Is maturity learned?

Question

I was told by an elementary school counselor, that maturity could not be learned, it was nature that made one mature. The counselor is trying to have me keep my six year old son back one year, not because of his grades, which aren't the best, but o.k. but because he is nine months younger then the rest of the class and she says he shows it. She tells me she wants me to sign the papers now, but there's still more time till the end of the year, I want them to give my son a chance, and work with him and even told them I would do more here at home to try and get him to the other kids level, but she wouldn't listen she just wants me to sign the papers to hold him back, am I being stubborn? Should I let them hold him back?

Answer 1

i think she is talking about developmental maturity which only comes with age. kids develop maturity at different rates and seeing as your son is 9 months younger than the rest of his class, he will no doubt not be as mature as other kids in his grade.there is no fault involved here, he just needs a little more time. you know him best. schools usually want parents to sign papers as early as possible so that they can be done with it and move on to the next case. you don't have to sign now. school has a few more months left. give him a little more time and see how he does. if he still isn't up to the level he needs to be, consider holding him back. it's better to do it now than later. if you have to do this in say 4th or 5th grade it will be a bit more traumatic for him. relax. he'll be fine. best of luck to you.

Answer 2

Lets think for a moment about what the school counsselor said, "that maturity could not be learned, it was nature that made one mature." In part she is correct, maturity is learned, through life experience, and is something that can't be taught. What level of maturity does she expect a 6 year old to have? How is he different (behind) from his classmates? He is a 6 year old child with the maturity level of a 6 year old child. Ask her for examples to support her claim. Will it benefit your child in anyway by holding him back, and if so how?

Maturity might not be the correct word, but it could be his level of development. A nine month difference is a huge gap between kids this age, and it is not fare to expect your child to be competing with children that are more advanced than he is. By keeping him back a year he is going to get a head start, and be more advanced than kids his age. This will be an advantage he will carry throughout his school years.

Because his life experience is 9 months less than the rest of his classmates then he can't be expected to be as mature. I would rather call it repeating a grade rather than holding him back, so that he can acquire the experience that he needs.

Answer 3

No! Defiantly not. His maturity has nothing to do with his grades or how well he keeps up with the other children.
I always had a hard time keeping up with my other class mates when i was in school but that didn't stop me from doing my best.
Your son is only 6 yrs old not 16. You're his mother and you know what's best for him. You're with him everyday and you know what he's capable of. It will only hold him back more if he's held back in school.

Answer 4

all right. maturity is something that we glean from experience. when we begin to realize that being a perverted, sick-joke-telling 3rd grader is not necessary we mature.