I feel like I am putting my boyfriend through things that are not fair. I am not half as loveable as I used to and he calls me out on it and I get defensive. He is very insecure and I don’t like to reassure him a lot anymore cuz he has been like this ever since he cheated on me over a year ago. I like talking to friends and he doesn’t like it. So I no longer have friends. I always seem to be in bad moods around him, but when I am not around him I don’t pay attention to the depressing things so I am much happier. I do miss him when I am without him except for when I am at work. Cuz he calls and calls buggin me and my boss but he still doesn’t care that it jeopardizes my job. Even when he knows we cant afford to have me stay at home locked up til he gets home. I don’t like to help pay his past due bills cuz it leaves me payin the current bills and buying most of our household needs. I get upset easily when I go broke over bills when I really should have to pay less.
2007-03-01 10:45:15 · 11 answers · asked by Martin2006 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He has been telling me things will get better, but they only seem to get worse so I am always grumpy and short towards him. I snap at him when he tries to make it about him. I don’t give him a lot of loves anymore, and I don’t pay as much attention to him as in the past, but I just don’t feel like doin them any more. I love him I really do that’s why I am stickin around so long. I just turned 18 and we’ve been together since I was 15. I don’t really know what I want in life anymore…but I know I am extremely unhappy with the way life has turned out for me. I am very weak when it comes to him, I do not want to hurt him. I have tried to leave but I always end up back home with him. I love him I really honestly do but I just don’t have the drive to give him my all when my all is not happy. You know ?? I know it would probably be best to leave but that’s what I’ve tried and I never follow through with it. I wish I could just be kidnapped and never returned!
2007-03-01 10:45:30 · update #1
i agree with braindead, i would give her a thumbs up but for some reason i can't give thumbs up and thumbs down...
2007-03-01 10:52:03 · answer #1 · answered by K Boose 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
im gonna tell u a story when i was with this guy for 2 yrs in the beginng he was good 2 me then he started 2 talk 2 other girls n i know he cheated on me other thing he never got a job i also i had 2 pay 4everything 2 him n his bills as well he also started 2 steal money from me for his drug problems n it was 2 the pt that not only i changed with him emotional but i didnt want 2 leave him because i wasnt ready 2 leave n i was with him 4 so long that i was afriad 2b alone but most of all i was unhappy just like u are the best thing 4u is that u will know when u r ready 2 leave him n the reason y u r the waay u r with him is the fact that he cheated on u n trust is a special thing between 2ppl that along comes with respect in a relationship n by lettin treat u like that begin selfish like u payin his bills not thinking bout u u lettin him do that 2 u n its ur flaut u shouldnt let him play u like that thats what making u change with thats what making u so mad at him because of how is 2u u know as well as i do that no man n i mean a really wouldnt treat a girl no a women whom he has been with so long would disrepect like that n he jus cant say sorry 2u its not enough i have alot 2 think bout n i think u know the answer 2 that urself
2007-03-01 11:01:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm so sorry for what you're feeling right now. I can understand the "stuck" syndrome you're currently going through. The only advice I can really offer is looking deep inside yourself to what is best for you. You didn't mention his age but that kind of control he has over you isn't going to change at any age. No man has the right to tell you that you can't have friends just because he doesn't like it. He wants all of your time and in time that's going to cause you a lot of stress. And if you continue to stay with him, it's bound to get worse. Is this the kind of life you want? You're treating him w/less outward love because he makes you not want to show it. You deserve to be w/someone who adores you and at your age, you have plenty of time to find it. His actions towards you isn't loving, it's controlling hon and the longer you stay w/him, the harder he'll make it for you to ever walk out that door.
Good luck, I hope you're able to find the answer you're looking for.
2007-03-01 11:04:46 · answer #3 · answered by aweety69 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all come down. Second do what you have to do.....do not be fickle. when you leave him, do not run back to him. It seems to me that you are not love with him anymore. You need to break away and start a new to keep your job and your health. He sounds like he isnt in love with you anymore. Because if he loved you then he would not act the way he does. I think you need to have refreshment in your love life. You need to just leave him and get yourself together. Do not run back to him. I can see your miserable. You are so miserable and you need to wake up and realize that, there are better men out there than him. I know I am one of them. I am not very romantic and I will admit that. I think that you need examine your love life with him. See if it is worth it to rekindle and if not then you need to let it go. Do what you can to just be free and concentrate your job for a little while. Get stronger and not be weak. It isnt good for a woman to be weak. I know it is your nature but you need a serious realization that he probably just isnt in love with you anymore. For what you explained that you have been fickle and you feel that you will be alone for a long time but I think that you should be strong and I know it is easier said than done but in order to live the best life you can. You can not have people bring you down and keep you down. I have to be free myself. If I am not in love with a person. Then I am wasting my life with them. I would still love them and have no regrets being with them but you need to do what you can to make things right and for what I just told you. I hope you follow through because I put my heart into this. My heart has been broken many times. I had a girlfriend at age 16 on my birthday, cheat on me by holding hands with a best friend of mine or should I say ex best friend. I forgave him but I can not forget because it keeps haunting my memories. You need get some friends again. Your friends are more important than this man. Some friends will not stab you into the back and some will. As I said, look over your life and think hard by yourself. Is it worth keeping......ask yourself that.
2007-03-01 11:04:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is normal I think, but to be honest, you are better off without him, you obviously love him more than he loves you, and this relationship is not a healthy one, my suggestion break it off, it will hurt, for a while because he has broken down your confidence, and removed people from your life who can help you get away from him (your friends that you are no longer allowed to hang out with) A good relationship is about give and take, and you don't have that here, get away from him, get your friends and your life back
2007-03-01 10:51:08 · answer #5 · answered by braindeadbrilliance 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Move out. Tell him you will work on things with him while your not living with him. And make him put his money where his mouth is.. he doesnt sound like a man he sounds like a little boy who needs a babysitter more then a girlfirned
Your not being anything more to him other then a rug to walk on
YOU DESERVE MORE THEN THAT!!!
2007-03-01 10:50:49 · answer #6 · answered by chrystal_lynn2002 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you should give him all the loves he wants but limit his control over you. i was in the same situation as you. you should have not given up your friends cause he doesnt like it. if its just you and him you will get tired of it just being the two of you. take time to yourself.
2007-03-01 10:53:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
for the reason which you're diseased. Dis-eased with the/ your (self). The "diva" on your call shows how. It shows you care plenty greater how others pereceive your sexuality as oppose the your character. one in each and every of those dis-ease with the self generally brings DRAMA (from different diseased people aka WANNABE DIVAS).
2016-09-30 02:06:49 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey at your age you should be sititng on cloud 9-all laughter and carefree days! that guy is a milestone around your neck, too freaken needy and he will only bring you down and age you--he sounds so insecure and jealous! i'm a lot older than you and i wouldn't even stand for that.
2007-03-01 10:51:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
my opinion is to get out now....make a clean break and don't look back...u cannot remain friends at all...u have an unhealthy relationship...and u r very young..u will bounce back very quickly..stop blaming yourself thats exactly what he wants because thats what keeps u there....I've been there....there r plenty of other fish in the sea..............
2007-03-01 10:53:21 · answer #10 · answered by tigermoondog 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are in Love,love can bring doubt.the sad truth is...you might not make it.But it might open up your future.be open for LOVE again.You know how WONDERFUL LOVE can be.YOU are to be loved,everyone is.
Maybe You must end this to be HAPPY.Give it some good thought.You have already started the process,it is up to yourself to make the right move.be your HAPPY LOVABLE self again.
GOOD LUCK!!!
Think about this...Is it unfair about what he is doing to you?
2007-03-01 11:07:42 · answer #11 · answered by BaDonkaDonk 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋