Sometimes people compare me to my sister, and I hate it?

Question

People in my family always compare me to my (older) sister and make me feel like I'm not as talented as she is in such things as art and sewing. She is a really good artist and whenever they see her work, they ask me, "how come you're not good at art?" Recently I started taking a sewing class and a relative asked me, "why did your sister learn sewing on her own and you need to take classes?" I feel bad because I feel like people think she's more talented and much smarter then me. I know that we are both different and have our own strengths and weaknesses but it makes me feel bad because others don't see the things that I'm good at. What should I do?

Answer 1

i should let people know that your not your sis.. i know how you feel.. i have people telling me that how come i can't do this(break dance or do a certain move) we all your other bro's could.. makes me mad but i forget about it and i just move on doing what i do best poping and locking.. so do shine out..

Answer 2

I know how you feel, because I used to face the same problem. Not only with my sis, but I was also compared to all my other cousins. Growing up, I can't help but to have low self esteem. The thing is, you can't blame or hate your sister for this because she's not in control of what other people thinks or say. Sometimes, the only way to shut everything up is to detach ourselves from this 'negetive' group of people. Find what YOU love doing, and enjoy yourself doing it. Why are you learning to sew? Is it because of your sister? If it's not something you like doing, then, stop doing it and look for other stuff of your interest. That way, there's nothing for them to compare you two with. The next time they compare you two, just smile politely and say, "Well, I'd like to think that my work has its own uniqueness to it too." Or, "Well, some people are born with the talent, other people had to develop it, and one way to do that is by taking classes."

Answer 3

What are you good at? Focus on that and do it as long as you want to. Be happy for your sister that she is good at something. It's ok to be disappointed in the dumbheads who say things that hurt your feelings. But don't think about it too much 'cuz it will interfere in you being your best.

I have two sisters. We all have different talents. It makes for a good balanced team.

Answer 4

Unfortunately, just because people are in the same family, they are expected to have the same talents. Remind those people what your strengths are while commending your sister for hers. Soon they will get the idea to brag on you for what you can do and not ask why you are not like your sister.

Answer 5

well no two individuals are alike identical twins aside. instead of trying to do what your sister is good at try to stand out by doing a different type of art form where you excel. consider what you like and what your strenght lies and pursue that. and if all else fails just remember " you'll alway be the best you there every was, is, and will be" have fun with yourself and good luck!

Answer 6

every one has talent.the only matter is in which field.i'm in the same boat as you cuz my younger sis is much prettier and people always say that she is my elsest;she act more mature than me though...but then, what do i care for?cuz i have my own world,friends and have gone through many adventures that my sis might not have been into.just go on and ignore what others said.you dont need to try so hard to impress them.if you are good enough, people will automatically notice you.have confident and faith in yourself

Answer 7

Honey, I know how you feel! My older sister is Ms. Perfect! Always did everything right. She was better at school, sports, basically everything that people judge you on. I've had people actually say to me, "How come your sister is so petite, slender, and beautiful and your so BIG AND FAT!" Comments like that just make things worse. When you find out how to fix your problem, please let me know so maybe I can fix mine.

Answer 8

1. "Holly (Ilex Aquifolium) is often thought of as the Bach Flower Remedy for anger but this isn't necessarily the case. Where Holly is for anger, it will be because the anger is based specifically on hatred, suspicion, envy or jealousy. But in other cases other remedies would be needed, such as Impatiens when anger is due to impatience, Vervain where it is caused by a sense of injustice, or Chicory where the angry person feels snubbed and hurt by ingratitude in others.

Holly is for very negative, aggressive feelings directed at others. The basic problem is an absence of love, and the remedy works to encourage generosity of spirit and openness towards others.

Dr. Bach's Description: For those who sometimes are attacked by thoughts of such kind as jealousy, envy, revenge, suspicion. For the different forms of vexation. Within themselves they may suffer much, often when there is no real cause for their unhappiness."

http://www.herbalremedies.com/holly10mlvial.html

2. "Walnut (Juglans Regia) is the Bach Flower Remedy to help to protect against outside influences in general, and against the effects of change in particular.

Walnut types are people who are fulfilling their purpose in life but who under the influence of the opinions, theories or beliefs of others, or of external circumstances in general, may be led to doubt their path. They are not like Cerato people, who actively seek out the opinions of others, but instead may be affected almost despite themselves.

As a remedy against the effects of change, Walnut is useful at all the transitions of life, from being born to teething to going to school to puberty to marriage to childbearing to retirement and beyond. It helps to break links with the past so that the person can move forward with confidence and without undue suffering.

Dr. Bach's description: For those who have definite ideals and ambitions in life and are fulfilling them, but on rare occasions are tempted to be led away from their own ideas, aims and work by the enthusiasm, convictions or strong opinions of others. The remedy gives constancy and protection from outside influences."

http://www.herbalremedies.com/walnut10mlvial.html

3. http://www.fesflowers.com/ ("Flower Essence Services")

4. http://www.thesecret.tv/home.html ("The Secret")

5. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qftvt9IHHUM ("Vision Statement").

I hope you feel better soon!

Answer 9

join the club girl~ i have a twin sister and i love her a lot, but my mom has always compared us and it made me feel inadequte so i emailed her and confronted her (my mom) and told her how it made me feel and how it was not fair to do that to her children because i have 2 daughters and i do not do that to them because i find them both unique in different ways...i think she got the hint, but we have always had a strained relationship due to her scapegoating me since i was a little girl~

Answer 10

That should push you to not be like her be better that her you can do anything just know that just find a hobby that you are good at and make better grades than her