we have been friends for over a year and we have been through so much together. Our relationship was great at first then we got too close. She admitted to me that all of her relationships were bad and she said that all her sisters had to go through lots of bad relationships to get the right one and be happy. She backed away from me because she believed our relationship would work... maybe it scared her... I love her so much and I don't wanna live hte rest of my life without her. I have a job offer that is out of state and i only have 2 months to decide and I'm afraid I will never see her again... what do I do???
2007-03-01 09:04:34 · 15 answers · asked by missionary_koolaid 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
From your post, it sounds like you really love her. She could very well love you too, but after a lot of bad relatonships she is afraid to admit it. She probably sees the situation as this; if she dosen't "love" you than it won't hurt as much when you burn her like everyone else has.
If you really love her, really really love her, isn't that worth fighting for? She might need strong reassureance that you aren't going to hurt her, and it might take a while for her to feel comfortable with her emotions, but in the end It will be worth it.
2007-03-01 09:25:50 · answer #1 · answered by Luviticus 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on your leadership.. As a guy you can help her become more spiritual, you know? Women love a guy who will lead her into growing more spiritually, and if that doesn't happen, they will look for a leader somewhere else. You got a good thing going for you, so wait and let her get comfortable with you. It might take a little more work for her to be assured that you're the right guy and she won't have to go through a series of bad guys before she finds a good one. So I say, explore her potential, and cross the road where she wants you to and you'll take her where you want to get her. That's in a nutshell. A sensible guy is hard to find, and if you're that way, she'll have you for keeps. God be with you! She might have just realized that you're it. I remember it scared me to death when I was in her shoes. Oh, .... but the bliss!!! I only wish I could tell her she has no reason to be afraid.
2007-03-01 17:15:33 · answer #2 · answered by Pivoine 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe a religious and non-religious person can work out a good relationship if u both believe in something I think is bigger than God, and that is 'Faith.' Faith in love, in life, in each other, in people. She has to gain that. She may not have faith in people right now. But I think you are the force that will bring it out in her. Ask her if that's true.
I was in love with a Christian gal, even though at the time I was an atheist, but I know it would have worked. She was one of the best things to happen to me in my life. Im a deist now, which is spiritual. Good luck.
2007-03-01 17:11:56 · answer #3 · answered by Huguenot 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you decide to go on with her knowing that she lacks spiritually, if this is something important to you, you need a serious talk. Think of later on, if you have kids together, do you want them to have spiritually fit parents, or does it matter that much to you? Figure out your priorities, and if some things are incredibly important to you that you feel she may lack even in the future, go on without her. You need someone that connects with you to be truly happy, trust me.
2007-03-01 17:10:44 · answer #4 · answered by It's Just My Opinion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said that she was lacking spirituality, does that mean that she is not as religious or do not take it as seriously as you? Because, if you are the type that reads the Bible, goes to church every Sunday, pay your tithes, and she does believe in God but not in going to church and doing that, then, maybe you need to find a woman who does like to go to church and take their religion as seriously as you do. You can not make a person go to church if they do not feel like it because that is the way they are. If you ended up being with this woman, hoping that she is going to be as religious or spiritually accepting as you, then you are in for another surprise.
So, take that job and hope you find a woman that meets your spiritual needs.
2007-03-01 17:22:44 · answer #5 · answered by uchaboo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
think what would make you happier....taking a new job with probably more money and oppurtunities or spending time with this women that's skeptical about the idea of you two being together. Also, this job is fulproof, but if you stay with this girl, she might not want to be together. plus there are more fish in the sea, i think you should take the job offer.
2007-03-01 17:09:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what the title of your question means, but brother, I will tell you that the first thing you have to do is recognize that you come first in this regard. It is your life first and foremost. You can't force her to make up her mind on you. That's in her realm, not yours. Anyway, good luck. I'm sorry. That must be very stressful for you.
2007-03-01 17:11:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there aren't problems in a relationship, its not one. Problems don't break relationships, it strengthens it. Its just how you guys settle the problems and how much you guys love each other. She lack security, she lacks positive thinking. If you want to be with her, you'd better start brainwashing her with positive thoughts.
2007-03-01 17:10:34 · answer #8 · answered by ian@blueice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if it's meant to be it'll happen on its own. take the job. who knows. 5 years down the line you might run into her at a coffee shop and fall in love all over again. dont ever put your life on hold for someone else though. once you chase someone, you will do it forever.
2007-03-01 17:09:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lacking spiritually but has potential...everyone has potential...I know how hearts fall in love but do you really think it's a good idea to be unequally yoked with her? have you spoken to her regarding her spiritual beliefs and if so is she interested and willing to convert. is it priority for you and her? if so then it needs to be discussed more..
pray about the situation first
2007-03-01 17:11:07 · answer #10 · answered by Mary S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋