What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
When blondes have more fun do they know it?
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die
Hard work never killed anyone, but why chance it?
Police Station toilet stolen....Cops have nothing to go on.
Schizophrenia beats being alone.
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.
I used to be schizophrenic, but we're all right now.
Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery.
I like kids, but I don't think I could eat a whole one
Hypochondria is the only disease I haven't got.
I bet you I could stop gambling
Bigamy: one wife too many.Monogamy: same thing
Karaoke is Japanese for "Tone Deaf"
There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
what do ya think? got any one liners to share?
2007-02-28 21:20:51 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
there good ,but i think you have way to much time on yours hands and maybe should stop listening to the voices in your head they will get you into trouble one day.trust me i know
2007-02-28 23:43:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
All by Samuel Langhorn Clemens (aka Mark Twain)
2007-03-01 05:28:48 · answer #2 · answered by Superdog 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Midget fortune-teller escapes from police. Small medium at large.
2007-03-01 06:18:49 · answer #3 · answered by jackalanhyde 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
some of them were good
2007-03-01 05:28:01 · answer #4 · answered by gregs111 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ha ha. Awesome!
2007-03-01 05:27:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
hah very good
2007-03-01 06:10:25 · answer #6 · answered by asdfjkl; 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nice.^_^
2007-03-01 05:27:13 · answer #7 · answered by Lyrical Lie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋