can you make a limerick?

Question

whoever has the best one will be 'best answer'.

Answer 1

There once was an artist named Saint,
Who swallowed some samples of paint.
All shades of the spectrum
Flowed out of his rectum
With a colourful lack of restraint.

Answer 2

There was an old lady from Steen,
Whose musical sense was not keen.
She said that it's odd,
that I can not tell God Save the Weasel
from Pop goes the Queen.

Answer 3

there once was a man from Peru
who bent down to tie up his shoe
what he came to find as he exposed his behind
is that someone had turned it all black and blue

There once was a man from Nantucket,
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin,
As he wiped off his chin,
If my ear were a c*** I would F**K it!





John said, "My knowledge of sex does not suck,
"And I've researched the best things to F**K.
"Sheep are too easy,
"And chickens are greasy.
"Yes, the best F**K of all is a duck!"

There once was a hooker named Sue,
Who filled her vagina with glue.
When they paid to get in,
She said with a grin,
You must pay to get out of it too!





There once was a woman named Monica.
Bill met her on the first day of Hannukah.
She wore a beret,
And didn't have much to say.
But man, could she play the harmonica!

The President swore to the sky
He'd never asked someone to lie.
But the chance was then missed,
To request that he list,
Positions he'd told them to try.





There once was a young man named Bruno,
who said, "F**King is one thing I do know.
"Sheep are just fine,
"And women devine,
"But, llamas are numero uno!"

There once was a fellow named Dave,
Who kept a dead whore in a cave.
I have to admit,
She smelled like s**t,
But, think of the money he saved!





There was a fellow named Frick,
Who performed an incredible trick.
With careful gyrations,
To standing ovations,
He'd balance himself on his d**k!

(This is a physics limerick)
There once was a fellow named Frisk,
Whose stroke was exceedingly brisk.
So fast was his action,
That the Lorenz contraction,
Reduced his tool to a disk!





There once was a talented terrier,
Who liked to bite girls in the derrierre.
With a yip and a yap,
He'd snip and he'd snap,
And the fairer the derrierre the merrier!
(How about a couple cheezy skiing limericks?)
There once was a skier from Aspen,
Who was seen going down in a fast spin.
He careened out of sight,
Screaming, "Hey, on your right!"
Now, it's, "Open the door, let my cast in."




There once was a talented elephant,
Who schussed to the base for the hell of it.
There, he tried the glühwein,
Then left sitzmarks behind,
That make yours and mine look irrelevant.

Answer 4

There once was a girl named Alex C.
Who asked questions on Yahoo to confuse me.

I answered them well,
so Alex could tell,

She must give ten points to me.

Answer 5

There once was a pauper from china
who was not a very good clima,
he tripped on a rock
and chopped off his cock,
now he has a vagina

Answer 6

There was a young plumber of Leigh
Who was plumbing a maid by the sea.
Said the maid, “Cease your plumbing,
I hear someone coming.”
Said the plumber, still plumbing, “It's me.”


: )

Answer 7

There once was a guy who lived in peru
he knew how to fly a shoe
he flew so high he touched they sky
then no one ever saw him again. boo hoo

Answer 8

there once was a guy with his pet the fly went away and the guy eat pie all day