i'm 21 years old, in college, and I have had the hots for my trumpet section leader in band for the past 2 years. he's really geeky and weird, but i like him cuz he's real sweet and i'm attracted to him physically. he's a virgin, so i guess he don't know much about girls. he don't really date either. we're friends, but occasionally act like we want more but this has been going on for 2 years. i've tried to talk about being more than friends, but he gets upset. he won't date and most girls think he is too weird and geeky anyways, but he'll hold MY hand and hug ME. tried to kiss me once, but since he's so tall, he kind of missed 'cause I wasn't paying attention and turned my head when he was leaning down. he's been too scared, and kinda mad, since then to do anything else. I love him, as MORE than a friend, but this guy just doesn't get it!!! And the little things, like holding hands hurts cuz i don't know if he loves me back. What do I do about this dork? HELP!!!
2007-02-27 06:48:55 · 7 answers · asked by MaggieMaeBrowne 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Oh my. Here's what I think is going on.
He likes you a lot, but is sooo afraid that taking the next step in the relationship he will lose your freindship.
He is scared to death of being rejected by you. The more he likes you, the more he respects you, the more the rejection will hurt.
You need to get him to make up his mind.
Here's what I would do. Ask him where he thinks this freindship is going. Tell him that you like him but if all he wants to be is just friends, then you need to make yourself available to other guys.
Tell him you undertsand he is afraid of getting hurt, you're afraid of getting hurt too.
Truth is, he may not be ready for a relationship. He may be so self conscious that he can't see anyone loving him. And if that is the case, I don't hold much hope that you can fix him. Only he can do that. You also have to worry that he may latch on to you out of desperation. If he hasn't dated, he doesn't know what he really wants in someone else. He hasn't figured out what it is he is looking for, what he will and won't put up with.
I wish you both luck. He sounds like a really nice guy, just has to grow up.
A~
2007-02-27 07:10:23 · answer #1 · answered by BigMac2xk 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He just need a little help,you've got to make the move,obvious the guy likes you very much and because he's shy,he's scared to make that move.Help him,get real close to him,touch him with a sexy look and give him a small kiss (very very small)he'll want some more,trust me and stare at him,like asking for more,if he doesn't kiss you,do it again,and then give him a nice passionate kiss.He'll loosen up.so..........Good Luck!
2007-02-27 15:24:52 · answer #2 · answered by genie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is interested but that he is super shy. When he tried to kiss you that one time it probably took everything that he had to do that and since he missed he might fee that you did it on purpose. I say just tell him again that you would really like to start a relationship with him and that you really care about him. You might want to plant a kiss on him to get it if it comes down to it. Sometimes guys don't get hints like women do so it's best to just put it all out on the table to he will have to choice but to see what it is. Good luck
2007-02-27 14:59:15 · answer #3 · answered by ltwatkins77 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you turned your head when he was about to kiss you, maybe he thought that you evade him...there is no way for him to know that you didn't. You should go ahead and tell him the way you feel, I'm pretty sure he would be happy to know you like him.
2007-02-27 14:59:55 · answer #4 · answered by Jersey girl on Florida. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to make the first move. Kiss him first. If he dosen't react to that, then maybe he's gay, or just not into you that way.
2007-02-27 15:05:53 · answer #5 · answered by tHEwISE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u like him i think u should tell him how u fell let him know u like him mayb he likes u to if u dont ask u will never know good luck
2007-02-27 14:53:44 · answer #6 · answered by barroom_babyblue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the two of you need to get drunk together... if nothing happens then he's gay...
2007-02-27 14:54:55 · answer #7 · answered by john j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋