So I am in love with my BF of 1 year and we he loves me as well. We just argue so much. I feel like I have to walk on egg shells. When we do argue he calls me a bi***h and the Shut the F up and calls me stupid all the time. I explain to him how this effects me and then he will cry cause he feels bad. But he always slips up and does the exact same thing when we argue. I love him deeply and I hate when we argue. Its alwasy over somethign stupid. He is so abusive verbal wise. Why does he do this? I am afraid ill end up falling outa love with him. I think he has a split personality. He has a real short temper. ugh..... what do I do?
2007-03-02 05:55:57 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I was married to someone like this and it's a really bad situation to be in. You should leave him now before you get any more involved. He will eventually lose his temper and yell at you in public and it could even get physical. I know it's really hard to leave someone you love but honestly it's for the best. After I left my husband I realized how nice life is without having someone screaming at me all the time. I found a nice bf and we've been together 3 years and never had a fight and he's never yelled at me.
2007-03-02 06:01:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Regardless of whether or not you two stay together, he should probably seek some counseling for his temper and such. If he is constantly 'slipping up' and verbally abusing you, you shouldn't put up with it. If it goes on too long, eventually you'll start to believe it's what you deserve when you really don't deserve it. It's important to the well-being of both of you to try and work things out soon. Things like this can be much more damaging long-term, than they seem.
I was in a physically abusive relationship where the same sort of things would happen. I was certain that he was truly apologetic, and that he really did care, and I thought I cared about him so much....it took me a long time to realize that I didn't deserve that, even once...And that he didn't care enough, had too many issues, and did too much damage for us to ever get past it all.
Really, what I'm saying is, that you need to take a look at yourself and your situation and determine what it is that you want and deserve, what you need (and don't need!), and move forward from there. Oh, also, there are plenty of other people out there who will love you as much, or more, as you love them.
2007-03-02 06:14:04 · answer #2 · answered by Kat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is abusive and unfortunately will always be. What you are describing the a perfect example of the cycle of abuse.
No matter how much you think you love him, you will do best to end the relationship. He is now verbally abusive, but that is always how it starts. In time it will become physical. Do not believe that he will never do that. Every abuser is a textbook case. They all follow the same basic pattern. It may take some a bit longer to become physical, but they all become physical.
Get out now before it gets bad. I can tell you this from my wife's own experience. She lived with an abuser for 19 years before I met her. He started out exactly like your boyfriend and my wife ended the relationship by running for her life after he gave her two black eyes. If she had not ducked, I may never have been able to say today that she is my wife.
Take care,
Troy
2007-03-02 06:06:02 · answer #3 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell him how you feel about this when he is in a good mood. Be honest but firm. He has no right to speak to you like he is a 2 yr old child throwing a fit! And you need to open your eyes and realize you deserve better. Don't stay much longer if things don't change. It might just be verbal abusive now but it leads to physical next!
2007-03-02 06:12:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to break it to you, honey, but if he really loved you, he wouldn't be abusive to you. He may regret his words, but not enough to actually stop doing them. He just doesn't love you enough to control his temper.
Tell him that you love him, but for both your sakes you can't be with him until he deals with his anger issues, and possible dissociative disorder. Encourage him to seek counseling, therapy, etc. Make it clear that you are broken up until he can prove that he has matured, and that this abusive behavior won't be tolerated ever again.
2007-03-02 06:08:33 · answer #5 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its all about respect in a relationship. He's not showing you any. Verbal abuse doesn't go away it just gets worse ! Run away now before this goes any further.
2007-03-02 06:02:12 · answer #6 · answered by WhyY 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
rigidity makes you smash out greater, have confidence me i'm having the comparable problem because of the fact college is arising! Wash your face with zits face wash, it's going to help stop a number of the breakouts.
2016-09-30 02:51:31 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him it hurts your feelings and ask him to get help.
But don't put up with the abuse.
2007-03-02 05:59:36 · answer #8 · answered by Moon Crystal 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
move on. it's not gonna get any better, trust me. he probably learned it watching the way his dad treats his mom or vice versa.
2007-03-02 06:00:34 · answer #9 · answered by Vol_Fan 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
HE ACT MORE LIKE A MAN.. IT OKAY TO GET F*8K BY HIM...BY THE WAY ,YOU ARE HIS GIRL LET HIM BEHAVE LIKE YOUR MAN...HE LOVES YOU
2007-03-02 06:03:28 · answer #10 · answered by the_road_i_am_on 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋