Uni problems, really desperate, any ideas??????? . top points for best answer!!!!!!?

Question

Its me again ( sorry if you are getting tired of me)

I have been really down for quite a long time and this is really affecting my work at uni. I feel so alone and spaced out, I have distanced myself from family and friends, they don’t understand. I have been having some dark thoughts and I can’t seem dig myself out of this hole. I am trying to sort myself out, but it is taking too long.

Last semester i messed up and failed 3/5 of my courses, fortunately i can retake. You can only fail two credits in the whole year.

So this semester I promised myself, I would try to go to all my lessons. But I have failed to do this as I keep on putting off going to class. I don't know what's wrong with me, every time I think about going I feel nauseated , I get have a stomach upset, once I threw up, I don't know why feel this way.

Today I found out that in one of the classes (I have never been to), an assessment due in. There's no way can I complete it as I have no ideas what it is abou

I need to talk to my lecturer, but I’m cacking myself how am I suppose to tell her that not only haven't I done the assessment , but I have never been to one of her lectures.

My reasons for this will be even harder to explain.

I don’t want to tell her that I have been feeling really down, she won’t understand, no one really understands. Also I think that’s she has probably heard it all before.

I don’t want an extension, I just feel that by talking to her and making her aware of my predicament, I wont be sooo scared to attend class. What do I do now??? I want to talk to her but I am sooo scared. I was thinking of emailing her, but I have no clue where to start??

What would you do in my situation??

Answer 1

Hi there,

i have kinda been having the same problems...kinda scary, when i read your question, i thought i had wriote most of it! I started uni in october but I haven't been doing as well as i could due to problems like depression etc.I too am avoiding classes etc. I have missed a lot of work and have 3 assignments due very shortly all on the same date, which does sort of freak me out...I have also spend everyday thinking of quitting.

My advice would be to contact your advisor of studies, just to make her/him aware of your difficulties..you dont have to share personal details but make them aware your not having an easy time due to "personal problems" that way in the future, if you are "called up" on anything...you will have proof that you informed someone of your difficulties..which is very important. It would also be good for you to go to see the uni doc or at least the counsellor (trust me i know how daunting that can seem)..the counsellor can give you support and even contact your lecturer for you, or give you tips on how to tell her about your personal difficulties.

Your worrying yourself into ill health and uni is not worth that at all honey (wish i took some of my own advice)..You could ask your advisor of studies about taking the semester out?? Im not sure if you see that as an option but if you feel you need more time to straighten things out, ask your advisor about your options.

If there is reasons behind your depressive state then please talk to someone...if talking to friends/family is too daunting try someone objective like the samaritans perhaps?? You can even email them if talking over the phone seems too scary email them at: [e-mail]
If you dont think there is any reasons behind how you feel it could be a chemical imbalance in the brain and the right medication could help you and these feelings of anxiety!

Believe me, I know what it's like!!..Feel free to email me, hope you find help soon

x

Answer 2

You need to talk to your lecturer straight away. Then get yourself an appointment with the uni Dr, sounds a little to me like you are suffering from depression, and if you don't do anything this will only get worse. The Dr can give you something to help, but they wont solve your problems, you need to see what the root of this problem is! Not the best solution, but why don't you see if you can take a year out? and re start next academic year? May ease some of the pressure and give you a little time to sort yourself out. You will have to take the bull by the horns and speak with your lecturer, there is no way around this, and things are rarely as bad as you think they are going to be! You will probably be surprised by there reaction? and they are there to help so if you are honest and explain the situation they may be able to help and come up with a practical solution.

Good luck and hope things work out for you

Answer 3

The best thing immediately is to own up to your teacher about your situation, then get some help - probably medical, ie some treatment for depression and anxiety probably. Until you are more settled and calm, you will not be able to pick up the strings again and work. Even if it means repeating a year, it is worth getting your health sorted out first. It may mean re-assessing what you really want from your life, so don;t be afraid of facing reality. Academic work may not be right for you ... or it may be once you have had some rest and treatment so that you can start again. Good luck.

Answer 4

You have already made the first step, by putting all your worries down. Now you need to talk to someone directly, Uni's always have good counsellor's, go and see one. You do not have to go and tell him or her everything, feel them out see if this is the person you can entrust with your predicament, when you feel right discuss the problems your experiencing. You have already supplied the correct answer, talking to the Lecturer of the class you are suppose to give the assessment about, ask the counsellor if they will Advocate for you,which will give you a bit of confidence. Lecturers are not ogres they themselves were students at one time they will understand. Good-luck keep me posted.

Answer 5

Oakay, first thing you need to do is go to the uni councillor or student support person and tell them exactly what is going on.

Explain how you are feeling, just tell them exactly wha you have said here and they will help you. They can arrange meetings with your lecturers and discuss the best possible approach.

It may be best if you suspended your course and return after the summer. You could take the time to sort yourself out. Move back home to your parents for a while, let the help you. Spend time with friends and remember who you are and what you want to get out of life.

You should also go see your doctor as it sounds as if you may be depressed. Again explain how you feel and as for help - maybe they could recommend a councillor you could see.

You need to step back from the whole situation and find out why you feel the way you do, that way you can start to recover and move on.

Take care and good luck.

Answer 6

It sound to me as though you may be suffering from depression. This happens to a lot of students at some point during their studies, so don't feel alone! I would suggest that you go to your doctor and expain what is going on to them, and once you have done this, go to your tutor and explain to them how you are feeling, and that you really want to be able to overcome your problems. I think you'll find your tutor to be sympathetic, as it is not an uncommon problm, and if you have a letter from your doctor, or a prescription to back what you are telling the tutor up, then so much the better!!!!
I recently completed a degree, and i was much the same as you at one point. You need to learn to believe in yourself, and you need to tell your family and friends how bad you're feeling right now and LET THEM HELP YOU!!!!!

Best wishes!! xx

Answer 7

Yeah I had that same problem, that sounds exactly like my first year or two... I was depressed and had ADHD. Medication really helped with both, especially the ADHD (the one you're less likely to have thought about... depression is kinda obvious). Since being on Ritalin I have not once gone to class and realised an assignment was due that day that I didn't even know about! Yay! It helps so much with the dreading and putting off going to class thing too. You should really think about it...

Answer 8

Listen sweetheart,
Everybody feels 'down' or 'low in mood' at times - and is natural, you seem to be suffering from an extension of that - Its called depression and I know... Ive been there and come out the other side OK.
Please confide in a friend and ask them to go to your GP ( and sit in the waiting room) with you.
You need to get yourself checked out.
You are not mad
You are not a waster
Uni life is stressful
Coursework is stressful
Get yourself to your GP for help and ask for some counselling from a professional counseller

Respect and love to you

Answer 9

Have you been to see your doctor? I really think you should talk to somebody. Why don't you go and see the head of your uni, and explain how you have been feeling , and that you haven't got the confidence to speak to your lecturer as you don't know how to put your feelings into words. Maybe your head of uni will have a word with all your lecturers for you to make them aware of what is going on, You can not go on like this you need help and advice please go and seek it. GOOD LUCK. X

Answer 10

I think you might be surprised how understanding your lecturer will be. However I don't think your lecturer is necessarily the right person to approach. In every department there will be a person who is there for people who have problems with their courses. This might be your tutor or it might be someone higher up. If you don't know who to approach then ask the secretaries "who do I go to if I am having problems with my courses?"

Counselling might be the best way to deal with your problem but speak to someone at the university first and ask for their advice.