ok, fyi im not a teen, im 24. u know how u can get into those long drawn out on and off relationships with a person that u know is bad for you but just cant seem to stay away from? its like a magnet its ridiculous. i tried so many times. it doesnt help that i work with the person, see them everyday and we are completely intertwined in eachother's lives. we've said lets just be friends, and it works for a couple of weeks but then the tension builds up and we end up hooking up again. i dont wanna lose him as a friend (partly because he is my only friend at work and my only entertainment). its also bad because i look to him just to have someone to hang out with, i dont go out that much with my friends. some say i should get a hobby. some say i should just get another man, but its not like i can just snap my fingers and make one appear! i dont know how much longer i can take the hooking up but with no commitment -hes a huge flirt and i get jealous (hes been w/ other grls)any thoughts?
2007-02-28 13:04:31 · 7 answers · asked by SweetDarlin' 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Although it sounds like you care about this guy - I think to ever be able to break off the "hooking up" part of the relationship that you will have to Not be around him so much. Maybe you could take a class or something to meet some new people. When you are so attracted to someone and you are around that person all the time you will have to have willpower made of steel to stay away from him. Somehow you need to get out and meet other people - Good Luck to you.......
2007-02-28 13:10:59 · answer #1 · answered by sydney 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to try either getting transferred to a different place at work. Or move your desk away from him. Then you really need to end this close friendship with him. Just say your respectful hello, and move on. Find some things that can occupy your mind, and heart. Do volunteer work, for kids who are going through serious problems. Be a mentor for someone. Go out with other co-workers for lunch. Make the first steps with them. Then you will of widened out, and you won't have to talk only to him.
This guy is a player, and not ready for a real relationship yet. Don't get played by him any more. It will hurt for awhile to see him with other girls, but eventually you will get over it. Especially if you find a new guy friend, or boyfriend.
2007-02-28 13:22:20 · answer #2 · answered by woman of steel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The questions you have to ask yourself is.....do you want more from him? Do you want to have an exclusive relationship with him? Are you in love with him?
If those answers are yes......then you have to be willing to completely stop hooking up with him......you have to breakup with him in your mind....put him in a little box in the back corner of your mind....really close your eyes and put him in the box and then put the box in a corner.....a deep corner.
At that point when you begin to be able to breathe again and he tries to hook up...you will actually be able to laugh about it with him, but he's in the box so there's no hooking up.
TWO THINGS CAN THEN HAPPEN
He will wake up and realize that he likes you a lot more than he thought, or he will not keep trying to hook up.
It's also very important to not act wimpy.
You can't change who you are when you meet someone
you've got to share the loving person that you are...
BUT FIRST
you have to believe that you are a loving person
before anyone else can truly love you....
and the way you know that you are loving person is by
the things you do (center)
the things you say (throat)
the things you think (head)
and by the things you believe(soul)
and most important of all....
keep remembering something you already knew
YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING THAT HAPPENED BEFORE THIS MOMENT RIGHT NOW.
it's a new start for you.....right now.
Everything will be fine...
if you let you shine
2007-02-28 13:40:53 · answer #3 · answered by Michael Timothy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well jus look at it :: {hes a huge flirt and i get jealous (hes been w/ other grls)} :: do he jus come around wen he wants 2 or does he stick around 4good :: if u gon deal wit him then maybe u should jus have him on the side and Yes meet new people :: as u can see it isnt botherin him 2 see & meet others!! if i was u i would jus take a step at a time and really think about wat u wanna do wit him!!!
Good Luck
2007-02-28 13:26:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u have to make up ur mind and stick to it just forget him and let him go after a while then u can t hink about being friends but until ur over it being friends isnt going to work
2007-02-28 13:08:59 · answer #5 · answered by Robert C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes you need a hobby and new friends and boyfriends, go find you one and just be friends with that guy or quit talking to him period. you need to forget him totally or just learn to live with what he does, one or the other
2007-02-28 13:08:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
getting over someone is hard to do cause my boyfriend just break up with me in i couldn't even get over him or maybe he need some time to his self
2007-02-28 13:09:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋