He works in my Department. I am 25 and I know he finds me attractive - by the way he intensely looks at me. I want to make a move..but how do I go about doing this?
Do I tell him, show him? If so, what do I say??
2007-02-28 09:43:01 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
1) Don' think the age span is too wide. Others have been successful in relationships with people more than 15 years difference.
2) If you decide to give it a go, simply ask him if he would like to have a cup of coffee or tea.
3) If he is really interested, he will probably sieze the opportunity to get to know you better.
4) You can always opt to not take it further if it doesn't feel right.
5) In other words, I would say give it a go and see what comes of it.
--That Cheeky Lad
2007-02-28 12:35:28 · answer #1 · answered by Charles-CeeJay_UK_ USA/CheekyLad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're 25, he's 40. All you'd have to do was ask him out, and most likely he'd be there.
But I have to agree with the people who have cautioned you. If he's not married (and he'd better not be! I wouldn't even bother giving you advice if you'd date a married man) and has never been married, there's likely something wrong there. "Something wrong" meaning that he's probably a player and a lifelong bachelor. Which is fine if all you're interested in is sex, but very few people are interested in just that. If he has been married in the past, he's got a whole host of issues you're not likely to understand, and that wouldn't really be fun for either one of you.
You really should take advantage of the great opportunity you have to date people your own age. Think about it---when you're older, you're not going to be dating 25-year-olds, so this is your chance! You have at least 15 years to date 40-year-olds.
When I was 25, I started dating someone who was 35. We dated for several years, even though he was a total jerk. Eventually I realized it was pointless to keep dating him. But now I really wish I had those years back. I could have had a lot more fun dating someone my own age, and maturing alongside someone who actually had the capacity to mature!
Whatever you choose, I wish you the best of luck.
2007-02-28 15:26:44 · answer #2 · answered by blueblue 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In answer to your question, I have a question or two for you, (1) why do you ask your questions repeatedly? (yes I looked at them to help me to answer this one). Why are you obsessed with older men? Older men are usually married or in a long term relationship, while young men often are not. Young men are more likely to have similar interests to yours, and provided you choose the unattached ones, they will have more time to spend on you. If you do go for an older man, you are more likely than not to get the one night stand and cheerio. Or perhaps a brief affair, what do you want in life? There are a lot of young men out there, try getting out a bit, meet people, talk, you will find a young man who is right for you if you are in the right place. By the way, I'm a 52 year old man with a family, oldest 25, youngest 13. Be careful, life is not very forgiving. Go for personality.
2007-02-28 21:30:29 · answer #3 · answered by funnelweb 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
If hes married, i would leave well alone. Your playing in a mine field with this. The strangest things happen with love, with find someone attractive, because they give the attention that we crave for. Often, when you least expect it. Its hard to know what would be right to make a move.
I personally would offer him a coffee after work and build up a friendship, first. You may discover hes not the as nice as you fell for.
2007-03-01 08:05:53 · answer #4 · answered by lonely as a cloud 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no don't show him, just smile nicely and have a conversation. Find out what he likes and whether he is someone you want to be with. Don't just hop into bed with him - it will be all ego and power trip for him and over for you in seconds! An older man can make a great partner, genuine sincerity and maturity not found in a twenty year old chap can be great. But get to know him first.
2007-02-28 18:14:30 · answer #5 · answered by rose_merrick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be bold, take the lead. Arrange an after work drink for a gang of you. Invite him along, that will break the ice and give you the chance to send some time with him. See how it goes from there. Good luck, keep us posted!
2007-03-01 02:11:53 · answer #6 · answered by monkienutz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same as you would any guy, I'd say. Heck these days 40 ain't nuthin! And he'll sure be grown out of the little boy antics phase, that will be a real plus. Invite him for coffee is always a safe opening gambit. Go fot it!!
2007-02-28 11:09:53 · answer #7 · answered by barefoot_always 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's not married, just look back, give a little smile and look away for a short while, then look back again. You won't need words, he'll do the talking when he picks up that you're interested.
2007-03-01 09:22:58 · answer #8 · answered by Curious39 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
offering hes no longer married in basic terms ask him if he fancies going for drink or meal after artwork what worst he can say "no" he might experience bit uncomfortable first of all not often do adult men get asked out or he may well be flattered and leap at danger. he might experience comparable as you yet worried to ask in basic terms in case you became him down who is familiar with a million part of bear in mind nonetheless artwork and play can not be jumbled collectively artwork atmosphere neither of you coach favouritism in artwork shop friendship separate can artwork out
2016-11-26 20:55:22 · answer #9 · answered by stiefel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is single, that is the first question you need to get the answer to. And if yes, you simply talk to him as you do any other man in the world. Men are men, women are women. People are simply people. Good luck and God bless****
2007-02-28 12:22:43 · answer #10 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋