my bf rescently told me that he wasz gettin sick of us always being together and he didnt wanna hang out wit me as much anymore. He says he still loves me but what i fail to understand is that, how can you get sick of somebody you love? now i do admit, we do spend an awful amount of time together and we talk on the phone for 2-5 hrs everday so i kinda sorta understand where he's coming from. now hes kinda ignorin me do you think it will stay like this forever? i mean, where do u think he's goin with this decision? is he like gonna ignore me for a while and in like 2 weeksz everything will go back to normal? i'm so confused plsz help
2007-03-02 16:00:53 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
give him what he wants.... pretend like you dont care at all..like you dont need him..and he'll start missing you.. then he'll want to be with you more..if he really does love you.
2007-03-02 16:04:15 · answer #1 · answered by lolomgwtf 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some people have different needs. For myself, 5 hrs. on the phone is waaaay too much time, even though I may love the guy to death.
I'd rather spend that time actually BEING together doing something fun, interesting. Or just getting my hair done so I'd look cute for him when I next saw him. For himself, some basic chores and errands may not be getting done. Spending time with his family or friends may be interferred with bc he "has" to be with you. That could easily frustrate and piss off anybody.
For some people there is such a thing as "too much togetherness" and they may need a little "me" time, quiet time, time with others to recharge.
So, excessive amounts of time on the phone is just that--EXCESSIVE. And 5 hours fits that bill. When do you sleep, go to work, get the laundry done, go to school, eat?????
He may need to come up for air. Let him breathe, don't smother him if he's not the "smothering" type.
You definitely need to find a new "normal" vs. waiting for the relationship, and him, to get back to the "old" normal you're used to of being together in some way constantly.
If you can't or won't make a new normal with him, then kiss him goodbye, as you'll be seen as clingy, selfish, demanding, controlling, immature, overly dependent, too needy, etc., and that assessment would be...
...about right.
2007-03-02 16:23:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy, he sure chose a bad choice of words. Has he always thought the two of you spent too much time together? Did he initiate most of this time together or did he feel pressured to spend this much time with you? If he initiated it and now he doesn't want to spend as much time with you then I would be prone to think he is thinking about calling it quits. If you pretty much demanded he spend so much time with you then he is feeling choked. He asked for space so give it to him. Let him call you. Ask him what he wants to do with his time. Maybe he needs more time for sports, clubs, or a hobby. He may miss being with his friends. If you talk to him without getting upset or accusing him he will more than likely open up and be truthful. Hope this helps.
2007-03-02 16:13:06 · answer #3 · answered by Im Listening 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You two were obviously overdoing it, so give him space till he calls and work out something more reasonable. Talking 2 - 5 hours is just such a waste of time unless you do it every month, but daily it's silly. Thats 10 - 25 hours a week you can be doing something productive.
2007-03-02 16:06:52 · answer #4 · answered by Nort 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's getting bored and starting to move on. Don't think that this will get any better. He's probally looking for other girls during the times when he's not with you now. I side with you when you say how can someone who loves you get sick of you. When someone loves you they want to spend all their extra time with you. Guys do need some time to hang out with their guy friends, but he straight out told you that he's getting sick of spending so much time with you. Either be way too busy for him now and see how he acts or dump him all together. It sounds like he's just keeping you around so he has someone when hes bored or when he wants to get some. Dump him, find someone who wants to give all his attention to you.
2007-03-02 16:09:31 · answer #5 · answered by juniper 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
boys will boys...men need their space and lots of it, its hard to find a guy who even wants a girlfriend so your already a step ahead of other people. now you guys spent probably too much time together its ok for the first week...what they call the honeymoon phase.. but after that try to limit the time you spend with him keep him interested make him wait make him call you make him take u out...no things will not change at this point he probably is tired of seeing u and because he loves u he's trying to get a little bit of space just give him space let him call u even though it'll probably be hard to get used to but thas what love is about you have to sacrafice ...good luck
2007-03-02 16:09:31 · answer #6 · answered by miss t 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't play games. Don't pretend to feel like it doesn't bother you if it really does. Try to be more independent though for your own sake not just for his. Having a life outside of him is healthy and absolutely necessary. If he keeps it up and still doesn't want to spend time with you even if it's less often... it's probably time to let him go and find someone that cherishes the time you spend together.
2007-03-02 16:09:16 · answer #7 · answered by Cait 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think guys like to work for stuff sometimes. they dont want their girlfriend to have no other friends that she can just drop everything to hang out with him. my bf told me this one time and I had to learn it the hard way. if you are very jealous and/or always want to be with him he will get tired of it because he doesn't think he can do anything without you being there. you can love someone but "space makes the heart grow fonder"...when you are always with them they dont have a chance to ever miss you and that can lead to taking the person for granted. Dont take it personally, try to stay busy or start hanging out with your friends more, maybe dont answer a call from him every once in a while...at first he probably had to work for your attention but now he doesn't so just make it seem like you dont NEED him there, u have things to do besides be with him, etc and hopefully that can fix things
2007-03-02 16:06:22 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no, he probably won't go back to normal and he's probably saying that because he doesn't want to spend that much time on the phone, which can be a lot. take it slow, but don't be clingy. with guys, most times we want what we can't have and we don't want what is always around, lol. just play it cool, be good to him and expect the from him. and if he starts straying away or whatever, act like you don't care, make no fuss, and move on. it'll probably drive him nuts.
2007-03-02 16:08:07 · answer #9 · answered by Josh M 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok...it is possible to sick of someone that you love. Think about family! BUT...yes, there is a but...if he is ignoring you then he is more than just sick of you. he is trying to end the two of you in a nice way. don't allow yourself to be ignored. It is time for you to step away and allow him to get in contact with you. This is a way to examine his feelings. If he doesn't contact you then you have to move on.
2007-03-02 16:11:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it won't be like this forever. just give it time. you both need to learn how to balance your time with eachother while also doing other things such as working or going to school. it sucks, i've been through it, and we're still together and we're still in love. Good luck and don't dwell on it. Be even happier when you DO get to spend time with him.
2007-03-02 16:04:34 · answer #11 · answered by _hopefull_ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋