Okay, so awhile ago, I ended up in bad shoes. I had a guy friend who I was practically in love with and of course nothing happened so I hooked him up with my friend and then he eventually stopped talking to me and I found out through a friend that the girl I set him up with, started telling him all these lies about me so of course he believed her and stopped talking to me. So I got really cynical after that and swore off guys. My friend is the type to always want a guy that pays her all kinds of attention. So any guy she talks to, she starts feeling all warm and fuzzy so she asked me to give it another try with guys and I tried but it's all the same. I'm now at the point where I don't even want to get up in the morning, I'm so emotionally wore out. Is this normal ?? I can't sleep at night, I can't eat anymore even though my stomach is growling, I can't seem to keep anything down. What should I do ??
2007-02-27 08:28:45 · 15 answers · asked by the_wicked_itch_of_the_west 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I don't talk to either the guy or the girl.....He stopped talking to and as soon as I found out she was spreading lies about me, I confronted her and of course she denied it all so I ignored her. I knew it was bad to give it another shot with guys, it was only hurting myself but I thought maybe since I lost weight and I was feeling better, it'd make a difference. I know I have low self esteem but I know others who are uglier and are willing to have sex with just anyone.
2007-02-27 08:35:53 · update #1
No actually I'm in my mid-20's....I just don't understand why I'm so against being in a relationship yet the stupidest things irritate me. Why do I care what he did to me ?? I know for a fact I don't care about the girl but I think because he left me so coldly and just out of the blue, it makes me question. I mean me and this guy text 75 times a day, we'd talk at all hours of the night, for hours, just good friends. I knew he wasn't into me and accepted that. Why couldn't he be nice as well and confront me about what this girl was telling him?? WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY
2007-02-27 08:46:27 · update #2
You dont need a man to make you happy that is you funnily enough. If this guy couldnt ask you about the lies your so called friend was spreading about you then he's not worth it no matter how many times a day you texted each other.
Get on with your life - do you work? go to the gym - exercise helps when you feel like crap and you will start to feel a bit better and you will get over this and move on
2007-02-28 06:44:41 · answer #1 · answered by Lady Claire - Hates Bigotry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I take it your still a teenager ? You shouldn't worry so much about guys right now, and I'm not meaning to be patronising! You seem to be a bit low as well (not sleeping,eating etc) you should talk to a mum or a sister if you have one, you seem like you need a good old chat with someone.
If your guy friend really loved you or even liked you he wouldn't jump to conclusions about you through this girl. Is he really worth all this stress if he believes some lies off a girl you hooked him up with over you?? If it really is bothering you, why don't you meet up with him and talk to him, or ring him and talk to him. I suggest you don't email or write to him, else he may use whatever you say in writing against you or show everyone.
Right now you need to concentrate on having your girl friends around you, the right guy will come along when you least expect it. You need to remember that you have to love yourself before you can expect to be loved.
But please do not be silly and have a nice hot bath and get an early night and a good night sleep. Don't risk your health over all of this , its not worth it, things can only get better
xx
2007-02-27 16:38:43 · answer #2 · answered by Melanie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW!
Why "swear off" guys? I mean seriously... I've had some pretty bad burritos, but that doesn't mean I can't eat mexican food! There are great guys out there regardless of the reason for this latest problem.
I will note this... the problem you are having ... isn't with the guy. Its with the girl. she was the "friend" that you trusted, and the guy did what any normal person would do... he believed someone that he cared about. Isn't that what all of us want our significant others to do? Believe us when we say something? In this case, you got screwed because she was talking trash about you.
I know you dont want to talk to him, but if you want to resolve this problem rather than just moving on, you need to. You cant expect him to figure all of this out through telepathy!
If you'd rather walk away from this situation, and forget about the friendship (thats your choice, not ours), then thats fine.
My personal experience, is that you need to surround yourself with REAL friends. I see so many people that surround themselves with other narcisstic and egotistical idiots, that its no wonder they have these problems. When someone cares more about their bad hair day, then about you as a friend, you know you can't trust them. Please do a better job of surrounding yourself with friends that care... friends you can call family.
About guys.... you just have to communicate better. So many women want the guy to ask them out, tell them that they are interested, and make the first move. Maybe the women think they are showing interest, when in reality the guy doesn't see it. My thoughts... TAKE CHARGE! Ask him out, and communicate what you think. The ones worth dating will welcome this approach.
If you have a relationship built on communication... whether its with friends or a boyfriend, you wont have to worry about idiots like your "friend" who deceive others about you.
2007-02-27 17:53:55 · answer #3 · answered by the_thoughtless_ponderer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep truding through life and eventually a good guy will find you and give you the warm fuzzies again. It's normal to go through a time that it seems every guy is a disaster waiting to happen. Try dating an older guy, sometimes that helps. At least in my case it did. My hubby is 8 years older than me. I'm mid 30's.
2007-02-27 16:33:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to relax!! Sounds like you're really stressing out over everything. Best thing i can suggest is to try to take things easy, don't let any1 pressure you. Try to see life as a bit of fun, not as the quest for a guy.
And don't stop eating, even if you force food down yourself. I've been there and it can get ugly. Just make sure you get in a good diet.
2007-02-27 16:33:41 · answer #5 · answered by Phantom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aww sweetheart,
No doubt about it your in a right mess
i understand, but honestly, i know this might hurt but you cannot be friends with that girl.
She is killing you
i'm still in the same situation as you
and i'm worried about who i'm gonna hang out with
thing is, i have other friends who surely wont mind
And i want to be okay
all shes gonna keep on doing is bringing you down
your far better then this
i promise
good luck.
2007-02-27 16:33:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to have a friend like her, well like I said "used to." She sounds like a skank to me. You would probably feel a lot better about yourself if you weren't friends with her anymore, esp. bc she is making things so competetive between you two and starting a whole bunch of mess for nothing but her own satisfaction and desperate pleas for attention. Just tell her you have grown apart and you don't need to hang with her anymore. She is not your friend if she talks about you behind your back.
2007-02-27 16:35:48 · answer #7 · answered by Kay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Focus on yourself. Get your education, some hobbies... cool it with this friend for a while, she's causing you grief.
Improve yourself, and the guys will notice... then you'll get better guys too.
2007-02-27 16:31:40 · answer #8 · answered by slipknotraver 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Indulge yourself with anything and everything. It's all about you and only you. Life is too short for drama.
2007-02-27 16:38:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You problem.......calling your enemies, friends. Throw away those flip-flops & invest in some better souls
2007-02-27 16:34:39 · answer #10 · answered by beenabytch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋