Yes, they can both come with time- if you're ready for them to, and if you believe that this person is truly worthy of your trust and forgiveness. Some people are. We all make mistakes- but the determining factor here, I guess, is whether it was a one-time mistake. Give yourself time to heal, and DEFINITELY guard your heart- when trust has been broken, it has to be re-earned...and that, too, only comes with time. Good luck!
2007-02-28 05:43:51
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answer #1
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answered by journalismgal 3
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I think a lot depends on the circumstances: the kind of lie it was, the way the liar acted when confronted with their untruthfulness, whether the lie was part of a pattern of behavior, and the intention of the lie. And of course, how much you value having this person in your life.
I think you need to make a realistic assessment of these facts before you can decide whether forgiveness is warranted. Was the lie, taken in context, an absolute dealbreaker in the relationship? Something that realistically you can't forgive or forget, you can only dismiss the person and move on?
I think we all need to accept that we can be wrong about people: we can be too forgiving of someone who does not deserve forgiveness, or too unforgiving of someone who deserves another chance. Which way would we prefer to err, if we allow that we're capable of making a mistake?
There are so many factors here. But I think that if you are honest with yourself and consider all the factors, you can probably come to a decision that you can live with. Because in the end, that's all that counts: what YOU feel, what YOU can live with.
Good luck.
2007-02-28 13:57:39
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answer #2
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answered by Karin C 6
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God tells us to forgive, but He doesn't say we have to forget about it. If fact, the new information helps you be more discerning. Meaning, if a trust was broken, then trust has to be earned back. It's like a puppy who is being potty trained. We think he is trained and then one day he goes on the carpet. We then have to back up our trust and watch him closely and not let him go anywhere he wants until he has regained our trust again.
We forgive people more for our own benefit than for the other person.... otherwise it can eat you alive. That doesn't mean the hurt goes away instantly. That does take time. I've always found that praying for the person who hurt me helps.
2007-02-28 13:53:21
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answer #3
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answered by Hope 3
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When someone has lied to you, it depends what they lied about. Ofcourse with time either you'll forgive them, or just forget all about them because it doesn't affect your life anymore, but to answer your question, if you can forgive them for what they lied about then yes it does take time. Girls can forgive, but never forget. Guys can't forgive but they do forget.
2007-02-28 13:41:09
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answer #4
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answered by astoriansk8rgurl 2
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When someone lies to me I don't feel like I can ever trust them again. I try but I always have what they did before in the back of my mind. It never goes away.
2007-02-28 13:49:44
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answer #5
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answered by Jen_n_TX 3
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They must earn back both.....Usually, you give people your trust, and then when they break it, you don't just want to forgive them and retrust them. They must be willing to put in a great deal of effort to gain it back, and then yes, both come back given time and actually seeing them caring enough to try.
2007-02-28 13:39:09
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answer #6
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answered by pilotmanitalia 5
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yep. Of course in this time period they have to earn it back. Bigger the lie more they have to earn back
2007-02-28 13:38:27
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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Depends on many, many factors. That's all I'll say on this subject.
2007-02-28 13:42:25
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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idk....seems like people lie to cover up more lies.
2007-02-28 13:40:37
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answer #9
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answered by Scorpius59 7
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