Should I ask my father to come live with us?

Question

He's old and alone. He has hinted that he wants to come live with me and my family, but I wanted to hear the Pros and Cons from people who have let their elderly parents move in with their families. Especially if you have children, how did they react or adjust? I have one in her 20s, 19 year old daughter, and 14 year old son.

Your advice please?

Answer 1

Having a parent move in with your family is a very big adjustment for all involved!! Are you sure that he is hinting? Maybe he just wants more companionship. Someone to sit and chat with him. Someone to take him out of his house and maybe go for a drive, go to a play or movie. If he is able to care for himself and there are no health, safety or financial issues then there may be no need to change his residence. Maybe he is lonely and wants to see and talk to people. Are there any senior programs in the area that he would like to attend?

Answer 2

Your children are old enough to adapt to whatever you decide. The pros would be you would not have to worry about him as much. Does he get around on his own? Can he still drive? His quality of life would be better since he would have someone around to help him. If money matters are an issue, then it would help him out with his bills also. The cons just depend on how much he would depend on your help. If he does not need constant supervision, then the cons would be having one more when you go out to dinner and do other things as a family. Of course, considering it is your father, as long as your spouse supports you in whatever decision you make, then I would not consider the cons but do whatever it took to make my father happy. If that meant him moving in with me, that's what I would do.

Answer 3

wellit depends, is he haveing a hard time and struggling on his own? does your house hold enough room to suport all of you? Do you and your family in the house get along with him well? It will probably help him out though