I'm this kind of guy who grew up in a family who likes to buy things for people. I like buying stuff for someone who I care, especially for my girlfriend. My girlfriend smokes, one time she wanted me to get a pack of cigerattes for her, instead I bought a whole carton for her instead. I didn't mind, I love doing things for her like that when I got the money. Today she wanted me to get a pack of cigerattes for her, i didn't mind and I got her some. But somehow, just awhile ago she called me and asked if i would let her borrow some money to get some girl scouts cookies (She's broke now, but payday is tomorrow). She talked to me like I was all sexy and all loveable and everything. I don't know why, but somehow it made me feel like she was using me. Like all she does is use me for my money. Before, i didn't mind, but somehow it made me feel wierd. Is it just me, or do you think she uses me for my money? Need some advise. Do you think, as boyfriend, that should keep on buying stuff for her
2007-03-01 16:49:12 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sound like you have being use.
Wake up please.
Someday you'll realize live is just not to give but also to take, bet your family miss to teach you that.
2007-03-01 16:53:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its really nice of you to buy things for her but don't let it get to her head. If she asks for a pack of cigarettes get her a pack, not a case! lol It's nice for her to have someone like you to do such nice things for her but I don't think she should be asking for $ to buy cookies of all things!! The cookies will still be available when she has her own $ to spend! I am like you, I always buy things for my boyfriend because that's just what I like to do and fortunatley I can afford to do that where he can't always. Just do nice things for her as they come to mind but not so often that she thinks this is some regular thing like she doesn't have to pay for anything. In a steady long term relationship it is normal for each person to buy things for each other and pay for things together. Make sure that you are getting back what you are giving- and I don't mean necisarily fincancially but by her showing her appreciation just by really sincerely thanking you and doing other nice things like cooking you a nice dinner or something, and if she can afford it she should buy you something once in a while. I totally understand how you feel though, sometimes it's hard to always give and hardly ever receive. My advice is to just keep the buying at a level you are comfortable with but don't totally spoil her if you are feeling used. Good luck, I hope it works out for you .
2007-03-01 16:57:02 · answer #2 · answered by aly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love buying things for my love. But when your gut tells you its going too far, then watch for red flags.
But I really think she was just broke and wanted Girl Scout cookies and payday isn't til tomorrow. See if she pays you back. If she does, she's a keeper.
Oh one more thing, when my guy gives me money to run out and get dinner I always bring him the change. Does she?
2007-03-01 16:54:47 · answer #3 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try refusing to give her money one time. If she still loves you just as much, she is not using you. If she pulls an attitude and acts mad, then she is using you. She doesn't sound like the most unselfish girl to me. She is going out with you either because you are really hot, you give her a lot of stuff, you're really smart, or because she genuinely likes you (but it doesn't sound like it).
2007-03-01 16:55:24 · answer #4 · answered by Kaitlyn J 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok sir, here it is..from what u described ..no. i wouldnt assume you're being used..HOWEVER..you yourself have materialized this relationship, unfortunately, and sorry to inform you..but you basing a good deal of your relationship with this girl on gifts although they are well meant and innocent enough,has set yourself up to be used for the same..ive been in relationships of all sorts (mentally speaking) and the best ones, ive found are when you both have nothing, and are out to get nothing, but the pleasure of each others company
2007-03-01 17:10:25 · answer #5 · answered by paul_maul_100s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said you feel like she is using you. The best advice is to follow your stomach. If you have that nauseous feeling in your stomach that something is wrong, usually it is. Slow down, stop spending and see how she acts. Move forward slowly with her.
2007-03-01 16:55:54 · answer #6 · answered by XOXOXOXO 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sure sounds like a user and you sound like a sucker. See how sweet she is when you stop buying her things. You might learn something.
2007-03-01 16:52:09 · answer #7 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
giving your gf lung cancer thats soooooooooo romantic.
you dont need to buy peoples love,if you realise your own worth.
2007-03-01 20:14:15 · answer #8 · answered by rusalka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
buy her some stuff that you want for her but whats wrong there is she's the one choosing what you should buy for her.. it should be your choice not hers..
2007-03-01 16:55:38 · answer #9 · answered by heartbeats_tin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be happy to buy stuff for your girlfriend. What size is she? Does she like lingerie? Please advise.
2007-03-01 16:51:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋