I've asked several questions in the past if "good guys" (of which I am one) get girls. I'm a 19 year old college student, never had a gf and get spurned by all the girls. All the answers I've gotten here from girls basically say that one day, those girls will come flocking to me when they realized that the bad boys abused them.
I find this incredibly insulting. It's saying that when those girls get thrown out by their "bad boy" boyfriend, they will come to us because they think we're available and desperate. In other words, we're their second choice since they couldn't stay with the bad boys they wanted. You know what? I WOULD RATHER NEVER GET MARRIED AND DIE A VIRGIN THAN LOWER MYSELF TO THAT LEVEL!!!!! This is the way the dating game in life works? I don't need this. I don't need to settle for second best. I'm going to focus on my friends and my education/career and live a happy life from that (like several of my family members ultimately did).
2007-02-28 02:39:15 · 24 answers · asked by Steady As She Goes 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have this feeling that I'm going to be accused of being a women hater for this. But if I do, that's ok, cause the truth will come out eventually, one way or another.
2007-02-28 02:40:09 · update #1
Wow...bitter much? The answers you've been given before are right. It's kind of like why do guys always end up with hoochies and leave the good girls alone? They have to get burned by the hoochies before they realize that you can't change a hooch into a housewife. The same goes for girls with bad boys. They think they can change them. Those women are deluded and hopefully they will grow out of that. Some do, some don't. You're 19, you're young. Why are you so bitter already? You don't have to treat chicks like crap to get them to like you. Sometimes that helps but that totally depends on the girls you're going after.
I can't tell you how many times I didn't end up with a guy I liked because I didn't put out or do drugs or drink or whatever. It happens and girls aren't the only one with the "bad guy" complex. Guys love bad girls too. The only thing I can tell you is that whomever these women are that did this to you have left you totally scarred and you're obviously very bitter about it. That's a huge turnoff to women and that's could be the reason why these chicks aren't ending up with you. Your whole question is so accusatory. You're generalizing all women and all women aren't like that. Get over that already.
Don't lower yourself to whatever it is you think is beneath you. Be yourself. If someone doesn't like it, oh well. Life goes on. You're young and the girls you're going after are young. It will take them a bit of time to get their heads out of their butts. In the meantime, you're already turning into Mr Bitter. That's not attractive. You're still in school. You're still young. Focus on school for now and hook up every once in awhile. Wait until you're in the real world (college isn't the real word, dear) and then see how real women are. You're dealing with kids right now. You need to realize that and quit blaming all women for you not getting laid. It'll happen when it's suppose to. You're not even 20 yet and you're ready to give up. Life gets better, you just have to wait a bit and grow the hell up first.
2007-02-28 02:53:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Amen brother, I'm 28 and I've wondered about this same issue. Focus on your studies and making the big bucks. As for girls, majority of them say they like good guys but what they really mean is they like a bad boy who will be good to them, what the dunderheads don't realize is that bad boys are never good, thats why they are bad. But women feel that they can change these men, which is always a waste of time. Eventually you will meet a woman who has her head on straight and wants someone who is a real man, not a ****** with a motor bike and lint in his pocket.
2007-02-28 02:52:31 · answer #2 · answered by sinkablehail1978 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Understand, for some reason us women think that the bad boys are really good for us we don't realize that the good guys are really there until it's too late and the good guy is gone. Most of the women that you're probably trying to go after, no offence are probably to immature for you.
Personally, I was with a guy that was a so called bad boy, I met his friend who was/is a good guy and now we are together. I just needed to grow up to realize it and trust my instincts.
My advice, is find a more mature women and see how things go. Eventually, women my flock to you, but for now, don't give up on dating focus on your education that's what really matters in the long run. Not all women are like though.
2007-02-28 02:48:10 · answer #3 · answered by toneslilsweettease 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
WHOA!
Calm down, Sparky.
You might not have to settle for being "second best." Apparently what nobody else has told you is that there are also plenty of terrific girls running around wondering why they're surrounded by a bunch of bad boys and can't find any nice ones. These girls will not dabble with the bad boys, but will wait until they find a nice guy like YOU.
Try not to be so cynical/pessimistic. You're only 19, for heaven's sake!
2007-02-28 02:45:34 · answer #4 · answered by kcbranaghsgirl 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You misunderstood the response. The answer meant that when the "girls" grow up to become "women" they will regret the immature choices that they made in going out with the so called bad boys. Then they will desire a "good guy" to treat them right. You will already be taken by a woman who was smart enough to see that in the first place. Keep being a good guy; it will work with a smart woman, not a dumb girl.
2007-02-28 02:43:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I agree I'm a woman and get the same from men. I'd rather be single and never marry too. Career, friends and family are better investments. Let the men take the bad women and suffer and be leftover scraps in the end
2016-10-03 03:31:00 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are waiting for a woman who has never dated anyone else before you then you may have a long wait. Every person a girl dates before she ends up with the right guy just helps to shape the person she is. It makes her realize what she wants in a relationship and what she will just not accept. Not every good girl goes for the bad boy. You are making a huge generalization that is not accurate. Get your facts straight, get down off your high horse, and be on the lookout for the right girl.
2007-02-28 02:48:12 · answer #7 · answered by navy wife 1996 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
that is so not true not all women are like that. have you ever thought that there might be other reasons besides "you guys are available and desperate". ok maybeit does look bad from our part but the truth is some girls see the light after we've been 'dumped' or 'left' by our bfs we know we can do better and lets face the facts 'good guys' are better. so don't feel that way theres someone out there for every one.
2007-02-28 02:49:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
This was quite the revelation to me several years ago but it works like this...
Girls want guys to be in charge and to take the initiative. So called "bad boys" do that, but they eventually end up breaking their hearts. The reason good guys are the consolation prize is because the only time a girl goes to a good guy is when she needs someone she can trust to no "take charge" - which at that moment, would be preying on her or taking advantage of her.
At any other time than when she's heart-broken, taking charge IS NOT taking advantage of her but since good guys never take charge, they never make this connection.
Do not be the emotional crying couch and you'll get treated with a lot more respect. Trust me.
2007-02-28 02:46:21 · answer #9 · answered by arjo_reich 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Women are bitches. They just are. I'm with the best guy ever and I've never been "passed around like a joint at a rock concert." :P There IS a great woman for you out there. You just haven't found her yet.
2016-03-29 04:03:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋