I met a guy online a month ago. We have never had a real date but we have chatted alot and he did come by to see me at work. He is a nice guy, not a pyscho or anything. There are things that I don't like about him like the fact that he has 2 young children when I have one who is almost grown and he is much older than me. He is very busy not necessary with work, although it does cause him to travel some, but with social work and his church. He does alot of good I am sure but he seems to put dating on the back burner although he says he is looking for someone to spend his life with. We agree on alot of stuff and I enjoy talking to him but he is not available alot because he is tired from doing stuff all day so he can't even call. We are going out this week (during the day because he picks his kids up after school) but I would rather go out in the evening. I am going to end up sitting home friday night. I want to maintain a friendship with him but don't know if I should.
2007-02-27 16:39:16 · 4 answers · asked by reallyfedup 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Because of this I wan't to continue to look for someone to spend my life with and just don't want to commit myself to someone whom I don't even have a relationship with but since he has strong morals (nothing wrong with that) he might think that I am not interested in him if I am still looking. It's just that I don't want to settle for someone who has no time for me but at the same time want to remain friends just in case things turn out differently and besides I do want to make some guy friends too. Should I keep in touch with him and go out with him occasionly while I continue to look for someone who was time for me or should I just not waste time with him since he has disappointed me many times in this past week not even calling because he did too many things that day and zapped all his energy out?
2007-02-27 16:42:45 · update #1
No more sitting around waiting for him to be available! If he can't accomodate your schedule and desires as well, then move on. There are plenty of guys who would love to spend time with you and make you a priority. You and this guy just don't seem to be on the same page. Don't settle!
2007-02-27 16:43:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you like him more than maybe even YOU realize to me. Of course, all I have to go on is your description. As hard as it is to find a decent guy and if you have similar opinions about things, I would give it some more time. Have you ever sat down and honestly told him everything you have put here? I think you should, because he might not even realize that is how you feel. Also, he could be trying to "take things slow" and doesnt know you are ready to kick it up a notch. Tell him you feel like you are always his last priority, and if he is really into you and wants to keep you around, that is going to have to change. Offer to help him screen babysitters and check their references so you two can go out. Would everybody (you, him and his kids) going out to eat be an option? Then you can go back to his house with him after the meal and after the kids go to bed, you two could watch a movie or something. Maybe he thinks you want to be "out" with him and doesnt know you just want to spend time with him, whether it is at his home or wherever (I do not even know if you would want to do that, just saying it would be an option) And if you do not want to have a talk with him about it, or it does not change anything, I would still keep in contact with him. You never know, after a while he could realize he wants you back as more than a friend and is willling to make an effort. But also I would not turn down opportunities with new men during the time you are waiting to see if he will come around or not. Hope this helped and GOOD LUCK!
2007-02-28 00:51:48 · answer #2 · answered by Brandi A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take it slowly, try not to lose your heart in the process and see how things progress. Do not date him exclusively, but let him know you will date others.
2007-02-28 00:44:24 · answer #3 · answered by RY 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u want a friendship go for it...........but if u want more........cut it off. its my opinion.........but i always think, ive got friends.......if i want more.........why complicate things by walking that ambiguous line.
2007-02-28 00:43:54 · answer #4 · answered by blkhawk51 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋