We go out to a lot of events and I often include her children. I enjoy being able to do this, but I am a teacher and don't make much money. I am now starting to struggle with finances because about 20% of my salary is going to taking her out all the time. She is very traditional and I am not sure how she would feel about this issue.
2007-02-28 03:54:02 · 6 answers · asked by Alchemist 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
As directly as I can respond: Yes. She is not your child, she is your girlfriend. She must put forth some effort (and cash) as well. I understand if she is financially strapped, but that is when you both have to make conscious decisions to curb your spending on each other. The fact you are making the effort to not only involve her in your life, but her children as well should be rewarded. It sounds like either she is either unaware of the strain it is putting on you or doesn't care. I hope the former as it can be resolved. If it is the later, I am sorry you've wasted so much time, effort, and money.
2007-02-28 05:05:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, she should help out with the bill from time to time, even if she only pays part of the the bill. It is real inconsiderate for her to not realize that you pay all the time. I think the best way to approach her is to joke about how she is putting you in the poor house because you pay all the time. This way you guys can start to discuss it without it being a serious conversation that could lead to an argument. I have been with my girlfriend for about 4 years now and we alternate who pays the bill most the time. For the 1st year or so I paid when we went out. If she acknowledges & appreciates that you do pay for everything than that is a good sign. She may not have that much money to spend on going out. If that is the case maybe you guys could stay in and cook or have activities at each others houses. If she doesn't understand after you talk to her then she isn't worth it.
2007-02-28 12:12:19 · answer #2 · answered by SanPatrick 0305 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At this point in your relationship, she should be offering to help.
When my last relationship ended after 4 years , I got the impression he thought I took advantage of him financially. I never offered to pay because in the beginning, he would adamantly refuse, so I stopped offering. That made me feel bad, because I sure wan't trying to take advantage.
I am now engaged to a wonderful guy, and after the first date, I always make a contribution, whether it's pay half, cook him dinners or just doing other things for him. I don't what him to think the same thing as the last guy.
Maybe she just assumes this is how it is supposed to be. I would lovingly talk to her about your finances-without expressly asking her to pay for some dates--hopefully she will get the idea and start making contributions.
2007-02-28 12:02:03 · answer #3 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell her...now.
This is going to sound harsh, but if she hasn't offered ONCE to pick up a bill, pay for dinner, a movie, an amusment park, she is not "traditional"; she's cheap and selfish.
...or if you feel you can't, stay in. Play a board game. Make dinner. Have her make dinner.
2007-02-28 12:00:04 · answer #4 · answered by Slimslimmer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no after two years she should help out with paying to go out it is not like your aking her to pay your bills just to go dutch every once in a while.
2007-02-28 12:00:22 · answer #5 · answered by fuller_0_2 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my guy and i take turns on who is buying, and help each out with paying
2007-02-28 12:50:32 · answer #6 · answered by scarlett13854 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋