My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half and we pretty much moved into together a week after dating. And things were great for a long time. But recently all the problems that I would just brush aside just won't stay back now. I won't get into details about them, because overall it just made me fall out of love with him. I still care about him and don't want to hurt him, he's a good guy. He hasn't done anything wrong, I just don't feel for him like that anymore. But since we've been practically married this whole time, I'm too much of a coward to actually confront him. I've always been deathly afraid of confrontaion. Especially since I'm pretty much flushing down what WE have built our lives to be for over a year. Not only will I be changing how I live life, but how he will live his (bills, living situation, etc). I don't know how to do this, or when! I just don't think I can do this :(
2007-03-02 08:20:07 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i know how you feel and in a word it is called "stuck"! I was there once myself, and believe me , you are not going to be happy if you stay. You're feeling sorry for him. But, don't you feel sorry for yourself too? Sweety, you've got to feel sorry for yourself first. He survived just fine before you were in the picture, and he'll be just fine when you're not! You say his life will change so much, but, what about yours? You'll have your own lifestyle changes too! I think you're just afraid of hurting someone else because you know how it feels. It sounds to me like you're too good-hearted for your own good. I know cause I'm the same way! And that has helped me and hurt me. Think about how miserable you are right now! Is that how you want to spend the rest of your life? Also, remember how good it felt when you guys first fell in love! Don't you wanna feel that again? I know I do someday! But, Sweety, you're not gonna feel any of that if you remain where you're at. Can you live with that? Good luck,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, kathy
2007-03-02 08:34:11 · answer #1 · answered by kathy l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him and at least if he doesn't already know give him a hint of what's going on. Let this stew for a week and then, tell him it's not meant to be because you want something different for your life. Tell him you think he's a great guy who will have no trouble finding another girl, but you know you have to go your own way now.
Five minutes after you move/ he moves out, snap your fingers and realize you're over him. This is what women are often excellent at when it's their idea to move on. Good Luck in this difficult situation.
2007-03-02 16:36:02 · answer #2 · answered by Heywood J Helpaguy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is just best to tell him the truth.
The problem is that you rushed into the relationship too fast. It has stalled because there was little or no common ground. A relationship that was never given the chance to breathe will suffocate, which is what has happened. It is not fair to him, or to you to continue on with something that is no longer there.
As much of a coward as you feel you are now, imagine waiting another year...even harder. Good luck.
2007-03-02 16:29:08 · answer #3 · answered by BrokenOpalAngel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't stay unhappy. Sooner or later you'll have to tell him. But if you part as friends then hopefully you can work something out about the bills and all that lovely stuff.
2007-03-02 16:24:23 · answer #4 · answered by SHELLBELL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say before u break up with him
approach him on the issue u have been holding in
and try to work on it
who knows u might rekindle ur old flames if he improves
dont give up with out trying
u smell me
2007-03-02 16:24:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you're too chicken to be straight up, then make a plan and pack up all your stuff on the sly and split. nonconfrontational people are usually pretty good at sneakiness.
2007-03-02 16:23:28 · answer #6 · answered by Stevie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
theres no easy way,just sit down with him and explain ur feelings and be honest the longer u put it off the harder its going to be and more hurt to both of u...gl girl u gotta do it..
2007-03-02 16:24:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just do what my fiancee did - pack up and move out and hook up with someone else.
2007-03-02 16:23:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
do it the way a guy would dump a girl just.. just DO IT!
2007-03-02 16:23:34 · answer #9 · answered by west side rider 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't do it, because you don't want to yet. When you want to, you will.
2007-03-02 16:23:01 · answer #10 · answered by Java Queen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋