My ex mother in law has terminal cancer. She doesn't have that much longer to live, maybe a month or two. I was married to her son when she was diagnosed 2 years ago, but we have since divorced. We were married for 14 years. I have been dating the same man for a while now and she as well as my ex father in law have met him and get along great with him. I am still close to my ex in laws. The topic of the funeral has come up and they both say to attend, and that if I want to that my fiance should attend with me. My ex husband and I are cordial to each other and we have a son together. His girlfriend - the main reason for our divorce - however, has not been welcomed into the family and no one cares for her. I doubt she will attend the funeral. Even though my ex-inlaws say I should attend with my fiance, what do others think? Should I bring him with or is this something I should go on my own? My fiance says it is up to me as he doesn't want to make anyone uncomfortable.
2007-02-27 09:53:28 · 13 answers · asked by qt3.14 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Take him with you. If you are divorced from your ex-husband, this family is now just your friends. If you have a close friend die wouldn't you want the love and support of your fiance to comfort you? Everyone has their own opinions on people they meet, and if they liked your fiance, even better. I don't see where anyone would be uncomfortable.
2007-02-27 10:59:38 · answer #1 · answered by jennisthedude 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your ex in-laws gave you the go ahead to bring him, so don't feel like you are a bad person for bringing him. Besides, if they know each other (even if only through you) and get along well, wouldn't he want to go even if you didn't? You are not doing it out of disrespect to your ex, you are doing it out of respect for two people who you care about and care about you.
2007-02-27 11:55:00 · answer #2 · answered by Brian G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you didn't offer my answer. I would not go period. And I would try to stay at a formal distance. You don't have to be rude to people to make them acknowledge the reality of your situation. But since you seem to be extra friendly, I think you should go but only with your fiance!! That way it is clear that you two are together now and that's the way it is!! Good Luck!! @8-)
P.S. Your fiance might be saying he doesn't care when he really does. Look to your future and not to your past.
2007-02-27 10:13:43 · answer #3 · answered by Dovey 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am still close if not closer to my ex in laws. They are still my children's Grandparents regardless of their son and my failed relationship. Just recently my ex mother in law had a stroke, my husband, myself and my daughter were all there when she had a dangerous surgery and nobody felt it was the wrong thing to do.
2007-02-27 10:09:18 · answer #4 · answered by Mother of a Marine 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you love this man? Are you in love with this man? If yes was the answer to both questions, ask yourself this one question?
If he were your husband right now would you want him to go with you?
You now have your answer to your own question.
Good luck and I’m sorry to hear about your mother in-law.
2007-02-27 11:51:01 · answer #5 · answered by choiceav 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you and your fiance should go together. You need someone there for support. However, on the other hand, if YOU don't feel comfortable about it go alone.
2007-02-27 10:32:24 · answer #6 · answered by Tonya W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe since it was your life prior to his entrance into your life, and since it is under very difficult circumstances, why add any needless discomfort to the situation. I would suggest you go alone. Its up to you of course but I would go alone.
2007-02-27 10:22:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes. It shows he cares enough to be by your side and he is part of your life now.
2007-02-27 10:00:21 · answer #8 · answered by Dupont200 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your in-laws have already said that it is okay. Take him with you. He can be there to support you.
2007-02-27 10:02:08 · answer #9 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
from all you've said, it doesn't sound like anyone would be uncomfortable with him there. but will he be uncomfortable? if you want him by your side bring him with.
2007-02-27 11:48:13 · answer #10 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋