I am a fairly decent guy with a messed up past that I have been working dilligently to make up for . I always have been faithful , loyal and loving towards any woman I have been with . Now I also am an honest , hard working and spiritual guy . My motto is to be a better man today than I was yesterday . Now I really would like to meet a nice woman who would also be faithful and loyal as well . I have found it impossible and wonder why . I never had a problem getting women and making serious relationdships when I was much less concerned with others feeling and needs .
2007-03-02 16:49:20 · 16 answers · asked by cage1854 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Because they don't exist.
2007-03-02 16:54:23 · answer #1 · answered by S h ä r k G û m b ò 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You may have found a new approach to life. You might have a new sense of decency.....but your approach to meeting women might be the same.
You said that you didn't have trouble having a "serious relationship" when you didn't care about feelings or needs. What the heck kind of seriousness is that??? Do you really know what you are looking for??
Make a list of what constitutes a serious relationship. Then make a list of everything you want in a partner. What attributes does a "good woman" have? Where should you look for that woman? You can't depend on all your past experiences since they were "messed up". You need to change playmates and playgrounds if you are looking for a better grade of partner.
Take an analytical approach to this. Go against your basic instincts and try harder.
2007-03-03 01:03:32 · answer #2 · answered by Crispy_Frog 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm in the same position as you. My girlfriend who becomes my ex every week is a lying cheating person.
I think when you look for love or the type of person you want to meet, it doesn't happen. It's when you least expect it, that someone special comes along. I had some really amazing girlfriends in the past, but the timing wasn't right and I hadn't matured yet.
Might also depend on your age as well. A lot of women in my experience don't necessarily want a nice spiritual guy in their early 20s. They usually end up with total idiots and then figure it out when they are in their late 20s. My ex has been a ***** to all her nice boyfriends including me. The thing with myself is that I'm not a push over so I tell her where to go when she is rude and ungrateful. At the same time she knows she can take advantage of me and that is why I'm still around. So I'm an idiot in the end, and I've realized that I have to remove myself from this negative situation and get back to my old self.
Continue making improvements to your personal life. You will attract what you put out into the world.
2007-03-03 00:55:29 · answer #3 · answered by gotham158 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sad but true... and you're not by any means the only man who's saying this...
I hear it a lot and it's even come up a thousand times over in this forum alone.
Females today are unfortunately very self centered. They've lost their womanhood and ability to appreciate a relationship and the selflessness and compromise involved in a lasting relationship.
Everyone is so into being selfish and wanting a "free ride", which is exactly why you see so much divorce.
They expect a "good" relationship to simply and automatically just "be good" all the time. When the rough times come they aren't willng to support and honor their relationship through it. They aren't willing to "work" at anything.
This is a huge, long topic that could take forever...but I see it myself and I feel for my son's who are now old enough and one who is shortly coming of age to date.
Probably has nothing to do with you.... Believe it....
**FYI... the females in "church" are no better....so don't fool yourself into believing that b/c someone professes to be religious or attends services that they're any different.
Good Luck to you...!!
2007-03-03 01:01:32 · answer #4 · answered by ~Me~ 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It could be where you are looking for this magical woman. I've used Yahoo personals and found a very nice woman I've been dating for almost eight months now. The women that are christians list themselves that way. You can also do a search for specific characteristics(religion, non-smoker, non-drinker, etc.). You can try it for free for a short time, then it requires you pay a small monthly fee to continue. Check it out. I think it might be what you're looking for if you haven't tried it already.
2007-03-03 01:02:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
maybe you're trying too hard...good women aren't hard to find...they come in all shapes and sizes and I think thats where men often make a mistake...they think all women should be a size 6, blonde with blue eyes....and thats not the norm...
the average woman is a size 16 (now) thats 'overweight' to some. Most have brown hair and brown eyes. (thats boring to some...) Women shouldn't have to be molded into what men want...take us as we are...most of 'us' are wonderful people.
So try NOT looking so hard and not looking for Ms Perfect.
(you aren't gonna find her)...try being a friend first...then see how things go.
Good Luck !!!
2007-03-03 00:57:04 · answer #6 · answered by Chrys 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
There are many women around who will fulfill your listed desires. They may or may not come in the prettiest of packaging. Keep looking for that which may be invisible to the eye. Search with your heart.
2007-03-03 00:55:42 · answer #7 · answered by Rita 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Forming relationships begin first with our self. So, learn to love yourself, to accept yourself without judgment. After all, if you can't love yourself, who else can? If you can love and honor yourself, then you will choose only those who honor you as you honor them. Be the kind of person you would want as a friend. Then visualize what it is you want in a partner. Visualize her size, her characteristics and so forth. Form a strong mental picture of your "ideal" mate...and then think about this vision every night and every morning and even during the day. imagine yourself with her, doing the things you would like to do. Pretty soon she will appear...and will be surprisingly similar to your visualization. Don't believe me, go to
2007-03-03 00:56:52 · answer #8 · answered by judgebill 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
When you had a different lifestyle, you were probably looking for a different type of woman. Maybe you're looking in the wrong places.
2007-03-03 00:55:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
so you want to know why its so hard to find a good woman? Maybe your looking to hard and looking in all the wrong places....just relax... figure out what it is you want from a woman and what qualities you look for in a woman....stick to it...and just dont trip about it....when its meant to be that you get someone that is a good person it will happen in time.....shes out there somewhere you just have to be patient and pray about it....
2007-03-03 00:55:07 · answer #10 · answered by Tbrat 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think you are trying too hard to find someone. Focus on yourself and living a happy life and Ms. Right will come along before you know it.
2007-03-03 00:52:27 · answer #11 · answered by michellecdnd 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋