn't into me, or didn't care about me...but you can't go on doing that or you'll become really insecure about your relationship.
It sounds like to me, your boyfriend is a really busy guy!!! Maybe somedays he just needs time to relax...no touching, kissing...but to just wind down and zone out on his own. He still gives you a hug hello and short kisses goodbye...which is very sweet! I would just take into consideration that he is working 3 jobs and maybe sometimes when he's off of work, he needs his own time.
I wouldn't get concerned unless this behavior becomes and everyday thing.
Good luck hun!
2007-03-03 09:40:25 · answer #2 · answered by autumn 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is going threw sumthing, why don't u ask him? OR if u already did ask him again? Dont' give up on him....thought this same thing happened to my sis it was indeed cause he was cheating on her....Does he really work three jobs? Or maybe he is just tired of those 3 jobs ..trust me my momz is and she only works 2? Try giving him a surprised visit in one of his jobs and bringing a lil gift ...gud luck !!
2007-03-03 09:49:38 · answer #3 · answered by Ana♥Banana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, people do get mood swings sometimes. and it's probably not you, it's probably something wrong happening in his outside life, other then you. maybe something happend with his family, or friends? you should probably talk to him about it, or just test him. by testing him you would act the same way, and see how he reacts. if he asks you about it then tell him why you're doing it, and then ask him why he's been so distant & then normal, and then back again.
2007-03-03 09:37:55 · answer #4 · answered by Caitlin E 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your suspicion is normal because my first guess would be cheating also, but the best way to find out the problem is to communicate. Just ask him about it. You never know what the outcome may be.
2007-03-03 09:38:40 · answer #5 · answered by Lucky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow thats a really interesting questu=ion because I am currrntly going threw with hat same situation and I have no idea what i was going to do so the next time we went out I asked him and he told me that he didnt even notice whatb he was doing and thanked me for asking him
2007-03-03 09:39:47 · answer #6 · answered by Lucy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it the male hormones.
may be one day he feels affectionate and another he is just not. the hormones change .
but not to burst ur bubble or anything maybe he might be cheating on u .
why don't u ask him???
QUESTION DESERVE ANSWERS!!!
2007-03-03 09:42:35 · answer #7 · answered by kelley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he wants you to make the moves when he doesnt.
2007-03-03 09:38:41 · answer #8 · answered by Wilson J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u dont know unless u ask him
2007-03-03 09:35:50 · answer #9 · answered by Laura J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's a guy. It strange, just don't worry.
2007-03-03 09:35:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋