Why doesn't anybody like me?

Question

Why is is always that I'm trying to help people out, but I can never get a break myself. Why am I always broke even though there's so much opportunity arround me? Why are girls always telling me to get lost even thoug I'm the only guy who's ever done anything good for them? What's wrong with people who are telling me to just be myself, when that's all I've been trying to do my whole life. Why is it that I've been putting so much effort trying to make the world a better place and yet things have still ended up the same way they always were and I'm still alone and misereable?

Answer 1

you are a nice guy... if you relate to this i salute u! xD

"This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what aholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassurinhg pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girls every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once theyre at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow dont end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldnt worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree youd ever orchestrated in GTA:Vice City to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didnt have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing serious between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: oh, but were just friends! And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because youre nice like that.

The nice guys dont often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys dont seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I cant. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as oh, hes too nice to date or he would be a good boyfriend but hes not for me or he already puts up with so much from me, I couldnt possibly ask him out! or the most frustrating of all: no, it would ruin our friendship. Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I cant figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (Im going to sleep with this complete *** now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesnt last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know youre sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming. "

yeah so carry on the legacy! xD

Answer 2

Wow... it sounds like a poem... Hehe... To tell you honestly... I think that your mind is set to the fact that girl-boy relationship you're looking for makes you a man. And without them you feel alone or miserable. Fix yourself up first. That aura of manliness won't come out if you ain't confident on yourself or your personality. Or maybe you do too much for other people that they only see you as a friend in the first place. You sound miserable right now so i think that's the reason why relationships would be far for you right now... Do something for yourself first. No one would really want to enter a relationship with a miserable-feeling person anyway. The girls that you liked may not be the right girl for you. Maybe you also feel miserable coz your center of attention is finding a perfect girl for yourself... Why not make the perfect girl find you?

Answer 3

Reading your note, I wonder if you have been doing all these things SO THAT people would like you.


Maybe it's time to try a new tack. Forget about doing things for other people, time to start putting yourself #1. Don't count on others to make you happy - make yourself happy.

It's not being selfish - on the airplanes, they tell you to put your own oxygen mask on first, then you can help others.

Sounds like you need to take care of yourself first. When you are no longer alone and miserable, you may find your other efforts will also be better received.

Answer 4

Grow up, set boundaries and love yourself:
You are thinking small. You have to have long term goals and an aura of maturity about you if you are to attract a serious partner.
Stop being a pushover. Pushovers attract users. Users are with you satisfy a need. Once that need is provided for, they no longer need you no matter what a swell person you may be. Set limits with them give conditionally and stand up for yourself while giving.
Work from the inside out. You know yourself better than anyone ever can. If you Don’t love and respect yourself then it’s a clear signal to everyone else that there is something unlovable about you. get yourself set and then worry about the rest.

Answer 5

Sounds like every man's question..hehe Not to be flippant, but it seems so true. I know a very pretty girl who is young and pretty....her boyfriend she listens to..about to go to prison when she could have about any man she wanted. I could look at things the way you do, and I do at times, but I've decided that if things don't work out, it's okay. I'm better off alone than with a woman that will treat me like crap. Actually I had a good woman a couple of times, but I took them for granted, so it's basically my own fault. I was too picky.

If you relax and take it easy, I'm sure you will find a good woman for yourself. Good luck. You sound like a great guy.

Answer 6

Don't be upset about it, Think about what you say to people and see if from their point of view they might see you as an easy target.
especially if you are at school age people can be cruel theres probably nothing wrong with you at all the problem is with the others , they will grow up one day and think why they were so hard on you . Just try not to sound nerdish and think before you speak on what you think the reaction may be. Be cooler if you have to. but dont show your frustration. Keep smilin dude.

Answer 7

I am sure somebody out there likes you or even loves you. There are just some people who are blind, not to see the good things around them. Don't let it bother you...just keep doing the good things to others and you will see everything will come back to you.

Answer 8

dont be so depressed and pls dont say nobody like you. maybe there is someone who like you and you dont know who is that. girls, who said "get lost" to you dont deserve you dear. so, the point is leave it and take it easy. whenever someone hurts your heart just think that there is something behind that. ok. remember every tear will have a smile at end. we, as human still in learning process, every day, every minutes we learn new things. plss take it easy and let it go.i had pass this phase and trust me... everything will be fine in future but you have to be storng.good luck

Answer 9

Hey maybe your trying too hard to make things right.
Worry about yourself for a change.
Once you feel good about yourself, everything else will just happen.
You sound like a really nice person.
I wish you all the best

Answer 10

I have always felt the same way. You know what I discovered? I can't get my family to accept me and stop trying to change me so I stopped trying to give excuses and decided I am who I am and stopped appologizing. People change their attitudes towards you when you stop trying to please them. When they realize you won't be a pushover they respect you more. Right now these are just words but you will "feel" it and it won't be difficult to live it.

Answer 11

You seem to be doing good things for people, but you want reward(s) for the deeds. People see that and it turns them off. If you are going to be nice and do good things, you need to expect nothing in return - then you won't be dissappointed. You have a case of the "poor me's." So stand up off your pitty pot and go help build a house for Habitat for Humanity. Spend less money, and save more of it for emergencies. If you cannot afford to buy it, don't.