Dear alcohol,
First and foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holiday's hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings.
However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:
1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?
2007-02-27 22:04:40 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some stale chips (washed down with WINE and topped off with a Kit Kat after a few cheese curls and chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time.
3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black and blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.
4. Futhermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance fo out previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3 pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable.
2007-02-27 22:05:21 · update #1
Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now and would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above and address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3 pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions and hopefully we can continue this fruitful patnership.
Thank you,
Your Biggest Fan
2007-02-27 22:05:54 · update #2
lolol....cheers...its your round btw !!!
2007-02-28 09:24:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
expensive The Dancing Kitty Inc., I even have been using The Dancing Kitty Inc. to help my cats get interior the groove for 3 months now, and that i've got yet to be certain them bust a pass on the dance floor, or, greater importantly, make me rich on the county truthful. i'm questioning of annoying a reimbursement, and shifting directly to Juggling Turtle's-R-Us. Love, That_Guy
2016-11-26 20:08:39 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Excellent!
2007-02-27 23:45:15 · answer #3 · answered by wally_zebon 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Excellent matey!! superb!!
10/10 to ya an` a *
Tink xxx
2007-03-01 20:12:14 · answer #4 · answered by Tink 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like the humour contained within,amusing...
2007-02-27 22:43:09 · answer #5 · answered by rab333 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes letter to a friend was funny.
2007-02-27 22:09:57 · answer #6 · answered by Jo H 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes.. I had this afew years back on a email and found it really funny!!
Thanx for the reminder!!
:-)
xx
2007-02-27 22:21:10 · answer #7 · answered by *BURNY* 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, as humorous as your jovial little note appears, wot if the reader is a fully blown alcoholic??? Perhaps it is merely the writers cry for help.................. Congratulations if it is ........ or not...
......... :0)
PEACE
2007-02-27 22:56:00 · answer #8 · answered by Minx 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
good one. i ask myself some of these questions sometimes.
2007-02-27 22:10:05 · answer #9 · answered by Raine 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
very funny
2007-02-27 22:09:11 · answer #10 · answered by aleta_uk_0 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋