I have been seeing a guy casually for about 7 weeks dating officially for two. Over the last few weeks he has been really distant. The first time he cancelled on me he said that it was coz he didnt want to stuff things up. Then he was fine last week and this week when i asked him about doing something he said that he would have to see coz work has been stressing him. He wont talk to me about work coz he says he cant. Im starting to feel lost as i want to help him but im starting to feel like more of a hinderance than a help. My friends say to relax and let him be coz he hasnt really done anything wrong and he told me to stop worrying but its hard when he wont talk to me.
2007-02-28 22:32:53 · 22 answers · asked by dragonfly_princess_72 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That's exactly what I think that I am doing to my boy friend, except I don't mean it! I'm really stressed out from all my school work, we have about a billion projects due, and he always asks me if it's him. The answer is no of course. Just let your bf straighten out his routine, and get his act together, and you will be fine. Don't break up with him, cuz i wouldn't want my bf to break up with me in a situation like this.
2007-02-28 22:42:19 · answer #1 · answered by yoyoyowatup3579 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At this point you don't have much invested in the relationship. If you don't feel he's giving you a fair amount of attention you could just stop seeing him and move on. You said you are officially dating, but does that mean you have both agreed to not see other people? If not, he could still be dating other women.
It could also be that the relationship is moving faster than he's comfortable with or he feels like you are being too clingy. In either case, he may just be trying to put on the brakes so he feels more comfortable.
If the relationship is such that you have agreed to not see other people, then you probably need to talk to him. Don't have a formal conversation about your relationship that you plan in advance, just ask him at some point when you are together if he feels comfortable with the relationship.
2007-02-28 22:53:42 · answer #2 · answered by Justin H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in my opinion, when two pple start dating, they should be very excited about each other, looking for every opportunity to spend time together, talk, and basically try to get to know each other well..I don't see this happening with this guy you are with..Is he fresh out of a disatrous relationship? then maybe you should give him time to come around..you dont want to be too forcy..this might just turn him off as he may still be sad over previous relationship..
What kind of work does he do? Is wit the FBI or some other undercover agency? why CAN"T he talk about his jjob..
Anyway, I'll advice that you give him a breather for a while..let him come out of his shell..but don't want to long, some men just can't make up their mind what they want, no matter how long you give them!!
Goodluck.
2007-02-28 22:43:59 · answer #3 · answered by sweetDove 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he is bored with the relationship and that he wants to move on. You see, when you allow guys to date you casually they get to fool around with other ladies too. Now that he is dating you officially, all the fun has stopped and reality checked him and now he realises that this isnt what he wants. Try not making contact with him, if he reaches out to you then maybe theres hope but if he doesnt contact you after 3 days then you know he doesnt wanna be with you anymore.
2007-02-28 22:41:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby, here's what you need to do, first you have to be sure on what you want from him, is there anything like feelings involved? If yes, does he know about it? And if not, why don't you tell him?
Perhaps he needs time to do things on his own, and this because he doesn't want to get tired of seeing you, that's my g/f used to tell me, that "it's for my own good, so that she'd not get tired of seeing me" so things like this happens all the time, just give him a break and move, just it be for now, if he eventually didn't get back to you then you have to move on with your life atleast to know where you stand..
Hope this helps.. G/d luck
2007-02-28 22:52:05 · answer #5 · answered by codedfeelins 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that you are there for him if he needs to talk or anything.go out with your friends and do not worry about it as he will come around in time or not,but you still need to live your life he will accept what you offer or stay the way he is and if he months down the road still puts distance between the 2 of you think of whether or not you really want to invest in this type of relationship.good luck
2007-02-28 22:44:56 · answer #6 · answered by angel_ns_texas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
7 weeks is not long enough for you to know this kind of guy. also, why worry yourself if he is doing that stuff to you. he is like a "switch", his mood will just turn on/off whenever he feels like. your friend is right by telling you to relax, so i agree with her. do not worry, maybe he has some problem with his own life. newaiz, try to move on and do not get stuck with him. be cool...
2007-02-28 22:44:17 · answer #7 · answered by President Of D' Clan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You havent been dating him long enough to really be worried about somthing like that yet. He may not be entirely comfortable with shareing everything with you yet. So just be there for him when you can and let him deal with what he has to deal with. When he gets closer to you he will start talking.
2007-02-28 22:37:37 · answer #8 · answered by Crystal D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your friends are right..sometime in your life you also feel that you need space and time, esp when there is something goin' on and you have a very stressful environment at home and at work...so that guy youre talking about maybe needs time and space..so give him that...i know you mean well to help him out whatever is bothering him but maybe he wanted it to face alone..some people are born that way.well maybe it will help...go find something that take your mind off him...he'll came back to you in his own time
2007-02-28 22:45:33 · answer #9 · answered by sunshine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friends a right, you do need to relax. Most people are stressed out by their jobs, and truthfully it's not something you can just 'help' him with. When he is ready to talk to you about it, he will. So, just enjoy your time with him.
2007-02-28 22:42:22 · answer #10 · answered by mixedup 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋