So, about a month ago we decided we want to really start planning our wedding. We decided for Oct of this year. 8 months or so away. Well we were talking about everything and so excited but recently he's stopped talking about it. I hate to bring it up all the time because I dont want to make him stop talking about it even more. I just really want it to be in Oct but I feel if we keep waiting to make plans than we aren't going to be able to get the church and the place we want. Does anyone have any advice? I tell myself I'll wait another month and if nothing happens than I'm just gonna forget it.
2007-03-02 11:28:22 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I haven't taken time to read the other comments to see if I am being redundant but, find the most opportune time to make sure that the Oct. wedding is what your fiance is wanting. If so, go forward with plans. It is important for brides to know that it is rare that the groom-to-be will be as excited about the color of napkins, the type of flowers purchased, and/or wedding favors as the bride. If he suggests putting the wedding off a few more months and is serious about it, still go forth with wedding plans and only provide him with the most important details--time, location, tux appointment, honeymoon requests, type of food served, etc.
2007-03-02 12:07:55 · answer #1 · answered by theplanningdiva 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit down and ask him what he would like to have happen concerning the wedding. Ask is there anything he really does NOT want to happen at the wedding. Later on tell him when and where to go.
Men do not do wedding planning not the way we want to do and they don't much care. So after the courtesy of asking for his imput, you and your mom or girls or whatever you go out and plan your wedding and get what you want. He is gonna go with whatever you pick anyway so save the stress and drama. men have no taste anyway so consider youself free to do what yo want. They never do but should he make any complaint you smile your sweetest and remind him how he did not want to be involved
At least he was participating. He probably has had enough this is not really a guy thing. I know you want him involved but face it honey, he just ain't that kinda guy, most of 'em aren't.
2007-03-02 11:37:29 · answer #2 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is the planning he isn't really into, then just take it upon yourself to do it yourself, and make a list of the things that you really need him to help you decide on. Like, I basically planned everything, and then went through it with him and asked if he wanted anything changed or added. He picked one more song, and was content to let me scheme the rest of the details. It's a guy thing.
On the other hand, if it's the WEDDING he isn't into, then you need to put off getting married until you both feel ready for marriage. You said a month ago you decided to really start planning. But you should talk to him more and make sure he really wants to get married in October. If not, set the date for another year from now or something. He may just need time to think of himself as married and get used to the idea.
Either way, it has to be a topic of conversation between the two of you, and then once you figure out what it is he wants, you'll both feel better about it. It may be that he is just tired of talking about it. I know my sis-in-law-to-be is obsessed about her wedding to my brother, and that's about all she can talk about. It's understandable, and quite palatable for me to listen to, but sometimes guys get bored with the details we girls love to gush about.
From the sound of it ("I just really want it to be in Oct...") you are the one who really wants to get married. He's just going along with it because he doesn't want to lose you. If I were you I wouldn't push him into it. But take my advice, and all the others, and then do what you think is best. You know the situation better than we do, so follow your own intuition. But that's just how it sounds to me. Good luck, and congratulations. Wedding planning can be SO MUCH FUN!!!!! Just make sure you're both ready for it, or it can be miserable.
2007-03-02 11:46:50 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men don't really pay attention to the details, it's just the way it is. Mostly they allow the women to take charge and have the wedding the way the bride wants it, since that's what they want to do, let the bride have her choice and be happy with it.
Most guys will only be supportive on how much to spend, how many people, and where to go for the honeymoon.
I say don't hassle him much, and as long as you guys have decided on where it will be and the basics, just take charge, and remember the most important things is, the marriage, NOT the wedding.
2007-03-02 11:36:01 · answer #4 · answered by grldragon101 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alot of guys I know drastically under estimate the amount of planning that needs to go into a wedding. Maybe he feels it shouldnt be that hard to plan so he doesnt understand why you need to tlak about it all the time.
Sit him down and be open with him about how far in advance places and vendros get booked and teh longer you wait to more it may cost as well due to rushed bookings.
If he just doesnt want to tlak about it in general then he may be doing it on purpose to continue pushing back the date. Possibly he isn't ready for marriage and is now realizing it. Eitehr way address your concerns with him.
2007-03-02 11:37:42 · answer #5 · answered by Jessica S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit down and talk to your guy to be sure he's ready for a wedding in october - I know when my fiance and I started planning our wedding he was at first all into it and then for a while he didn't want to talk about it much but now he's back to being excited and taking part in the planning
2007-03-02 11:33:43 · answer #6 · answered by Angelina 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't have a definite date, that is a huge problem. Don't wait another month. If you two cannot choose a date, that's just a huge red flag. Maybe he asked you to marry him just to keep you quiet....
2007-03-03 00:08:11 · answer #7 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its probly just nerves! i mean, if i were getting married, id be scared and wanna hold off until the last second too!
Happy Wedding!
xoxoBabiiBrownie818
2007-03-02 11:36:51 · answer #8 · answered by babiibrownie818 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋