It just really upsets me because he is one of the most humble men (I thought) out there and my mother is one of the sweetest and innocent moms you can have possibly have. She can't have intercourse for a number of reasons, but I've felt sick to my stomach since I've found out, almost like I need a therapist because he is the last person in the world that I would have thought to do that, and acts so against it all the time. I don't know if I should tell my mom because I don't want to hurt her, but I am so upset and angry.. and I feel extremely uncomfortable around him all the time now. What do you guys think I should do? Help!
2007-02-27 16:48:59 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I respect all of your answers, it's just so wierd coming from the fact that he is so overprotective of me and preaches against that stuff, but then does it himself..
2007-02-27 17:16:34 · update #1
Okay maybe I should have mentioned the fact that it's hard for me to keep respect for him when he is actively involved in the church, deacon to be exact..
2007-02-28 16:44:50 · update #2
Why does this sicken you? It’s not all that abnormal. He may be your father, but he’s also a man. Many, many men find this type of thing enjoyable. And considering that he apparently has no sexual outlet through normal means (ie having sex with his wife)...
My advice…forget it! His sexual adventures (which aren't hurting a single person by the way) aren’t any of your business.
2007-02-27 17:02:08 · answer #1 · answered by kp 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would pull him aside, basically confront him about the issue, and tell him u feel very uncomfortable knowing he's watching this smut in front of him and possibly the Mother. Since the Mother can not have sexual intercource, and he is a man with needs, watching this type of thing may be disturbing to you, but your father has his needs of self pleasure, but maybe he should try to be alot more descret about his viewing pleasures. I'm sure he doesn't mean to hurt your Mom, but like I said hes a MAN. So try to understand, put yourself in his shoes, what would u do?, at least hes not out cheating on her.!!!!
2007-02-28 01:25:23 · answer #2 · answered by BRENDA B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, ur dad sounds like a man, I would look up too,... And, from the way u talk bout him, it seems dat u really respect him,.... Okie then, here is d deal,.... Its best that u NOT talk to ur mom bout dis,.. She will get seriously hurt. Instead, confront ur dad. Inform him that u spotted him watching such sites or videos and that u find it not right coming from a man who restricts ur lifestyle so much.
I dun mean dat u should be harsh wif him, but, sumtimes, u gotto tackle a problem wif a firm grip on it. Dis problem with ur dad should be discussed when u guys are like doing something together. Oni the two of you. Then, mention this matter to him, as if its just a common thing to u,... U can inquire what he seems to think if you were caught PERFORMING this act. How would he react to it? Such questions would draw regret within a man,...
Yet, as a man, he has urges too,.... I dun wana say nething to hurt neone,.... yt, if ur dad says that his bed life sux, its best that you confront ur mom n gently let it out to her dat ur dad feels down lately until dat he mentioned it to u (u gotto find/create a cover story to him), But, its best that ur dad n mom sit down together and find an answer to this problem.
The best of luck to everything!
2007-02-28 01:30:04 · answer #3 · answered by mel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most men watch porn, especially lesbian porn. He probably isn't going to change. As long as he still loves your mom and is faithful to her, leave it alone. She probably knows anyways. If it doesn't bother her, and he isn't going to great lengths to defy her, then there isn't anything you can do. Sometimes you just have to accept it. I hate to say that, but there's only so much you can do.
2007-02-28 01:10:19 · answer #4 · answered by Buffy C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with a man having sexual urges and using a video to help himself out. If you had said that he was having an affair, that would be different. But this is good for him and your mom.
Maybe there is another reason. It is hard to see your parents as sexual beings. They made you....smile and be glad that your father is being loyal to her.
2007-02-28 01:07:05 · answer #5 · answered by kishoti 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok in the first place that is just gross!!! and yes if i were you...i would talk with my mother about whats going, and let her know how you feel about it...its ok to talk with your mom privately and let her know how you feel about things, and what she should know in whats going on SO GO AND TALK WITH YOUR MOM PRIVATELY OK about this situation
2007-02-28 01:17:10 · answer #6 · answered by mary_parenteau 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
it is not your business. your dad is grown and entitled to his own sexual behavior. you do not say he is cheating on mom so just stay out of it. NOT YOUR BUSINESS.
2007-02-28 16:37:03 · answer #7 · answered by pnut 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i would be sick to my stomach too....i wouldn't know what i'd do..maybe tell him not to watch it and it makes you sick.
2007-02-28 01:16:39 · answer #8 · answered by Ry126 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋