I want to move out. I can't afford over 400 a month for an apt.?

Question

I was gonna get on with a room mate. But if I cant my bf wants me to move in with him. (As in this weekendd). He said he would pay for everything I would only have to pay my bills I brought with me. At the end of the month I would have 500 left. I'm going to put 200 into a money market account, just in case I need money or something. I feel bad becuase if I do move in with him, I would only be able to offer 300 to the relationship. He makes WAY more money then me. But I talked to him about this and he said he didn't care he would pay. He said it wouldn't be any more if I lived there or not, so it wouldn't be a big deal. I still feel bad though. I don't want a sugar daddy. I want someone I can spend the rest of my life with. I was with him when he didn't have any money at all, and I payed for everything. He felt bad becuase I payed but I didn't care, I took care of him when he was down. He said he knows I want out of my parents house and he's willing support me to make me happy.

I'm 21 and he's 23.

Answer 1

Wow you have a really sweet guy and your not that bad of a person yourself! LOL You shouldn't feel bad at all. You have a man whose willing to pick up the pieces when they've been spilt all over the floor. He's responsible. Why not want a man whose responsible. People often mistaken good deeds and sugar daddy's for the genuine people that they really are. Some men really like to take care of home and it makes them feel even more like a man! If your happy with him and he's happy with you; I think you guys should take the next step and live life! Besides, I know you don't want anyone else to grab him up...

Answer 2

The smartest thing to do is to wait until his lease is up and then you both look for something together.

The reason for that is because then it will be an equal situation.

But, if you can not wait, do this tonight.

Write out a budget that you currently live on, include miscellaneous expenses like your morning coffees, weekends with your girl friends or anything else in an entertainment section. Include utilities, cell phones and anything else that you might have to pay.

Then from your list, weed out where you can let go of some things.

Then figure out how much it will cost to live there. If the rent is 600 a month, offer to pay 200, plus half of the utilities (electricity, gas, cable, internet, home phone ect). Make sure that you pitch in with groceries and home supplies, and then make sure that you get receipts EVEN IF its your boyfriend or pay in money orders or cheques for rent and the same for your half of the utilities.

Discuss this with him and let him know that you will not feel comfortable under any other circumstances. Even if you love him and care about him and vice versa, things CAN change when you move in with someone. Always have a safety net and always try to save at least 2% of your monthly income for emergencies.

Try http://www.forrent.com and set up a free room mate profile or if you have a close family member (a sister or a cousin ect…) or friend that is looking to move, get a place with them but on a 6 month lease so that it will give you a chance to experience living on your own and if things turn sour, its only 6 months not a full year.

Communication is important when living with someone. Talk out any possible issues before they become issues.

Money can mess up relationships and so can living together before you are ready. Make sure that you are doing what is best for you first.

Good luck
~jo~

Answer 3

Go for it. When you make more money, and you will, you can contribute more at that time. My b/f moved in with me and I made way more than him, almost double. I made him pay for 1/2 the mortgage payment and the phone bill, I paid for pretty much everything else like groceries, oil, electricity, house taxes, water/sewer, cable/Internet.

Now he has a new job and makes more, so I make him pay 1/2 of everything. It was a little stressful for me at first paying most of the bills, but obviously he couldn't afford to contribute more. Now things are great, him paying 1/2.

Answer 4

Good for you for wanting to contribute your fair share! At the same time, though, sometimes we all need a little help. You helped him when he needed it, now he's in a position to help you. So, I say, the only question remaining is do you want to live with him? If so, it's your life, of course, but I suggest giving it serious consideration. If you do move in with him, it would be important to do what you can to increase your value to the relationship, either financially, or in other ways, so that you are contributing your fair share.

Answer 5

aww thats sweet that he is willing to do that for you. I say if you really want out of your house then take his offer and like try and find a better job that pays more so you can help him out even if its a little while later just let him know that you'll do everything in ur power to help pay.

Answer 6

You don't have to be so independent. I am the same way and like to pull my own weight but there comes a time when it's ok that the man provides more. Let a man be a man! (Trust me, I find them rather hard to find, around here, they like the woman to pay everything!!)

Answer 7

I think you should give it a shot. Then you can cut back on spending and go back to school to get a better job. As long as he loves you, it shouldn't matter too much, just be sure to always contribute as much as you can.

Answer 8

I say if you were there for him when he was down let him return the favor. He's not being a sugar daddy he's just repaying your kindness.