I hate babies, and kids. I can't stand to be near them. I hate when I go to a store and they are running around or crying or being loud. I hate them at restaurants, I hate them at movies, I hate them pretty much anywhere. Almost all of my friends have them, and they just love their little monsters that scream and crap and throw fits and prevent them from going anywhere and having a life outside of the house. WHY am I unable to be that way? Am I missing a hormone or something? I mean my husband doesn't like kids either, so thats good, we don't have to worry about having any. However I just can't help but wonder WHY I have such a strong aversion to kids. I don't WANT to hate them, I just do.
Please no rude answers, remember I am not making a personal jab at YOUR kids.
2007-03-01 14:37:53 · 18 answers · asked by kherome 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Ok, maybe I don't have to be maternal, but I don't know anyone else like me who hates to be near children. Are there more people like me who can't stand the thought of having kids or being near them?
2007-03-01 14:45:55 · update #1
I just find it odd, and I feel like it's "wrong" to hate them. When I see them out and about begging for toys or slapping their siblings or screetching for ice cream etc I know I should be thinking "Kids do that, they haven't learned any better." But instead I end up thinking "What a disgusting little brat, I wouldn't blame that mother for dropping the kid off at an orphanage."
Also for me the thought of kids is so awful that it makes me cry if I think about having one. (Don't worry, my hubby is snipped it won't happen unless something terrible goes wrong.)
2007-03-01 14:54:46 · update #2
The reason why I think this is such an issue for me is that my husband is a GREAT man, you couldn't ask for better. I feel like he should have kids. There should be more people like him in this world. He doesn't seem to want them (willingly got a vasectomy, says he hates kids...I made very sure not to let him know I hated them until I asked how he felt about them.) but I feel bad. He's the last of him family and if he doesn't have kids, thats it.
2007-03-01 14:59:16 · update #3
Nothing is wrong with you - you have just evolved - congratulations!
2007-03-01 14:46:07 · answer #1 · answered by Sirena 5 · 6⤊ 2⤋
My husband and I didn't want children when we got together. We didn't like kids either. In fact, I was afraid that I would harm a child because I didn't think I had the patience needed to raise one. But then the longer we were together (10 years) we BOTH thought we'd like a child. So this past sumer our son was born. It is the single most wonderful and amazing thing that happened to us. We love this child like had never imagined we could love another human being. And most importantly, we see life (and chilren) in a different light.
Children as you describe them above are BEYOND OUT OF CONTROL. As others have suggested, it IS a parenting issue. And I think most of it is LACK of feeling they are in control of their children. I am not a spanker, but if you are worried HOW you will be judged in public (and fear you may lose your kids) it heavily influences your disciplining your kids. That or parents are too self absorbed that they would rather give in than educate.
2007-03-01 16:21:54 · answer #2 · answered by BLONDAGE 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, as a preschool teacher and a mommy (who loves all kids!) I can say this...when I see children acting the way you have described I can't stand to be near them either. What you are describing is a parenting issue, not an issue with kids. Now, if you can't stand being around kids that are polite and well behaved, that is a little different. Hey, not everyone wants to be a mommy and that is ok. I would only worry about it if you begin to act out on your dislike of children (to the children). Otherwise, I sure hope the snip job works! But hey, if you ever did have a baby of your own you may be suprised at the feelings you had buried down deep!
2007-03-01 15:55:13 · answer #3 · answered by newmommy74 2 · 1⤊ 4⤋
I don't think there is anything wrong with you. There isn't a law saying every woman must have a child. I used to feel that way too. Who knows, maybe one day things will change, you just might not be ready right now. Enjoy life life with your husband right now. Take advantage of being alone with him in peace and quite. It's not like that once the kids come along. Like I said, it might change. It did for me. I just had to grow up. Plus, being married to my husband had a lot to do with me changing my mind. I loved the idea having a little baby version of him :-)
2007-03-01 14:53:05 · answer #4 · answered by lululegs2000 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think its funny some of us forget we were those, crying screaming kids throwing fits at one point or another (kids are kids) I think it had allot to do with your growing up. Were you around allot of children? Did you babysit? I mean some people just don't know how to relate to them and that's okay, I know some people just have kids cause there friends are or they think that it'll help in there relationship and they turn out to be terrible parents. I think you and your husband know what you don't want and there's nothing wrong with that, but there's so much more to children then crying, screaming, and throwing fits, I didn't know what i was missing until i had my two daughters ( who aren't perfect) lol There's nothing wrong with you , you just know what you want
2007-03-01 16:43:46 · answer #5 · answered by destinygp9 1 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You're not wrong to hate kids. Some people love kids, some people dont. It's all about your personal preference. I love kids-I have one and want to have a couple more. I didnt always love kids. A couple years ago I didnt want any kids ever because I just didnt like them. But then I met my husband and then I got pregnant. There's nothing else in the world that can make you love kids as much as being pregnant with your own. It's amazing. I still dont love ALL kids, but I love my own more than words could ever say. Anyway, you hate kids and there's nothing wrong with that. Just dont ever babysit anyone elses kids. : )
2007-03-01 15:53:58 · answer #6 · answered by Amanda 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Before I had my daughter (I had her at 19) I couldn't stand kids either. I mean they were cute and all from far away but I didn't want them any where near me. When I got pregnant everyone tried to get me to give the baby away but I just didn't think I could handle that since she is part of me. After she was born it was like something in me changed. Now, believe it or not, I adore children. I'm going to school to be an elementary teacher and working at a preschool part time.
A lot of kids are obnoxious and it's usually because their parents don't give them enough attention or set limits for them so I can see where you are coming from. At least you are aware of the problem. If it's causing problems for you, perhaps with your friends who do have children, try watching them while they are calm or playing quietly and try to see the wonder in their eyes when they are experiencing something new and interesting and just enjoy their innocence.
2007-03-01 15:22:17 · answer #7 · answered by Tara C 2 · 2⤊ 4⤋
You know, it's weird. I kind of hate them too sometimes. They're always so loud. But I love my little cousins. They're awesome! I only like the kids that I know. Nothings wrong with you though. So don't worry.
2007-03-01 14:48:36 · answer #8 · answered by Liz 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Hey, listen, their are some bird mothers that drop their eggs into other species' nests and LEAVE.
You'd probably learn to love your own kids, kind of...
but remember one thing...
in the old days, it used to be taboo to BRING noisy little monsters out to church, to restaurants, etc.
I still know families that take their screaming brats outside to cool it!
So, somethings' wrong with the world today,
and we both know what it is!
2007-03-01 14:46:27 · answer #9 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 6⤊ 1⤋
Just because you are a woman does not mean you have to be maternal. Honestly, I hate kids at movies too, and I have two of my own!
2007-03-01 14:43:21 · answer #10 · answered by n2mama 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
I am pretty much that way,but the key is their not your kids. If you had kids of your own you would feel totally opposite, because they're part of you and the man you love. You can't help but love them.
Although I can say it does make a difference if the child is annoying in some way, like pitching a fit for no reason, crying, and usually kids act this way because they need to go home and go to bed! or they are hungry and tired.
Plus you would raise them they way you want to. Lots of parents ignore their kids, which is sad. Kids need lots of attention and love. I used to love playing outdoors with mine. So I have nothing but great memories of them as kids.
2007-03-01 14:55:14 · answer #11 · answered by Momwithaheart 4 · 2⤊ 6⤋