ten points for funny original raunchy jokes!
2007-02-27 16:35:07 · 7 answers · asked by Miklo 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MICHAEL JACKSON AND ACNE??? acne doesn't come on your face till your 13!!!
2007-02-27 16:54:19 · answer #1 · answered by that b puss 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ever wonder what your partner is really saying?
Here is what they say, and what it really means:
Did you come? == Because I didn't.
I have something to tell you. == Get tested.
I'm a Romantic. == I'm poor.
I'll give you a call. == I'd rather have my nipples eaten off
by wild dogs than see you again.
Trust me. == I'm cheating on you.
I love you. == You're a good lay.
I think we should just be friends. == You're ugly.
Haven't I seen you before? == Nice ***.
I want to make love to you. == Let's ****.
Was it good for you? == I'm insecure about my manhood.
We need to talk. == I'm pregnant.
I had a wonderful time last night. == Who the hell are you?
I've been thinking a lot. == You're not as attractive as when
I was drunk.
I've learned a lot from you. == Next!
I want a commitment. == I'm sick of my dildo.
I think we should see other people. == I have been seeing other
people.
Let's get married. == Now can we ****?
We don't have to do anything until you are ready. == Put out or
get out.
I feel it's time to express our love for each other. == Give me
head.
I still think about you. == I miss the sex.
Is there something wrong? == Is it supposed to be this soft?
You're so mature. == I hope you're eighteen.
Yes...Yes..."scream!" == Aren't you done yet?
very dirty but its what you asked for...
2007-02-28 15:19:10 · answer #2 · answered by Garbo's snowflake 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt this would be considered dirty but i found it funny nonetheless...
so theres this barber in his shop cutting hair and one day this guy comes in and asks how long the wait is for a trim..
the barber says about and hour...the guy says ok ill be back...and leaves...
a few days later the same guy pops in and again asks what the wait is for a trim...this time the barber said it was going to be about 2 hours...so again the guy says hell be back later and leaves
another couple days go by and still the guy hasnt come back for his hair cut...well a few more days pass and he finally comes back and asks how long the wait is...the barber tells him about an hour and a half today...again the guy says hell be back and leaves...
this time the barber says to his friend at the shop 'do me a favor...go follow that guy and see where he keeps disappearing to...why doesnt he just wait?' so his friend goes after the guy and comes back a half hour later in histerics...
the barber says 'well?...whats so funny what did you find out? where does this guy go?' his friend stops laughing and says 'your house'
much funnier when someone who can tell jokes tells it...sorry haha
2007-02-27 17:04:46 · answer #3 · answered by imaginadia510 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
An escaped convict broke into a house and tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom.
As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his voluptuous young wife, bound up on the bed in a skimpy nightgown, and whispered, "Honey, this guy hasn't seen a woman in years.
Just cooperate with anything he wants. If he wants to have sex with you, just go along with it and pretend you like it. Our lives depend on it."
"Dear," the wife hissed, spitting out her gag, "I'm so relieved you feel that way, because he just told me he thinks you are really cute!"
: )
2007-02-27 16:43:59 · answer #4 · answered by Mommy To Be in April 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In the days of old , when knights were bold , and rubbers had yet to be invented.She took a sock , wrapped it around his c-ock , and that is how babies were prevented!
2007-02-27 20:12:32 · answer #5 · answered by w0ndA C-unt cumming near you 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig ?
A teddy boar!
2007-02-27 17:10:17 · answer #6 · answered by Rajni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love you...lol ...hahaha...L4A..;-)
2007-02-27 16:41:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋