In my culture, the guy is supposed to take care of everything...from the ring, the engagement party, the wedding, the honeymoon, the dress, etc... Since we are not sharing the same culture, is it ok for the girl to offer to share the cost to buy the ring, the wedding and everything else together ... rather than having the guy to pay for the ring & the honeymoon and the girl/family is to take care of the wedding as the way it is normally done here or have the guy to pay for everything???
2007-02-27 11:09:13 · 17 answers · asked by lisamarie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You must remember its a wedding meaning 2 people are going to become one. As long as you agree and she agrees on things then you should not worry...The ring and the wedding dress is your gift..no matter what culture you are from...
The rest is extras and both must talk about it and share it as it indicates a life long with sharing...good and bad...
2007-03-03 05:10:00 · answer #1 · answered by Ariana 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is OK for the couple to share the cost of the engagement ring, they're expensive. Most guys will end up putting it on a credit card and most women will end up helping out with the bills anyway.
If the couple is older than 25, then it is customary for them together to pay for everything unless the family wants to help out, and there's no expectation that the bride's family will pay, unless your culture or tradition dictates it.
A good way to save money (and grief) on the engagement ring thing is for the man to pick out the STONE at a jewelry store without the woman, then have it put on a simple (temporary) gold ring, like $100. The small ring will make the stone look HUGE, and that's all that counts for the engagement.
That's what he would present for the engagement, then they BOTH pick out the wedding ring and have the stone mounted in the new ring in time for the wedding.
Get the jewelry store to agree to take back the simple gold (engagement) ring and credit you the $100 or whatever the temporary one cost and allow you to put that toward the the other ring(s). The stores will ALWAYS let you do this, and it works out great because you dont' have to buy 2 rings, the girl doesnt' have to pick her own engagement ring, and she doesn't get stuck with a ring she doesn't like.
2007-02-27 19:28:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love that culture thing!!! Where can I go to meet my next husband? lol In the meantime, I wouldnt share the cost of the engagement ring....that would be a huge RED FLAG!!! After that, there is usually a discussion with both families depending on the age of the bride. If you are paying for your own wedding, then of course you share expenses (you usually open a joint account soon after the engagement to make it easier to make payments). If you are not paying for your own wedding, the question is moot, you have to wait to see if anyone from the families is offering to help or bless you with a reception....
2007-02-28 00:39:46 · answer #3 · answered by Sweetserenity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it kind of depends on how much your culture plays a part in your life and your family. If it's really important than I'd say no but if your family and you are pretty americanized then I'd say let her help if she wants to. I think she should definately be apart of buying the rings so that you make sure she likes what she gets and has to wear for the rest of her life. as for buying the engagement ring...you should pay for the whole thing same as the wedding ring...just as she should pay for your wedding ring...the rest is just kind of whatever you want to do.
2007-02-27 19:43:04 · answer #4 · answered by Crystal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The man should buy the woman's wedding ring and vice versa. The engagement ring is the guy's expense, but he should be pretty sure of the girl's tastes in that area before purchasing.
The bride should also pay for her own gown. Sit down and talk to your sweetheart about wedding expenses and work things out. You should not have to pay for everything!
2007-02-27 19:23:02 · answer #5 · answered by Juanitaville 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most of the time, bride's parents pay for the wedding; or you could share the cost with your fiance on the wedding costs, and today that is becoming more prevalent. In our culture you pay for the engagement ring; the photographer; and the honeymoon. Bride pays for wedding dress; limousines; flowers; and accessories; engagement party is given by bride's parents most of the time, but could be shared by both parents.
2007-02-27 19:19:41 · answer #6 · answered by cardgirl2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy should pick and pay for the engagement ring, wedding reception and the honeymoon. Depending on your ages and whether this is your first wedding on not depends on who should pay. My finance picked out my engagement ring which made it even more special that he took the time and research to do so. This is not our first wedding so we are paying for the wedding ourselves. Good Luck and I hope everything works out for you two.
2007-02-27 20:07:01 · answer #7 · answered by Redhead 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the last thing you want is her disappointed when you ask her to marry you. if you are still worried about the surprise let her pick it out or something similar and let that be the last of it she see's until you ask her.
regarding whether she should help you pay for it or not, just finance it. It will in the end become her bill. Or you could just tack it on to the cost of the wedding to be shared.
2007-02-27 19:26:47 · answer #8 · answered by th1despina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that you should buy the ring and the wedding dress.This is a present from the guy.As for the wedding in general,you can offer to share all other costs together.
2007-02-27 19:14:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that whatever you both feel comfortable with is what you should do. As a woman, I wouldn't feel comfortable with letting the man pay for everything and at the same time, I probably couldn't afford to pay for most of it by myself either. I think that if you guys have found a compromise that you both feel comfortable with then do it regardless of what your culture is. Good luck and congratulations.
2007-02-27 19:15:53 · answer #10 · answered by Angela B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋