We have been friends for a couple months now. We have spent alot of time together and I think we get along really well and have fun together. Heres the thing, she is going through a divorce right now. but thats not even the big thing. Prior to her getting married, her fiance who is not her current husband, was killed during the war. She says her friends rushed her into the relationship with her husband, and it obviously didn't work out and was awful. She has a son now who i really like and thats a big thing for me since i don't think i can can have a kid myself (i think i'm sterol ) Anyway, shes at the point now that she tells me she is not ready. I don't know if i believe her. If shes telling the truth i would wait however long it took i really care about her, but if she's lying then i'm done with her. I just want to know. Any help would be awesome, any details needed i can give.
2007-02-28 17:13:31 · 9 answers · asked by anthony 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
she has gone on dates with other people after she seperated with her husband, but she hasn't done anything with anyone besides me for about a month since we started hanging out. i want to know now,i don't want to get attached and then have her say we are only gonna be friends. Any thoughts on that?
2007-02-28 17:51:58 · update #1
Well, if you really care about her, you will give her the benefit of the doubt and wait as long as it takes..Time will tell if she feels the same or bullshiTTing you..Good luck
2007-02-28 17:20:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since she is going through a divorce, then give her sometimes to heal. Don't rush her into anything just yet. The relationship that you have with her seems fine, so keep it that way by be there when she needed you or support her in whatever way that you can. In the long run she will make the decision if she wanted to give you a chance? To me she already did give you chances, by you are both spending a lot of time together. But make sure that she is not leading you on in different way, or playing you and her husband both as the same time. What she couldn't get it at home from her husband, that she has to go and get it elsewhere? And that might be from you. If you know what I mean? Be helpful to her but as the same time be smart for yourself. Good luck to you.
2007-03-01 01:28:10 · answer #2 · answered by Lilian 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
her getting out of a marriage with a child is a big thing. If she tells you shes not ready, than thats very much possibly true. If she was rushed into that relationship, why would she divorce and than rush so quickly into another one. even if its with someone she cares for. be understanding and patient. my strategy would be to show how you really enjoy spending time with her child, and in turn she will get the picture that you are a committed person who is not just wanting her for a relationship but wants the whole package. a family. patience is key in earning her trust, and then eventually earning her love.
2007-03-01 01:19:20 · answer #3 · answered by Charlie H 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There is a good chance that she could be scared because of her prior situation and also not wanting to jump into anything she is not ready for, but I have learned from experience that it takes the right person to make you ready not the right time.
2007-03-01 01:18:22 · answer #4 · answered by LAH 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hmm...don't rush her. Wait. She might be ready or she might not. You don't know what she really is thinking. Give her a bit of time and space and let her think. If she just rush into things it'll end quick. Let her take as much time as she needs. Maybe she might be ready but let her tell you. Don't rush her because you might lose her.
2007-03-01 01:19:03 · answer #5 · answered by PWD 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i think u cud give her some more time to think on her own.. what she had been experienced is really painful.. but dont give up, if u really like her then dont leave her, stay friends w/ her but dont expect too much that she will love u back.. perhaps, she just need someone to lean on & who knows in the end if u stay friends w/ her, she might love u as well... nothing is sure but as of now, i suggest u just stay by her side..
2007-03-01 01:24:41 · answer #6 · answered by sweet_MJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you mentioned yourself that she was rushed into her last relationship with her ex-husband. since she's still in the process of the divorce, she doesn't want to rush into things. believe her, take your time if it's worth it.
2007-03-01 01:19:34 · answer #7 · answered by kill_kiddo 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Check out the Babel-Fish of love.
¨I´m not ready¨ = ¨You´re a really nice guy.....for someone else !¨
I.E. At least she likes you enough to not want to hurt your feelings
2007-03-01 01:23:31 · answer #8 · answered by cosmicvoyager 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude she's got a son and he should be number one in her life not you he needs her more then she needs you back off and find a single woman with no kids you will be better off for sure.
2007-03-01 01:19:11 · answer #9 · answered by 4stringthndr 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋