Was I being too pushy?

Question

I was dating this girl for a little over a year, but she had a big problem with talking too loud.

Now, ordinarily, I'd just accept this as the kind of person she is, but it was REALLY embarassing for both of us. Take this one time for example:

I was visiting her at her college and we were swimming at the pool (it was a large, outdoor pool and had quite a few kids with there parents.) Well, we're relaxing in the water and she swims infront of the pool's water jet. She presses her privates against it and then shouts: "Wow! I can feel that right agiainst my clit!" More than one parent turned their heads and gave us a REAL dirty look.

I politely asked her afterwards to consider her volume when she speaks. She then got really defensive told me not to change her. She even said I was 'pushy.' That hurt. :(

Was I being too pushy, or does this girl have a problem?

Answer 1

Some people are low talkers. That can be irritating.
She sounds like a loud talker. That can be embarrassing.

She won't change with her present attitude as she does not perceive it as a problem nor your comments as constructive.

You might try, with discretion, pointing out that some people were offended and staring at both of you when this happened.

I would also suggest that you say you are not interested in changing her rather this was an embarrassing episode for you.

If it really bothers you, perhaps it is time to move on.

Answer 2

Maybe both - obviously you ARE trying to change something, but it sounds like she needs to take that under consideration as well..