I am just a friend but he has so much to offer. He's got low self esteem and seems to tell people what they want to hear. All I have been doing is listening to him and giving him advice when I feel it's appropriate. And I let him know that I am not judgemental because I have made mistakes myself. We're only human. Tomorrow is another day. And I DON'T tell him what he should or shouldn't do. Is there more I can do or say?
2007-02-27 14:08:46 · 7 answers · asked by Netta 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
you can't help self esteem for someone else.....a lot of young people are here, it will pass
2007-02-27 14:12:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you mean self destructive as in self-injury?
If you do(If you don't, skip to the last paragraph), the best thing you can do for the moment is to be supportive. If you truly think there's a cause for concern, tell someone. Tell a counselor on school or campus or simply someone who can help. You will feel bad and he will be mad at you but you are helping him in the long run. Self-injury is addictive and it is very hard to stop on your own.
Without taking control, the very best thing is to be available. Let him know that he can call you any time. It's a great strategy for self-harmers to be able to call someone and direct their energy somewhere else.
You're also doing the right thing not telling him to stop. That tends to make things worse and just make the person angry at you. Talking about it is always good, as long as he's willing.
Last paragraph: (^^) If he's simply putting himself down, you can be there for him as well. What you're doing is perfect. We all go into ruts where we feel bad about each other, especially in teenage and young adult years. Generally, they do pass. If this doesn't after a while, it may be a cause for more worry. Small things over time wear people down.
2007-02-27 14:27:12 · answer #2 · answered by Jello 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you mean self-destructive as in suicide, then have the following numbers available to him and you.
1-800-273-TALK
1-800-SUICIDE
These are the National Suicide prevention Help-Line and Hot-Line If he feels or says he feels like harming himself he can go to the first line for expert help talking it over. The second number is more serious. It is for a crisis. Immanent danger of suicide. You can go to the first line and tell them what you have told us; they are professionals and can give better advice than us.
Just be a friend and help him with his self esteem with out flattery. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
2007-02-27 17:26:42 · answer #3 · answered by Mad Mac 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One of the ways people can increase their self esteem is by doing things to help others, like writing letters for Amnesty International to help prisoners of conscience, or helping Meals on Wheels for 2 hours a fortnight; there are hundreds to choose from, You could say that you are thinking of improving YOUR self esteem and have a long list of worthwhile causes, like Greenpeace, and charities, like Oxfam (try Google and Wikipedia and your search engine) and you need a bit of help choosing.
2007-02-27 14:31:10 · answer #4 · answered by CLICKHEREx 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When it comes right down to it we can't fix other people. We can be a good infulence on them, but when it comes down to it, we are all alone. This person needs to be responsible for their own issues.
2007-02-27 16:46:54 · answer #5 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
their is nothing more u can do . you are their as a friend and u are their listing to him and just try to up lift him by telling him why he is special to u
2007-02-27 14:32:57 · answer #6 · answered by crystal w 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Help them the Best you can from a SHORT DISTANCE ! ! !
2007-02-27 14:33:00 · answer #7 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋