Any suggestions on what to do with 15 year old son coming home drunk last night? His Dad away at work just me?

Answer 1

I'm assuming that your 15 year old son is a Freshman in high school. Drinking is something that he'll have to learn how to deal with for the rest of the time he's there, and especially if he chooses to go to college. More than likely, he really wasn't aware of the cause and effect relationships that go with alcohol, both to his body and with you, his parents.

Use this as a learning experience for him. Explain to him that alcohol is not something that he should be engaging in until he's an adult and can make his own decisions. Try to get him to talk about whether this is the first time or not - if it is (or as long as he isn't drinking several nights a week), don't flip out and start sending the poor kid to alcohol counseling simply because of this. Alcoholism is something that appears after many years of heavy consumption - unless your son as been drinking since he was 8, you don't have to worry about him being an alcoholic.

Let him off with just a discussion about alcohol this time; this is a learning experience and now he knows. Explain to him, though, that if he ever does it again while he's living in your house you're going to make him wish he never knew what alcohol was. I'm talking completely removing TV/computer/Video Game sets from his room if he has them, and revoking his rights to any entertainment you have in common areas. Take away his ability to hang out with friends at your house and his ability to leave your house. Also, make him volunteer every weekend at your local house of worship if you're religious, or at a local community center if you're not. But remember that these are things you should keep in reserve in case he ever tries this again, not things you should place on him now.

The most important thing to remember is that your son is going to interact with many things now that he's in high school - some not as bad as alcohol, and some worse. If you throw the book at him now over his first instance with this, you're only going to make him scared to confine in you about other things he may need guidance on. However if you don't make sure he knows the consequences of repeating this, you're going to look soft and simply invite repeat behavior. Show him the size of the stick he'll be hit with, so to speak.

Answer 2

Well Lockdown.

Who was he with? Call all their parents. You can punish him but the parents of the other kids have to do the same or it could happen again the next time that he is with them. Plus if they do not know what happened, they need to.

Ground him - and ground him big. You have to send a message that this is not ok. Take everything, video games, cell phone, not going anywhere, no fun, no tv. NOTHING. You have to send a message loud and clear.

Make him go to a drug and alcoholic counselor for an evaluation. Just to make sure that this is not a regular thing and the first time he was caught.

Him getting drunk once at 15 does not mean that he is an alcoholic. I think that is a bit of a rush to judgment but what it does say is that he is not following the rules and he is not seeing the dangers of drinking.

Call the local jail and take him to a scared straight program. that is where the take him to jail and show him what it is really like to be an inmate. They search him - make him wear the jump suit, eat the food, lock them in a cell. It is harsh but it worked for my son.

Good luck. I hope that you get through to him real soon.

Answer 3

You can ground him but it doesn't matter. He is going to do it anyways. Trust me im 16 so I know what im talking about. And all that stuff about telling the other parents. Do that and you just made him hate you for the next ten years. That is big advice. You don't turn your kids friends in. That is like if your own son were turning them in. Don't do it. Just ground your own son but its not gonna help. the only thing that will make him change his mind is experience.

Answer 4

take him down to the soup kitchen and intro him to the homeless.
Explain the connection between the bottle and the bottom. Explain how many members of the family are stupified with alcohol.
show him a dead 15 yr old at the morgue, let him touch.
Photograph his friends, numbers on back, do it all the time, each new friend. Call parents if it gets fishy, organize.

Answer 5

I'd start with grounding his butt for a month. Giving him chores to do around the house during his grounding. Than after he gets off grounding moniter his every move for months till he gets the idea that he isn't allowed to just go off and do whatever it is he wants to do. Have you called his dad at all for his opinion on what to do with him? That is another good start.

Answer 6

are you his MOM? call his dad, this is a BIG RED FLAG! he is turning into a full blown alcoholic! he needs help- get it for him!