does anybody know the best treatment for inner rage towards people and poor impulse control?

Question

im 29 and have recently been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. ive never been able to make or maintain relashionships with anyone, ive suffered tremendously in life and today live a very lonely existance. only people i have close to me in my life and are sticking by me, is my mum. the relashionship ive had on the net with a girl from canada for two years is on the verge of breaking down to, because of my constant low moods, possessiveness and insecurities with her, ive begun to feel clingy towards her, and have felt an emptiness and despair when shes not online. ive been having arguments just recently with her regaurding her faithfullness and commitment to me. as i feel wwe did establish a loving relashionship. but i kept asking her for reassurance does she love me..i would cause arguments with her, because she puts pictures of other guys on msn messenger, and she says shes still single on myspace..this time i fear she wont be coming back to me,like she has in the past..

i fear this illness is beating me, and i fear i might of lost the love of a girl i really did love this time. because of my moods, insecurities, low self esteem, and possessivness...im wondering whether i can beat this disorder. as im getting older now, its a hard disorder to treat, so ive herard..and my hopes and dreams feel to far away to achieve them...im gutted over this girl..what can i do? shes 20 but i loved her

please only answer this if your gonig to give a sensible dignified answer otherwise dont bother

Answer 1

I don't know the "best" treatment for inner rage towards people and poor impulse control, but I can tell you I suffered the same, sought psychiatric help, received therapy and medication for three years, and am now a person who is more "in control" of their life.

My "introverted" personality excludes me from developing close relationships even within my family, even though I long for a "personal" attachment to a "special" person.

I would suggest you seek professional counseling, therapy, or psychiatric help. My first encounter with counseling was at the age of 24 with a psychologist who basically told me to "suck it up". My last was at the age of 55 with a psychiatrist who diagnosed me with severe depression, anxiety, and homicidal tendencies, and put me on medication.

Three years of medication definitely improved my outlook on life, alleviated my rage, and lessened my poor impulse control. Is there a possiblity that I will again become a danger to those around me? Yes; but, I now recognize that danger, and know that I must seek help when the "bull" rages again.

Answer 2

I have read your other question also,,, so do read that one as well

This is one of many situations we find ourselves in if we suffer with personality/anxiety and depression. It will effect every aspect of your life.

29 years old...

if you want to improve your life in all areas you have to get back to the docs and ask for some medication if life is feeling hopeless. This will improve your outlook on life and then on yourself.

don't trust the feelings you are having at the moment,,, there is a medical reason as to why you are feeling like this.

Ask this girl to wipe the slate clean,,,"can we start again?"... tell her you know you have been hard to live with and you are going to the doctors to do something about it. And make her this promise.

No more putting up with this ****!

Start taking this seriously now..it's up to you to do something about it now,,, and i promise you this time next year you will look back and realise the vast improvement. You might be with someone you may have a life of great stuff.

The disorders you describe, can hinder, even destroy, your potential to be the person you were ment to be!

Give yourself a chance, get down the docs..please make that bloody call now. I know it can be hard finding the 'want' to do these things, but you must!
x

Answer 3

When I was diagnosed with re-active repetitive clinical depression, I don't know what was worse, the illness or the diagnosis,it relay knocked me off my feet, Some Doctor was telling me that I was mentally ill and I would be that way for the rest of my life and the only remedy according to him was to be wrapped up in cotton wool for the rest of my natural!! Chance would have been a good thing, anyway that was the start of a long journey, did I ignore the doctor or accept what he said and work on it. I chose the latter, that was about 5 years ago. I have come to recognise triggers systems and methods of dealing with them that work for me. Do not be hard on yourself, you are not to blame, you have an illness that you need to learn to live with and if you try hard you will get there. Good Luck

Answer 4

sounds like you might be bipolar.

3 good Websites that you should check out are

1. Isitreallydepression.com

2. depression.com

3. bipolar.com

Forget the girl 4 a while. SOMEDAY she'll get Lonely and contact you again. When she does; be the person that you know you can be.

p.s. Sounds like your mother might be most of your problem; so try giving yourself some space to breath from her.

LOL

Answer 5

I just came upon your question by chance and couldn't help but respond. I have no medical knowledge or any expertise in the area of mental health just my own personal experiences. I have been diagnosed clinically depressed in the past and can empathise with some of the feelings you are expressing-I have to say though a lot of what you are experiencing sounds more like the normal ups and downs of an uncertain relationship rather than directly stemming from your condition.
The internet is a strange and lonely place, in some ways it opens every door possible to worlds we have no hope of sharing normally-in other ways it can be all consuming, isolating and possibly even dangerous. You don't say whether you have ever met your friend in Canada but I get the impression you haven't. Exchanging pictures and E mails is not the same as face to face relationships-believe me I've been there! I'm a happily married woman who has internet friends, texting friends, MSN friends but thankfully other day to day friends and I think that's what keeps me fairly grounded. I think it's so sad that you truly believe you are unable to maintain real friendships and like I say not knowing how your condition manifests itself it's not my place to say. I know myself that even with friends i have met and known for years I have still gone through stages of feeling hurt and posessive if they're not responding as I'd like to my mail (and yes that does include the opposite sex). I don't want to dash your dreams but from an outsiders perspective this girl doesn't intend your relationship to be anything other than over the internet when it suits her.I'm sure she's not intentionally trying to hurt you but you are vulnerable and this is not going to help. By posting herself as single I think you have to accept that she does indeed view herself that way and she either genuinely just wants to be friends (corny I know) or is afraid to break things off as she knows how delicate your emotions are. You say she may not come back to you but I you have to understand what people say on email is very often what they know others want to hear, she may never have really truly been with you in the true sense for a while or even from the start-and neither of you is then being true to yourself if it continues. These things are hard enough to deal with for so called 'mentally sound' couples but when you feel as alone as you do and with your condition it must seem unbearable. All I can suggest is you keep trying to mix in the real world as much as possible, it might seem the internet is the answer but it just gives you more reason to hide from real people who you can't just switch off or delete. If you find some true like minded people they will accept your condition and you as one in the same thing, I know that sounds trite and no doubt you get told that all the time, it's not easy and real people have real emotions and real issues but dealing with those things is what real friendship is about. The same with real relationships-I can't promise you'll find Miss.right tomorrow but you have a far better chance in the here and now than locked away with just a keyboard for company. I won't patronise you by asking if your GP has recommended therapy blah blah-you sound like you want to genuinely address your issues and get on with life and I really hope you can learn to believe in yourself while you're still young enough to get out there and have a good time.

Answer 6

I am sorry for you, sounds very tough. I don't personally know, although my father was an angry psychotic personality...maybe counselling would have helped him. I do know if you went and spoke to your GP he or she would know exactly who to put you in touch with, and there are people who can help. Maybe he'd feel you needed to see a specialist, that would be the most helpful I think. I wish you luck, I know it is not easy, and I know you are not alone

Answer 7

I suggest you enroll in an anger management course and seek out some good one on one counseling too. Sounds to me like there is more going on here than only anger issues.

Answer 8

try putting yourself in her shoes and see how it would feel if someone kept doing this to you. i bet you would get fed up i don't blame her if she doesn't come back to you. i think you should figure out your situation before committing to a serious relationship. not only are you going to end up hurting your self but you will also hurt this person that you seem to care so much about. if she is understanding she will come back but don't blame her if she doesn't.

Answer 9

you need counselling, and anger management, you can get help, and it wont beat you, you need to tell yourself that, youve made the first step by admitting you have a problem, well done, go through your gp to get the help you need and deserve, i wish you all the best, be strong, youll get there!