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I am mum to 2 children, Joshua who is 5 and Natalie who is 9 weeks. My partner is the biological dad to my daughter. I am finding his mum to be very over powering and I am scared of her. She says stuff to my boyfriend about me like "I am only happy if my side of the family sees Natalie" I have no transport and my mum sees my kids when she comes to visit, my partners mum moans about this yet she makes no effort to come over (she has a car) and she doesnt even live in this town.

I have a fear of answering the phone incase she is on the other end as she gets drunk and goes on and on at me - all of this is causing problems with me and my boyfriend

I need some advice as this is getting me down - can any one help

2007-02-28 09:51:43 · 8 answers · asked by Dani 1 in Family & Relationships Family

8 answers

first off...if she calls again drunk...tell her that you will speak to her when she's sober but not when she's drunk, then hang up...if she calls back, ignore it...don't allow this woman to bully you...don't be scared of her either, she knows you are scared of her that's why she's doing it.... stand up to her, tell her that she can come see Natalie when she likes, but your mother can only see her when she gets the chance...tell her that if she was that bothered she would come and see the baby every day, having a car and all.....i had trouble with my ex MIL too and eventually i learned how to stand up to her, i too was scared of her and she knew it, she soon backed down when i got in her face about her attitude, tell your boyfriend to have a word with her over the drunken phone calls...tell him that you fear answering because it may be her, if i were you i would get an answering machine and have it take the calls, you don't have to pick up if you don't want to.....don't allow that woman to bully you...try and stay away from her as much as possible....your boyfriend should have words with her about this, tell him it has to stop

2007-02-28 12:44:08 · answer #1 · answered by Dazzlebox 7 · 0 0

Get call and display on the phone, I have it and it only costs £1 a month. Will not completely get rid of the problem but gives you choices as whom you answer the phone to. In her case I would either let it ring out or pass to your partner......you can always put the phone on silent if the kids are asleep. Also so soon after giving birth you may be a bit down and she is not helping matters. It's your partner's mum and he really is the one who should be dealing with this problem. After all if he wants to take Natalie to visit his mum I am sure you do not tie him to a chair that he can't go. Perhaps this is a better idea than telling her she could come and visit like your mum..............you may not get rid of her!

2007-02-28 10:38:19 · answer #2 · answered by Ms Mat Urity 6 · 0 0

I have the same type of mother in law the only difference is I don't have children yet. I dreed the day that comes. Not having children just dealing with her. The one thing I learned from my mom is there is always going to be something with her she will always be a pain in the a** you just have to learn to pick your battles. Somethings you will have to let go and sometimes she will need to be put in her place. She needs to know she is not boss.

2007-03-03 10:23:44 · answer #3 · answered by BabyDolll128 3 · 0 0

Dani if you have big feet dont be afraid to stomp them .The next time the dragon rings widen your vocal cabulary and be firm ,all bullys thrive on power now it is your turn to be assertive ,see how good that feels .Your man needs to wake up quickly before the harm is irrepaireable .Show her you are no push over. good luck

2007-02-28 10:30:40 · answer #4 · answered by not a mused 3 · 1 0

Are you able to ask your boyfriend to speak with her? It really is his place to address it with her since YOU are the woman in his life now!

2007-02-28 10:07:48 · answer #5 · answered by ibchupacabra 1 · 0 0

Tell your partner to grow some balls and tell his mom to shut up and mind her own business.

2007-02-28 10:14:35 · answer #6 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 2 0

well i think you need to take on board all the advice you receive. you do need to stand your ground with your mother-in-law it is not her life it's yours. don't be afraid of her as she will continue to behave in this way. be STRONG

2007-02-28 10:47:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

ask here

2007-02-28 10:26:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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