Do men ever change?

Question

My ex and I broke up because he cheated and thought he got the other girl pregnant. She turned out not to be and is crazy as hell. Now he wants me back and says everything will be different. We had a lot of problems including some physical and mental abuse, but i still care for him alot, we were together for two and half years. we both had our faults, and both made mistakes. i want to settle down and have a normal faithful relationship. Do you think he could change and be the kind of guy that i want to be with ?

Answer 1

You are scare to try and see someone who is worth having
is out there and that,s is why you are settling for less than what
you truly can have in life, even if he has change which is
possible but each relationship that you have teach you
a lesson so that you join together with your husband
if you backward then you never know what could be
forward in your life, and you can miss the oppurtunity to see.
you have grab every positive force out here that can benefit
you every way you can have it don,t settle for less
if you are worth so much and believe me you are
I almost drove myself sick mentally of an ex, but now
i no that i can have better,through God,who will never lie
to you but guide through true and honesty. and wholeness
friends, and my Wonderful family. you are Beauitful and
deserve better, so just do better and get better.

Answer 2

Some do. But, I would be willing to bet that you are under 25. Lets look at this logistically. You and your ex broke up because he cheated (he thought the grass was greener...) So, you broke up not because of the physical/mental abuse...but because he cheated...did you not find that pain abusive? You will care for him I am sure as you were not the one who was out messing around...that is why you didn't experience closure with the situation. Tell you what...as a guy who has been down this road with my EX (she cheated 3 times and we had kids) try this...stay broken up with him and surround yourself with friends, and family for a year. If after a year if you find that you can't live without him and you were truly meant to be together then it will happen. I however would be willing to bet that he will have moved on and got some other person that he is acting like his old self with pregnant. Wanna bet? Tell him to seek counseling as there is NEVER an excuse for ANY MAN to put his HANDS (abusively) on a woman PERIOD! Chalk it up to life experience and move on! You deserve better! ;)

Answer 3

ummm, I don't think this is a good idea at all. Sounds all to familiar to me. This sounds exactly like my last relationship. Usually they don't change. There's always a possibility, but more than likely he'll always be like that. It sucks, but its true.
Really, I think if you just take the steps towards forgetting about him you'll find your prince charming. You'll find someone that isn't a work in progress. That's what happened to me. Its so much easier now. I used to worry every time my exbf went somewhere when I took him back cause it was always in the back of my mind that he was going to do it again or something. You have to ask yourself if you can really forget about what he did. If not, then you won't be able to have a good, healthy relationship with him ever again. You will always doubt him.
There are good guys out there!!! I know, I found one!

Answer 4

NOPE !!!! Unless he has received professional help from someone then NO. He may really believe what he is saying to you but if he has a problem with abusing you then he is going to continue regardless. And why do you say you both had your faults? Is that what he lead you to believe? (part of the mental abuse) don't fall for that crap. You can care for him and all, but care for yourself first and foremost, then rethink how you feel about him. Sounds like you deserve better than this. If you go back it will only get harder and harder to get away. Move on sweetie. Good luck

Answer 5

AHA Maybe for a while, maybe forever,But you will never change on how you felt him being with someone else,Lying , cheating, they laughed at you for not knowing.
Had not cared how much pain you are in.Possibly giving you critters for life.He is right everything will be different ,because he got caught.If he didn't get caught it would be still going on.Read these sites see how may cheaters there are,then make a call .Cheaters cheat,
If he care that's all he had to do was say NO.
Sorry for being so blunt.Good luck. Get a medical check up.

Answer 6

Like what Dr Phil would say ....."you are not in love with him but you are in the with the man you wish he could be" and if there was abuse in your relationship what do you think would change him for the better??? even with counseling Think it would be hard for people to change there old habits and ways unless they are willing to do so and still there in no guarantee it will last for the better.........

Answer 7

I got to the words "physical and mental abuse" and stopped. No need to go further. DO NOT get back with him. Find someone who respects you and will give you the love you deserve.

Answer 8

Well you know some men do change..but honestly I wouldn't go into the relationship again. Because once that trust is gone...it will be gone forever..and regardless if both of you are faithful. at least one of you is gonna remain untrusting..and drive the other one insane..and it won't work.
~G

Answer 9

IF there was phyiscal and mental abuse, I would not even try to get back with him. That is one thing that will not change for anyone. Find someone who will love you and care for you.

Answer 10

If he was abusive before, he will be again. Guys that hit, always hit, those of us that don't, never will.

The cheating is the least of your worries, that can change, but the abuse will be there forever.