For men only...?

Question

Okay gentleman... Got a question for you!

I'm dating a really great guy. He's the type who likes to show his care and feelings with how he treats me. He treats me wonderful and full of respect. Which is great. But, like every female who's ever walked the earth. I want to hear it. And is like pulling teeth when talking about feelings. So... what is the best way to approach a guy, and get him to talk about what's in his heart and share what's in mine, without being a psyco nag!?

Okay. I am happy with him. And, I know I'm blessed. But, if the subject of feelings is avoided like the plaege, it makes a girl worry that it's because... there aren't any deep feelings. Unless someone is able to set you straight with words... sometimes you have to assume.... and you know that can be a dangerous avenue.

I SEE STUPID PEOPLE... I believe your looking in the mirror.

Answer 1

Patience id the key darlin', patience and honesty. The hardest thing in the word for most guys to do is to be vulnerable, and that is what you are asking him to do. Which is not a bad thing, just realize that what it is you asking of him.
Also i would suggest you check out a book call the five languages of love, it is a great book that deals with the different ways people express their love and the reason why sometimes it goes unheard. One of the hardest thing for anybody to understand is what makes me feel loved doesn't mean it makes someone else feel loved. He can do all the right things but if he isn't saying i love you in your love language it isn't gonna do him much good. The book also has different exercises do better express your love in all five love languages. So i would talk to him and ask him to read the book with you and be patient as you learn to speak each others love language.

Answer 2

Break up with him... then he'll be more than willing to share how awful he feels. jk

Honestly, what do you want to hear? If he is treating you well and respectfully, than he respects you and probably cares a great deal about you. Talk is cheap with guys... I can blather sweet stupidity to get a girl into bed, but I'll display how I really feel through spending titme and treating her well.

Ask direct questions which can be reasonably answered and don't come across as relationship tests. Ask about facts and events, then move on to feelings: "What was the highlight of your day?"... "Anything rough at work today?" then ask for details, then ask how he feels about the whole thing. Be specific and relate have him detail the stress/pleasure in his life, the move to emotional responses to those events. Really, guys don't get much out of the sharing feelings thing, but its clearly important to you ladies. Guys often mistake it for girls wanting to see their vulnerablity (which I guess is the point at some level)... as I said earlier, talk is cheap.

You could ask him to seduce you for fun if you want to hear how wonderful you are. If he's got any game, I'm sure he'll be willing to share it if properly motivated.

Answer 3

Hi Lil

Thats gona be hard but lets try to get through this one.
Well what I think you should do is to have a romantic dinner and then go sit in the living room light up some candles play soft gentle music kiss him softly, this will make him think that your up to something, when he wants to do something tell him no, first tell me whats going on in your mind tell me what you feel in your heart please. And when he is done then your turn tell him whats going on in your mind and heart. Once your done well then you got the info you wanted and the rest of the night well thats your choice. Just make sure that you appreciate the fact that he opend up to you. And if the whole thing doesnt work then you should sit down with him and just tell himthat its bothering you.

Hope everything works out for you. All the best.

Answer 4

Pull away. If he becomes uncertain of YOUR feelings for him, you will see him open up. As long as you are certain his feelings for you real, he will respond quite quickly. Don't lavish him with your feelings, let him start to doubt. It's hard to do, because people for some reason think to get someone to love you, you must lavish all amounts of affection on the other person. Doesn't work. Works to the opposite. You want a way for him to express his feelings for you. Then hold back yours. Let him start doubting. But beware, what he turns into may turn you off.

Answer 5

Ask yourself how long have you been going out. Too short of a time he is not going to tell you. A long time and he still does not tell you, he doesn't really love you and is using you. Have a deep conversation with him in a romantic setting, simply as taking walk together.

Find don't look at your relationship.

Answer 6

How about instead of obsessing like a 12 year old about when he's ever going to spill his heart out to you and confess his undieing love, instead try spilling your heart out to him instead and therefor opening the door for any and everything he wants to say to you...

What is this really about, is it about someone YOU really care for or is it about your little fantasy ego trip of hoping a guy is falling for you?

Edit:
Awww did I touch a nerve? Truth hurts doesn't it.

Answer 7

I don't understand what you want to hear from him. Do you want him to say he loves you, or are you trying to get him to talk about his feelings? If you want him to say he loves you then just talk to him about it. If you want him to talk about his feelings you'll probably have to ask him about them. I doubt he'll just come out and tell you his feelings. If you ask him how he feels about something in paticular, then he might tell you.

Answer 8

That is something hat he will talk about when he is feeling it in his heart, if he is not saying anything, then he is not feeling it..He will when he is ready

Answer 9

diffrent people express their feelings diffrent ways. maybe he just needs time, but if you really like him, and he's only dating you, then just try to concentrate on being happy with what you have, not trying to get him to say something, i mean you said he's a great guy.

Answer 10

just take things slow and go with the flow.. Stop trying to force things and take what he does share with you that much more specially.