My Son and Eating?

Question

I have a son who is 14 and he never wants to eat. When we have lunch and dinner he never wants to eat any of it as well as drink milk. Today he didn't have school due to a snow day and I said what would you like for lunch and he said nothing. Well I made him drink his milk and then he lied to me about eating lunch. I remind him daily about how good food is and milk is for your body to keep healthy and make your bones strong. But I feel like I'm running out of choices. What should I do?

He is 5'11 and is 140 pounds and the doc says thats good. He has nothing to be ashemed of with his body so I don't think thats the problem. He is a open minded kid and isn't afraid to speak his words lol. Communitaction with him isn't a problem at all

I'm not naging him to eat. My point is he isn't eating Breakfeast and eating hardley any lunch and dinner.

Answer 1

There could be many reasons why he isn't eating. One could be that he just may not be hungry. Is it at all possible that he eats junk food when you're not around and then just tells you he's not hungry? (I used to do that).
I hope this isn't a possibility, however, many drugs supress the appetite.
I would definitely ask a doctor about this. If his doctor says he doesn't see a problem, but your gut tells you there is one, get a second opinion.

Also, I saw that you said he has nothing to be ashamed of so you wouldn't be worried about an eating disorder. Many times no one thinks the person with the disorder has anything to be ashamed of. He is obviously not anorexic if he is at normal body weight (a person has to be less than 85% of healthy body weight to be considered anorexic). But he may be not eating on purpose. I assume that you have sat down with him and asked why he's never hungry and why he never eats. Listen to what he says. If he's not on drugs and doesn't have an eating disorder, odds are he'll tell you the truth.

Good luck!

Answer 2

I am mom to 4 kids, ages 27, 25, 22, and 9. There comes a point in our kids' lives when we need to let them make some decisions on their own and trust them to make good choices or learn from their mistakes. Your son needs to be given some space and not be forced to eat or drink anything. Keep your refrigerator and cupboards stocked with good healthy choices. He is old enough to take care of breakfast and lunch on his own. Does he eat at school or pack a lunch? Make dinner and serve it to the family. If he eats, fine, if not that's his choice, but don't be a short-order cook and make him something later. He can make his own snack or re-heat dinner in the microwave. I am sure he knows how important food is and how milk helps his body stay healthy and his bones strong. Kids begin learning that in kindergarten. I strongly suggest that you stop bothering him about eating and stop reminding him how good food and milk are for him. There are plenty of battles that are important to fight, but this is not one that will end up well if you continue to be at him about eating and drinking his milk. Let him make some choices on his own. It's a mom's job to always worry, but I think this situation will improve dramatically if you take a step back and let him eat and drink when he wants. 14 is an age when kids begin to want some independence in preperation for "leaving the nest". Let him take some control over his life - I think you both will be happier.

Answer 3

Maybe ask him why he isnt eating- simply ask it cant hurt. It is strange narmally 14 year old boys dont stop eating. I dont know your son but dont totally rule out eating disorder- there are many different ones. He may be too ashamed to tell you if something isnt right. If the doctor says he is healthy he must be eating something during the day. He does need to learn good eating habits. I would say just ask him firstly. Usually when you are 14 you get your own lunch, maybe ask him and then leave him be.

Answer 4

It could be that he's not hungry at mealtimes because he snacks throughout the day ('grazing' as opposed to 'meals'). If the doctor says he's healthy then I wouldn't worry; it could be a phase. I had them when I was around 15; I completely lost my appetite for about 3 months, then it came back.

Unless you notice any significant weight loss and/or obsessive behavior, I wouldn't worry. But keep an eye out.

Answer 5

Don't force him to eat, first of all. That will only make him resent food (kind of like when we have to do something we don't like that someone keeps pushing on us-makes us dislike it more). Rest assured that as long as he is getting a balanced intake, even if it is small, he'll be okay. He may have a slower metabolism and not need as many calories as you think to sustain himself and grow. He'll eat if he's hungry. Loosen up, Mommy :)
If all else fails and u get really worried about him, take him to the doctor for a complete physical to make sure nothing is wrong!
Good Luck! :)

Answer 6

Is he depressed? Underweight?

Sounds like he either likes the attention or he is having some problems that you aren't aware of.

Would he be open to speaking to a counselor at school? I hate to jump to extremes but the lying is what concerns me. Why lie about eating?

Answer 7

I believe there are these tablets that are like a replacement for food (not a very good one) but better than nothing.. but I more so believe in natural ways. So you need to have aserious disscussion with him. I don't think you'de want to do this... but I payed my niece (when I was babysitting) $1 for every portion of her food she finished. She ate her corn- $1, she ate her noodle- $1... w/e it was... drank all her juice/milk- $1

Yea... it worked... -sigh-

But It might not be something you would want to do... I honestly think you should just sit down and really talk about what's wrong.

Answer 8

He probably doesn't like to eat. I am that way. I eat only when necessary. I eat to live not live to eat. I do drink half and half to help me maintain weight though. I wouldn't be concerned about him. He will eat when he gets hungry enough

Answer 9

well i am a recovering anorexic/bullimic. he may be worried about his figure or maybe even just not be hungry lately. if it continues take him to a psychologist. if nessary they can tube feed him. if he is under weight do this immediately. if hes not he may just not be hungry.keep an eye on him

Answer 10

Leave him alone, he is 14, when he is hungry he will eat. He probably isn't eating because you're constantly nagging him. Stop nagging.