not true siblings?

Question

My toddler son and my ex boyfriends' teen are not biological siblings - proven. My son is his and the daughter, who he always believed was his - is still his, but not biologically. She only knows one Dad, he only has one daughter. Their relationship is the same as before the DNA and the daughter does not know. This Dad never married - had 2 kids from 2 different long-term relationships.
My son and 'his daughter' have a lot of contact, through their Dad. He has them both usually on the same days.
My question is, what do I tell my young son? Do I live the lie and teach him to believe that they are blood relatives or do I be straight up with him and tell the truth and in so doing cause psychological harm to the teen girl. Her mom is unaware that she has been 'caught'.
I truly want to be honest with my son. I don't want to die without my son knowing I knew. I don't want my son to think that his father was a liar,and was fooled. I don't want my son to think I was fooled.

They did not 'grow up' together, there is a 10 year difference. However, they do see each other about 2 x week. The siblings live in seperate houses with their mothers.

It's not my place to let the teen girl know. She considers my son, her brother. Do I ignore my wanting my son to know the truth?

Answer 1

If your son is a toddler, he is not going to understand the details. I would not try to explain it to him. As far as he knows, that is his sister. To try to explain the relationship in terms of "step sister" --or "not really your sister because her father is not really her father" --would only confuse him. Why would you want to do that to him? And to her?

When he is a teenager, he can be told the details if you still feel the need to tell him. And you can tell him that you did not tell him sooner out of concern for the girl. By that time, the girl may already know.

If you really want your son to know that you were not "fooled" then write it into your will. That way, he will know the truth in the event of your death.

Answer 2

The teen girl has a right to know. It sounds like you would want to know, so why don't you just tell her? If nothing else, tell your son. Not necessarily now, as he's a little young to grasp the concept, but tell him when he's old enough to understand. If you're being raised together, blood ties don't mean much in a sibling relationship. However, I think it's important to know the character of your parents.

Answer 3

My siblings are non-existant. I particularly have one that regulate into nevertheless born from the umbilical twine wrapped round her neck, yet another one that could be a a million/2 sister I in no way knew existed till my father have been given inebriated and blurted it out I particularly have one while i replace into around thirteen. That one I in basic terms observed once or twice and deliver her taking part in cards now and then for yule. And the different one is a step sister I in no way see the two, on account that she is married to a millionaire in Florida and has a existence. No time to harass me together with her cool existence. So its like they don't exist and that they are no annoyance in any respect. I prefer I had some close adequate to be stressful, yet I extra perfect pay attention what I prefer for!!! i prefer us to love one yet another, not be stressful, if I not immediately have been given some!

Answer 4

hi there i do not get what the problem really is ......if there is somthing medically there then yes tell them but just to tell them .....leave them as they are they are kids let them be that way when she is older or uyoure son was to ask....then i would still keep quiet about it ......this can cause a lot of hurt and upset you are doing nothing wrong sometimes ignorance is bliss ........and in this case i would use that sentence to the max ....take carexx

Answer 5

why would that matter, the point is they grew up together i don't think blood has anything to do with it, if the father don't care than why should you. leave it as it is. why stir up problems.