My fiancee was talking to me on the phone and overheard the secretary ask me to cover the phones while she got a drink. I answered " Sure babe, no problem". I am a southern gentleman and I mean no disrespect, it is just the was I was raised to be polite and helpful. My fiancee hung up on me when I gave the phone to the secretary for her to explain that it did not bother her. Is my fiancee being too sensitive or am I just out of the loop about what is acceptable?? Men and Women both answer please!
2007-03-02 06:35:19 · 26 answers · asked by J H 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
even though your lady was upset that you called your secretary "babe" you should NOT have handed the phone over to her!!! Your lady should not have let it get to her if she knows that's the way you are, I think she was more pissed that you handed over the phone, its kinda like rubbing it in her face....Make sense?
2007-03-02 06:45:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, from my point of view, calling 'babe' to someone who is not related to you, in your case a co-worker, is not appropiate. & I understand your girlfriend's reaction. I wouldn't want my bf to call someone else 'babe' or honey, sweety. Talk to her and explain that you were just being polite, if she likes you she will understand and probably laugh a little for the confusion,...I would. After all, who wouldn't want a polite, respectful gentleman as a boyfriend. OH, BUT DON'T DO IT AGAIN. Good luck
2007-03-02 14:46:03 · answer #2 · answered by BeckhamGirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no your wife is being to sensitive thats is just being a gentleman you need to talk to your wife about the whole thing and tell her that that is just the way you were rasied as long as you dont go over the hill like when you call your secretary babe dont say it with love do you know what i mean cause thats a different story say it with kindness and friendlyness thats all you have to do! Glad I Can Help!
2007-03-02 14:44:08 · answer #3 · answered by Samantha R 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, have a heart to heart talk to with your fiance to find out why it bothers her. (Personally, I do not like it when my husband talks to his staff like that. One, since he is a supervisor, professionally it may be taken as sexaul harrasment. Two, it may lead to some thing more & I am a jealous person.)
Two, I understand that is easy for us to do that when we interact with the same people on a daily basis for hours at a time. Our company is runned byonly four people. The owners who are married are two of them. We are all married and I am the cousin of one of the owners. The only other person is a male agent we have who we have embraced as a family member. His wife frequently stops by the office. It is understood that when we talk to each other with such words as...sweetheart, my love, and other words of affections in spanish...that there is nothing there except mutual respect and appreciation for one another.
If this is the case in your situation, take time to explain that to your fiance. Maybe after she meets you co-workers, she may feel more comfortable with your nicknames.
Explain to her if you want your relationship to work and take her feeling into consideration. Maybe you might have to avoid using those nicknames when she is around to avoid upsetting her.
Good luck...Remember communication is one of the most important things in any relationship.
2007-03-02 14:59:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Southern Gentleman, here, Sir! (Atlanta) But I'm Old School. We do it, like this! To address a Lady, with anything but Ma'am? Or her name? Is disrespectful. Unless, first? She calls you out, in some fashion. Then, it's usually excepted that she is giving you permission to do the same to her. Fair enough?
2007-03-02 14:42:28 · answer #5 · answered by Goggles 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dude, on the job you can't call a Native-American "chief". You can't call a Latino "Speedy Gonzales" or Mexican. You can't relate any joke with any off-color to it around any women-folk. I know, I've seen it. The security guard picks up your ID when you try to re-enter the building after lunch. You go home muttering WTF???? And, that might be a larger corporation, but the new job place is strictly a masquerade with Sensitivity Training accomplished and practiced.
About as sexist as I'd get is calling them "cowgirl".
2007-03-02 14:46:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many woman think it's insulting. Calling your secretary "babe" doesn't exactly sound professional. Calling her by her first name would be much more gentlemanly.
But your fiancee was rude when she hung up on the secretary.
2007-03-02 14:41:01 · answer #7 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Sure if its out of respect... But if you have a girlfriend that would not be very appropriate because I as a girlfriend would be very very upset if my man called someone else babe, its because I am HIS BABE!!! etc! It's just that is how I feel, and alot of girls might agree with me!!
2007-03-02 14:44:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If that is your personality then its not a problem. I know many that do that, and I think its just who they are. They arent real consious of it. Its not a flirt thing either when thats just your nature. You may want to becareful around your gf but she should understand also. Everyone needs to see both sides!
2007-03-02 14:44:04 · answer #9 · answered by beaches 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Depends. Many women resent the implied put-out and inappropriate familiarity of throwing these terms around.
2007-03-02 14:41:46 · answer #10 · answered by ElOsoBravo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋