Someone help me i dont know if i made the right descision?

Question

ok well at my school they have this counceling program and i went to go see the therapist there and i told her that i would like for her to give me therapy and she said that since im 15 i could enroll for myself without my mom knowing. The therapist works for a company and she had me sign some papers i dont want my mom to know cuz i feel uncomfortable her knowing so my mom doesnt know anything nor my friends and now ive been feeling depressed cuz i started with the counceling thing do you think i should tell 1 of my friends about it? and do you think its right that i got a therapist or could they be a catch?

Answer 1

Hello **Pisces*,

So, Now that you are 15, you are mature enough to get yourself into things that make you uncomfortable while you keep it secret from your mom? I wonder who comes up with these rules???

Ok, first I'd like to say that the decision is obviously entirely up to you. I'd be glad to go over it with you if that will help you with your choices. It is normal for teenagers to have and keep secrets from their parents and to want privacy from them! That is a normal part of growing up, however, I think you must have left out some information in your question.... Most people don't just sign up for counseling and therapy sessions unless there is a pretty serious problem they are dealing with.

One of the most important things for you to know is that your mom (unless there is something terribly wrong with her) is the ONE person in this world who cares most for you and your future well-being. Of course, she might be surprised you are having counseling or therapy, but IF she was aware of the problem, and aware that YOU feel the need for outside help, she could give you support and encouragement in your search for help.

Don't discount your mom's life experiences and level of love for you in favor of the confidantes of a few friends who might use your confessions against you at some later time, you know how cruel young people are at times......

If your mom is part of the problem, eventually she would need to be brought into the counseling process anyway if it was going to help with your 3 years left at home. If your mom isn't part of the problem: She would LOVE to help you. She can't help you though if she does not know there is a problem.

The thing that will never change is that you are her daughter and she is your mother. You can start now to build on that relationship which will be one of the most beneficial and rewarding relationships you have with anyone your whole life, or you can start now to pull away and cut your ties. Go it alone so to speak. But you should remember, those "friends" will soon fade out of your life, however, your mom will love you and have your best interest at heart as long as she lives.

Good luck and best wishes!

S

Answer 2

You absolutely did the right thing! You took responsibility and took charge when it needed to be done. You are going to benefit from this therapy by knowing that you are dealing with your feelings of insecurity, the past, inferiority, or whatever.No one made you sign up; YOU DID THIS. Therapy is great; you get your baggage out and send it on its way so that you can go on and deal with what life has in store for you... and it is alot sometimes. Who knows, with enough familiarity with the field and how the career works, YOU could help others by being a counselor or a therapist. You could save lives. You could save marriages. You are going to be the most "together" girl on campus. Only tell a real friend about your therapy, they may mock you for it, make you second-guess it. It is YOUR future, your friends won't be there really so remember YOU come first not them. You will have the world in your hands. Good job!

Answer 3

Honee, if you feel the need to "get a therapist," then you prob need one. I'm not saying you're mental or anything, but the first step to getting help for depression is acknowledging the problem. Don't get discouraged if you feel worse coming out of a therapy session than you did going in; it means that you're making progress in discovering why you feel this way. If you show signs of serious depression (Self Injury, bipolar symptoms, clinical depression) than the therapist will be required to tell your mom. There is nothing to be ashamed or afraid of; if you really need help, then you are doing the right thing. Take it from someone who knows: Therapy is the best thing I've ever done for myself. I was just diagnosed with bipolar disorder (my family has a long history of depression / bipolar) and I finally felt relieved, because I knew that there was something "fixable" about me, and I wasn't crazy. Good luck!

Answer 4

This is probably something you should discuss with the therapist. If you feel you need a therapist, then you should see one. Why are you worried about telling people you are seeing a therapist? If you are worried that your friends or family might think badly of you, I doubt they would. Your parents especially would want to know, so they can be sure you are okay.

As far as the papers you had to sign, it may be something as harmless as a contract that you will call your therapist if you have thoughts of suicide, or it could be something about you understanding that if you talk of harming yourself or others that this therapist has to report it by law. You should read what you are signing though, for future reference.

Answer 5

I feel that you should stick with it. If you wanted to see a therapist, you probably felt that there was a need for some professional help. As far as telling your friends, I wouldn't, as they might embarrass you with the fact. I do think that if you trust your Mom, you should tell her. Maybe not right away, but after you see how things are going. Do not be depressed, as seeking help is always the right decision.

Answer 6

Whatever papers you signed are not legally binding because of your age. You are not supposed to feel depressed because you started therapy! Perhaps you are feeling guilty because you haven't told your mom and your friends. It is up to whether you choose to tell anyone. If you don't want others to know, do you trust your friend not to tell anyone else? I think you are better off telling your mom. She will not be privy to any information discussed with your therapist without your consent. I would discuss your feelings with your therapist, she will be more likely to be of help. Hope that helps, and good luck.

Answer 7

There's absolutely no shame in seeing a therapist - a lot of people wish they had access to one for themselves! As the mother of 17-, 15- and 12-year-old daughters, i would tell you that you should let your mother know that you think that you need help and how you've gone about getting it. She'll be proud of you for thinking like an adult and helping yourself. I know that my middle daughter sees a therapist in school and I'm glad about it. We don't talk about specifics, but I'm happy that she has some adult to talk to if not me.

I would maybe not tell your friends though. Teenagers can be strange like that and may not be as supportive as you would like. maybe if you have a really good friend, you could tell them about it and ask them not to tell others becuase you feel a little shy about it.

Again, there's NOTHING wrong with seeing a therapist. I see one and it makes me feel better to have an impartial person to discuss things with. You sound like a smart kid and we all wish you luck with this!

God bless kiddo!

Answer 8

Your 15 so you think that you are going to get caught and then you will have to explain it to whoever catches you. Counseling is nothing to be ashamed of, to your friends or to your parents it is you just trying to seek help and figure out some inner problems if there are some, you are at a difficult age and people can try to lead you down different paths and get you to do things you might not want to do and it can be very confusing so I think you are doing the right thing. I think if you talk to your parents or a friend it might make you feel a little more comfortable and at ease and you will be more relaxed just to let them know you are going you don't have to tell them what you talk about with the counselor, just let them know you are going and not ready to share the information at this time, you just wanted to get there input on what they thought about you going. It is perfectly normal and I think you are very brave! My son is 14 and if he did this i would be very proud of him!

Answer 9

hmmm this can be a bit complicated. it depends on the reason why you got the therapist. if you think abt it, your mum loves you and no matter how bad it is if she realises that u actually went out of ur way to get therapy then you are seriously having problems and she would be willing to help. but if you tell your friends. at this age, their loyalty cannot be trusted, as you dont really want people to know what you are going through, they could mistakenly let it out to another friend and so on... iw ish you luck inw hat ever you decide to do!

Answer 10

I do not know you and you do not give enough info for me to advise you properly but .... If you have a loving family give them the chance to help you . I hate that schools think they can get involved like that. Your just 15yrs old the guilt you feel for going behind your parents backs must be awful...... and your dealing with that on your own? If you have parent that are good people then give them the chance to help you. I'm just some person on line that does not know anything about you so your really going to have to go with your own gut on this ........The only thing that I do not like is the secrecy of it all .Sometimes teens do not give there parents a chance. Parents can surprise you. I will pray for you.