I recently became the lickiest man in the world. My girlfriend is the kindest smartest, most loving and as a big bonus extremely gorgeous. Well yesterday she told me she has begun to really fall in love with me but she is afraid because everybody before has treated he very badly. She has said that she knows she can trust me and she can. I also let her know daily that I too have fallen in love with her. I need to find a way to show her or prove to her that she can let go of the edge and fall safely for I will catch her. I know that many guys say the same things but I am not one who falls in love at the drop of a hat. I have been divorced for almost 15 years now and can honestly say this is the first time I have ever used the words I LOVE YOU!!! Please help there must be a way....
2007-03-02 13:02:36 · 13 answers · asked by John N 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I am much like your girlfriend. I am sorry to tell you this, but she has a hard road ahead of her. This is going to take some time. Be there for her and listen to her if and when she is ready to talk. She has been through so much in that past that she needs reassurance that her future will not be the same. One day, she will go through a stressful time--be there for her--catch her when she is falling. One day, someone may treat her awful--be there and show her by your actions that you are there catching her time and time again. I have been in multiple abusive relationships and until I actually SAW someone catch me when I'm falling NO MATTER WHAT, I couldn't believe it. Remind her that you are there. Never stop telling her that. Remind yourself that this CAN and WILL change. It takes time. Take it one day at a time. Treat her like a queen and show her that she deserves to be treated like that because to you, she IS a queen. I understand what is going through her head. Seriously, if you need a friend that's been through stuff before, please, email me through yahoo answers. I will be happy to listen to you.
Amanda
2007-03-02 13:13:39 · answer #1 · answered by One Odd Duck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is going to have to decide when to let go of her fears. If a woman is treated bad in a past relationship carry their experiences forward with them. Just being there for her and learning what the others did wrong helps. Its not your fault that she has reservations on the relationship due to the past, but only someone who loves does not get angered at her problems. Its a good start that you are seeking advice rather than getting angry. Time is the biggest healer of anything. She will let go, just show your love to her. Small gifts out of nowhere are nice and treat her like she's an angel. You can't force her. She has to resolve the battle inside her to be able to open up toward you.
2007-03-02 21:18:15 · answer #2 · answered by anglett5 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not the words that are important but deeds. Say 'I love you' to her with the way you treat her every day. And she will believe you more than any words you can say to her.
Trust takes time and daily experience to develop. And all you have to do is make sure that her experience with you is good, real good.
2007-03-02 21:11:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you've been dating her for a long time, you could try proposing to her, or better yet, buy her a promise ring and promise to be there for her whenever she may need it and that you'll always treat her well.
Another way to prove you'll treat her right, is make sure you're there for her in her desperate time of need. Have patients, it'll come soon enough
2007-03-02 21:08:15 · answer #4 · answered by toronto_leafs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's hard because her previous relationships have left a scar just be understanding and continue to love her it's more of a mind set so there is nothing you can do extra just keep doing what you are doing and she will come around
2007-03-02 21:09:32 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be pushy and she will continue to melt into you! Love is truth in action...One can say truth is the lock and love is the key or love is the lock and truth is the key! Either way...just be yourself and enjoy each-other.
2007-03-02 21:09:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her a 10lb chocolate bar, and tell her what you just took 45 minutes to type up. A store called TRADER JOE'S sells 10lb chocolate bars. Milk chocolate and dark.
2007-03-02 21:07:37 · answer #7 · answered by freaky nerd loser 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her it's time to make new memories....i did the smae thing with my new girl she had had some issues with sex and i took it real real real slow and told her to replace the old memoriees with new ones about me! she is now deeply in love and well it couldnt have been better 3years tomorrow
2007-03-02 21:10:19 · answer #8 · answered by Metalup87 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just say the same thing you just said here to her...she will absolutely fall in love with it as well as falling even deeper in love with you!
2007-03-02 21:07:53 · answer #9 · answered by M R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's a big matzo ball out there for her,
she sounds like a sico, be care full she may be the one your father warned you about.
that's not love,
lust give it a shake
2007-03-02 21:11:00 · answer #10 · answered by t-bone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋