gonna need some smart people on this one?

Question

I have a long distance relationship with my gf. In dec I was at her place in boston when I found an email from her to another guy saying "we're not doing too good at this" and "got your vm, but my bf was here..you could have gotten me killed" and "still feeling guilty, more that I hit on this off the market guy on a daily basis" and "call me tonight...I will be alone". Anyway...I called her out on this and she said it was a flirty friendship, he lives in another state and he has a gf. she says nothing ever happened, just phone calls. I asked her to call him to prove it, she said no. I asked her to send him an email to cut it off..she lied and sent it to a fake address. She even told me he was black to throw me off (I know she only likes white guys), turns out he is white. Anyway. I know in my heart she is lying, but NEED proof. How can I get the proof? She deny's everything now. I just need to know if they slept together or hooked up. She likely already told him not to say anything

Answer 1

Dude, quit being pathetic, she's cheating on you, if this isn't enough proof for you, nothing will convince you. Dump her and move on.

Answer 2

You don't need proof. She's dancing, and it isn't the cha cha.

Break off the relationship and move on with your life. If she has any serious feelings toward you she may try to get back in your good graces. How you handle that--if it happens--is entirely up to you.

But you can't trust her, and you need proof to trust her, not to distrust her.

Tell her it's been fun, but it's over and move on. Find someone else. Someone better. Shouldn't be that hard to do.

Answer 3

This girl is "friendly flirting" behind your back? What more proof do you want. She isn;t being honest with you and upfront, shes been lying about something...

What would you be ok with for proof? A website with photos? Not going to happen.

"I know in my heart she is lying." Thats proof enough for me.

Answer 4

If you are already having trust issues, then it is not even worth it..Chances are that she has had a physical relationship with him..You know in your heart she is lying and you probably already know that she has cheated. Just break it off and move on, it is not worth the stress..

Answer 5

You pretty much have all the proof you need.

"still feeling guilty,'' was the major thing. There's not many things you can feel gulity about. And if won't cut it off or prove herself right then she's lieing to you.

Answer 6

If you don't trust her why not just cut her loose. You really blew it when you went snooping into her private email. She's not your wife, Not your possession so you really have no right to go snooping. Whether she has cheated or not really isn't the point...You might also want to heed the old addage "be careful what you look for, you just might find it". Obviously you went looking for something and found it and now you want to blame her...

Answer 7

The writing's on the wall.
Even if they haven't slept together yet...
it doesn't sound like she's got monogamous intentions, so if that's important to you, then it sounds like irreconcilable differences. Move on...plenty of fish in the sea. This one's a waste of energy.

Answer 8

And why waste the energy?? Once a cheater always a cheater. Cut your losses now and move on!!!! There are plenty of women out there--who don't resort to such childish games/behavior...and you shouldnt resort to playing at her level. GET OVER IT, you'll thank yourself later!!!!!!

Answer 9

The best advice i can tell you on this long distance relationship is it is not going to work... no communitcation and no trust..... let it go, i am sure you can find someone else who will be worth your time... good luck

Answer 10

What proof do you want.Your not building a court case.
It's your feelings ,trust ,respect, gone. She lied .Your call.
Best of luck