Should my sister forgive me?

Question

Something serious happened between me and my mother one night when she came home (she was staying with me for a while). And in order to get my mother's drunk *** out of my home (at 2 am before she woke up my 3 little girls) I told her that I knew about some things she had told my sister which were very serious but complete and utter lies. I broke a promise to never tell my mom I knew about these things. What I did was wrong I know that. I've apologized sincerely and asked her to forgive me. It's been 9 mths. and she still won't talk to me. I told her that I was afraid for my little girls seeing their grandma in this disgusting drunken rage....I mean she was falling down drunk and swearing and so mean and screaming at the top of her lungs. And I tryed reasoning with her lovingly and calm then I tryed demanding that she repect my home and finally these things came out of my mouth...and well you know how it's ended. My mom and I have moved past it and talk ....but my sister....

Answer 1

You should have called the police and had her removed. You punished your sister for your mothers behaviour. You violated a sacred trust between you and your sister.
It would be nice if she forgave you but it looks like you hurt her pretty deeply. Maybe you should quit making excuses and face up to the fact you screwed up big time.

Answer 2

It sounds to me like your mother did something awful by behaving that way in your home, and you did something awful by violating your sister's confidence. Now, you and your mother are fine, but your sister is the one who was used to fix your situation.

She should forgive you, but only because harboring anger is destructive to one's self. You say you've apologized for it, but you're still justifying your behavior by saying how horrible your mother's behavior was. Breaking your sister's confidence wasn't the only way to handle it; you could have stood on your own feet, taken a stand and told her to leave your home. Try the following apology to your sister and see if it works better than what you've tried so far:

"_________, I'm sorry I broke your confidence. That must have made you feel used, and it must have hurt you a lot to have to question whether or not you can trust me now. It must have made you angry to know you'd have to deal with our mother after I blabbed, too. At the time I thought it was the only way to handle the situation, but I was wrong. I didn't need to use you to get out of the situation, too. In the future, I'll keep what you tell me to myself. I'll work on being honest and direct with our mother, which I should have done at the time. I don't expect you to forgive me RIGHT NOW, but I hope you'll accept my apology."

Answer 3

You are human, you made a mistake and this is something your sister needs to understand. If she can't forgive you after such time then maybe you just need to step back and when she is ready she will. The better way to get past any problem is to deal with it, but your sis isn't ready, she wants to hold on to the anger. Let her make the next move to reconciliation.

Answer 4

Well u certainly screwed up u cant be trusted. The trust between sister and brother should be strong u broke that. Your sister has every right to feel the way she does so just give her time be patient she may come around in her own time.

Answer 5

Your sister should forgive you.Life is too short to be not speaking to your family because of something you said while your mother was drunk and obviously your feelings were for you to get your mother out of there before the grandbabies seen her.Your mother should never put you in that situation again.As for your sister not forgiving you,she doesn't realize are precious sisters are.I hope all things work out for you.God bless you and your family.

Answer 6

me and my sister had a fight like this and we didnt speak for over a year. my sister is very stubborn and when we finally spoke i stated to her all the reasons i said what i said and that she had no right to start a big fight. we have been talking now for a year but we are still at arms length.

Answer 7

you're doin this for her own solid,, she ought to no longer realize it now, yet later she will... so dont supply up defendin her @ college & shop ur eyes on her... no rely what she says to u or do to u... cuz of course she nevertheless doesnt comprehend what's suited for her.. & particular offcourse she'd forgive u !!! :S its in basic terms a rely of time.. ;)

Answer 8

No