I have been seeing someone for over a month and he really seems to like me, I like him, too. We both got out of relationships 6 months ago. So, I know I am a bit afraid to start something new... I feel that he may, too. However I don't want to just have a "thing" without meaning. Tempting to just tell him that it is over just because I am afraid to be hurt... Although I can't just end it. He has been good to me and I have never had that! We get along so well. I don't know what to do. I have been hurt so much by the bad guys before.... Now, I suppose what scares me the most is being hurt by a good guy. If you can help I will be very greatfull!
2007-03-02 00:58:33 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No offense, but read all the questions on here asking where the good guys are and I think you'll see you're hardly alone. It is only too bad that, from what I can tell, girls who go for the bad boys , do so until they do get hurt and then they are afraid to let it happen again. Look, a good relationship is predicated on trust and personal sacrifice. What simpler but more meaningful sacrifice could anyone make than to trust parts of themselves (and maybe all of themselves eventually) to someone else. It takes time and practice, but I can tell you are genuinely interested in this guy, so I say stick with it. You're not getting married tomorrow or next week, so just enjoy the ride and see where it takes you.
2007-03-02 01:08:53 · answer #1 · answered by randyken 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is all about taking chances. Give this relationship some more time. You get along well and he's good to you, are your afraid of being hurt again but this will always be an issue in your life till you end up with someone for good.
Just enjoy being treated well you deserve that and more. Let your heart be your guide, think positive thoughts and most of all have fun!!!
2007-03-02 01:11:22 · answer #2 · answered by cream city chick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ally,
First, congrats on your new relationship. It sounds like you are really enjoying being with the "good guy" for a change. I'm happy that you have found someone who treats you well. We all deserve to be treated with love and respect by those we are with.
Having said that, what makes you think your "good guy" will stop treating you well and suddenly hurt you? Is it because you have been hurt in the past by "bad guys." If so, I think you are jumping to a conclusion about your new "good guy" that isn't really fair to him or you. After all, he wasn't the one that hurt you.
My advice would be to just relax and enjoy the relationship for what it is, a good relationship with someone who treats you well. Don't push the issue of where you stand with him just yet. You have only been together a little over a month. By virtue of the fact that he is treating you well he IS telling you in his own little way that he likes you and enjoys being with you. Slow down and give it time. If your relationship with this good guy is really meant to be, it will work out. If, as you say, you "really like him," let him know, either through the way you treat him in return or by just whispering it in his ear. It might just be the boost of confidence that he needs to come out and tell you that he likes or maybe even loves you. Guys love that, and most can't resist responding in kind.
Best of luck!
2007-03-02 01:13:26 · answer #3 · answered by Colonel Angus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you heart has many battle scars............women usually select a new boyfriend that has the same characteristics of the former boyfriend.....Why?? Because that is all they know.....So, when a man comes around that does not fit the mold of what she is use to.....There is doubt in her mind....she thinks what is up with this guy?? She thinks he will dumb me.....after all how can I be good enough for him?
A month is not long enough to move to the next level.....Enjoy his company for now. See how he treats you for a few months .......he may just be putting his best foot forward to win you over. Or not...... time will tell.... you will know in a few months what kind of man he is......in the mean time enjoy the dates.
I suggest that you read a few self help books on self esteem.
2007-03-02 01:30:28 · answer #4 · answered by Pearlinpc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you like him don't break up with him because you are scared that's just something that we all feel...I am scared of my bf breaking up with me and hurting me but at the same time i love him and i know that if everything he says is true which i think it is then i have nothing to worry about...And if the guy is treating you right why get rid of him????? Just ask him how he feels there is nothing wrong with wanting to know where you stand!
2007-03-02 01:04:59 · answer #5 · answered by HelpMe123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To have a meaningful, healthy relationship...you can't drag your old relationship baggage in with you to the new. If you're so afraid, you may not be ready and should work on bettering yourself, alone. If you really want this to work, you need to sit down and talk about what you are feeling. It all comes down to communication. If you can't communicate what you're thinking and feeling, it won't last.
2007-03-02 01:06:35 · answer #6 · answered by freckles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't rush it, just go with the flow it takes a long time before you get to know a person. Just remeber to ask lots of a questions.
2007-03-02 01:08:59 · answer #7 · answered by Babe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are afraid of him leaving, so you're contemplating leaving first so you don't get hurt?? That's wrong. You should enjoy your guy, get to know him, a month is not enough time. Relax and don't rush it.
2007-03-02 01:04:06 · answer #8 · answered by Jewel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i understand ur situation babe. my suggestion is try and ask him if he really still loves you and what does the relationship means to him. if his response is very positive then you know u are dealing wit a guy dat truly care abt out you. but if his response is otherwise mail me to gist me. am very interested in helping you thru
salako.sunday@yahoo.co.uk
2007-03-02 01:11:00 · answer #9 · answered by The AnswerMan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't ever ask him that. Questions like that are intensely annoying.
2007-03-02 01:09:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋