My girlfriend (and all women I guess) are very secrective and don't come out and say things that may be important. How can I get my g/f to be more up front with me? She's kind of shy when it comes to personal things (the act of sex and things like that are no problem) like just talking about 'us' in the future and she seems like she's afraid or unsure of her feelings for me. I'm 90% sure she doesn't want to break up but she just seems like she doesn't want to talk about certain things.
2007-03-01 04:47:11 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There's no problem with sex, it just seems that she kind of 'withdrawls' from me sometimes like I might hurt her or something. Makes me paranoid sometimes. I don't know if I should hold her or just leave her alone.
2007-03-01 05:19:08 · update #1
First of all, you will never " understand " her. ha.ha. Most likely, if she isn't mad at you (and I'm sure you would know that) then she is just comfortable with the current situation. Nothing needs said if everything is fine. right?
Some of us live life one day at a time and really aren't always considering what's ahead yet. Or some of us just plan on letting DESTINY take care of our future.
When I'm in a relationship, I don't want questioned about the future. I want a mutual knowledge (like a secret) that we belong together.
2007-03-01 05:13:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would think that being a g/f is your answer. She is probably not wanting to tell you her whole lifes future with you and get her hopes up for something that may not happen. Even when your married, its hard now-days to let your partner know every dream because it could easily be shattered. there is so much adultry going on these days, some people dont take a marriage seriously. I let everything out myself and of cource it got taken away real quick ( adultry) I now will never look to the future except what I can control.
Good luck tho!!
2007-03-01 12:58:12 · answer #2 · answered by patti p 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'll speak for me (since not every women is the same) but sometimes I am just afraid to talk about a future because at some point of my life I used to make plans talk about it and then I was soooo illusionated with my plans that when it did not worked out I spend month crying about it, so I rather not to do that any more, when it comes to sex, I do talk about it, but with the light off( I know is sounds crazy, but is less embarrasing) try to do that with her, it might work!
2007-03-01 12:59:39 · answer #3 · answered by ~Soraya~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be more understanding of her shyness...Make her feel loved and comfortable. I know I'd be the same way and would only feel like talking about us, if I felt more secure about us. It's hard for any female to be willing to give their hearts up especially when they had to mend their broken heart on their own. Good luck !!!
2007-03-01 12:51:57 · answer #4 · answered by the_wicked_itch_of_the_west 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some people just don't like to appear vulnerable to other people. so when you ask her a question where she has to tell you about her feelings or whatever, she is going to avoid it. the only way to solve this problem is to let her get to know you well, show her that she can trust you, tell her things about yourself that make you look vulnerable, and just wait. when she gets to where she really trusts you, she will open up.
2007-03-01 12:56:26 · answer #5 · answered by kittycat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You open up to her. And talk to her. Open the topic and be the first to talk. Maybe she just wants you to make the 'first move' and assure her all the time--not just verbally--that you love her, accept whoever she is whatever she says/thinks, and support her aaaall the way. Oh and be VERY patient too! :)
2007-03-01 12:57:52 · answer #6 · answered by ruthie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just get closer to her...not just as in sexual meaning...like tell her some personal things about you and maybe she'll come out and say some stuff...just make that bond stronger not only as boyfriend/girlfriend...but also as friends...just make her feel more comfortable...she'll come around...good luck!
2007-03-01 13:00:17 · answer #7 · answered by Kalee♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Come right out and ask her.
2007-03-01 12:51:57 · answer #8 · answered by letthepartybeginnow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋