She almost always comes during meal preparation time ( i guess to make sure I'm feeding everyone)....Once we did not go to the door because he was asleep, my child was sick and I was just tired....She tried to push my door in because I guess she knew we were there....Don't I have a right to not have company that has not called ahead?
2007-02-28 05:55:22 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You should tell this pest that you really have your hands full. You can not put up with visitors who simply drop in at inconvenient times.
Ask her to be thoughtful enough to call ahead of any visits, to make sure that you have time for a visit.
2007-02-28 06:00:25 · answer #1 · answered by kiwi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely, you have a right to privacy. She sounds like she doesn't have a life of her own if you ask me and is living life through you.
And maybe she shows up at meal time cause she wants to freeload.
I don't know what her control issues are in your case. But, that is wrong to feel like you have to open the door and let her in.
Now you can handle this any way that you want.
But, I am a pretty forward person. And it is your house, and your husband, which, I am sorry but that takes presedence over sister, and your dinner. And she should have the respect to call before just coming over. I expect that of my friends and relatives. I always look to see who is knocking on my door. And if I am not expecting them, they don't get in.
I have even done the "Not Home" thing when my mother comes calling unexpectedly, as she usually just wants me to do something for her and I don't do favors unless I have been asked ahead of time and know about it. No surprises for me. And everyone knows it.
I am not saying I am the queen or something, it's just that it is just common respect to let people know that you are dropping by. You don't know what any one person plans are at any given time, and you should never assume that you can just take their time without notice.
But, you can do the "Noone's Home" thing if you don't want confrontation. But, I found the best way is just to tell people your rules.
Don't worry, the world won't explode, and so what if she tells the rest of the family. It usually works out that the other family members have the same problem with that person and will side with you anyway. And if they don't, well, at least you'll get your point across and stop the madness. Good luck!!
2007-02-28 06:52:29 · answer #2 · answered by Harley Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even the Federal Government cannot invade your privacy. You need to tell your husband to gently lay down some guidelines regarding his sisters visits. If he fails to do so, inform him that you will, and, you may not be as gentle about it as he may have hoped. Dropping in unannounced at meal time is not only considered rude, it is an invasion of intimate family time around the table. If his sister plans to continue her present behavior, inform her that she will not be allowed to enter your home without a phone call requesting permission to come over. Childlike behavior, requires a disciplined response, regardless of the age of the offender. If she comes to the table, set the table for the family, and, inform her that she will be more than welcome to wait in the living room, until you have completed your time at the table with your family. And, if that isn't to her liking, then, she may excuse herself and go home. Be sure that you have talked this over with your husband, and, that he fully understands the action that you will be taking. You, don't want him to be sending mixed messages to his sister, and, making it appear that you are not solid on this issue.
You didn't state what the age of the sister is, marital status, etc. But, you might encourage her to join in on the serior meal programs available through her community. Or, suggest she start going to dinner with some of her friends, join a ladies lodge group, The Red Hat Society, or, any number of groups that gather for fellowship and dining. Don't forget to suggest the fellowship of a Bible Believing Church. If she finds some outside interests, hopefully the problem will be reduced.
Good luck And God Bless!
2007-02-28 06:41:49 · answer #3 · answered by Pastor Jeff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you would prefer if she will call before she shows up and then if she comes over without the call, don't answer the door. My friends and family know that if you drop by without calling you will not gain entrance. Let her do that a few times and she will get the point.
2007-02-28 06:14:56 · answer #4 · answered by moe497 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say tell her like it is. That witch has NO right to drop in whenever and invade your family. Yes her brother may be disabled but he did make the decision to have a fmily of his own, not with his sister. Good luck
2007-02-28 06:23:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd ask her to call ahead so she can spend some time with your husband and see if she wants to help you out with things -- maybe she can help with laundry or something? Maybe in her own annoying way she is trying to be helpful to you but doesn't know how.
Everyone needs some free time, especially you. I hope you get this situation resolved and I admire your strength in taking care of your family.
2007-02-28 06:05:41 · answer #6 · answered by Denise 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to call first. You have a right to privacy and a right to tell her you when don't want her there. I've never liked it when people show up unannounced. I almost kicked someone out of my home when he showed up and started yelling at me.
If it gets to be a real problem, take legal action. You and your family have a right not to be hassled, regardless of who she is.
2007-02-28 06:00:40 · answer #7 · answered by Moon Crystal 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you do tell her that she needs to call before she comes over and that sometimes you need a break. Having company every night is very stressful nad that if she cant accept that.... deal with it.
2007-02-28 06:27:44 · answer #8 · answered by JJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when she stops u can just tell her that u r busy and cannot have any visitors at the moment.... it is not wrong and it is not rude .... its your home and u have the right to relax in some piece and quiet when ever u want .... u have to let her call first to see if u can accept her visit .... that should be simple and convenient
2007-02-28 06:10:22 · answer #9 · answered by enasshalaan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My girl you have every right....and if that happens again...go to take her to court if you have tooo..it seems to me that that is just like abuse...and you dont need to put with her bull*#@t, barging into your home, she has no right in doing that...if i were you...i would say to her....''I don't care if you are his brother!!!! He is my husband, and the father of our kids...if you want to come over and chech up on him...WELL THEN PLEASE CALL US BEFORE COMING OVER...OTHERWISE I MAY HAVE TO PUT A STOP TO THIS ABUSE...AND HARASSMENT AND BRING YOU TO COURT...CAUSE I DONT NEED TO PUT WITH YOUR BULL!@#t LADY!!! I HAVE ENOUGH ON MY PLATE ..AND THERE ANIT ANY MORE ROOM FOR YOU TO COME ON!!!!!!
thats what i would say....hope this help you..and please let me know how things work out ok..
Mary
2007-02-28 06:04:01 · answer #10 · answered by mary_parenteau 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋